Hi Chris
Such a shame to hear your last experience in hospital didn't leave you feeling the way you'd like to feel, relieved and fully supported. With such a job, as a hospital staff member, elements of emotional detachment are required and understandably so, as this allows for pure analysis of a patient's status without emotions getting in the way. Unfortunately some can take it to the extreme. I recall when I had my first child, going back around 20 years. While I came across dozens of maternity staff members in hospital, only a couple felt supportive. The rest left me feeling like I was some foolish nuisance on a production line of mothers going in and out of that place.
Based on having developed a much healthier view of sensitivity, I've come to realise sensitivity is not just about feeling or sensing what's depressing or stressful, it's also about gaining a greater sense for a part of our self that may need to come to life more often. I've come to love my intolerant sense of self, for she's rather feisty and great for my self esteem. I can imagine if that part of me was not suppressed by the people pleaser in me when I had my 1st child, she would have led me to say to those careless staff members 'Do you really think this is the best way to treat a 1st time mum who's stressed, clueless and a little scared? Show me compassion. I have just brought a human being to life, give me the respect I deserve and nothing less'.
Had a conversation with my daughter a couple of days ago that went something like 'I think I've worked out how to naturally channel my intolerant sense of self in a more conscious way. All I need to do is get a little bit of rage churning and then it will naturally come to life, when I need it'. She smiled while telling me 'That's how I do it. If I want greater self esteem and courage, I get a bit of anger going, to start with'. I'm jealous, took me 52 years to work this out.
While so many people are trying so hard to work the emotion of anger out, sometimes it pays to master working it up😊
