NOT important just looking for advice

anonymous_username · ‎20-11-2022

Hi all!

So recently (like a week ago on Monday) I found out that someone I have been becoming friends with has been self harming. Turns out he has a kind of abusive father who gave him a lot of crap. This really made me sad as he is a really good person, but on Tuesday I accidentally found out that his recent ex-girlfriend that he is still close friends with also has some cuts. He broke up with her because he liked her best friend (they are dating now, ex-Gf still likes the other boy). She hadn’t told her best friend about her self harming yet and I didn’t want to confront her about it so I left it. Later that day she told one of her most trusted friends. I was glad that she told someone, but I also felt bad that I had left her alone.

I have been struggling with depressed thoughts since the start of this year but I don’t want to ask if I can take a test. This situation just tipped me over a barrier and I started self-harming myself as well. I blame myself for my friends situation and I feel guilty about not asking her about it when I found out. I told my youth group leader on Friday and they told me to tell my parents, but I don’t think it is that bad and I was getting better, but on Friday night I just had a huge mental breakdown and I was so panicked that he was going to tell my mum that I didn’t know what to do.

Talking here with BeyondBlue has really helped me so far but if you guys had any advice for this situation I would greatly appreciate it.

thanks,

Anonymous

smallwolf · ‎21-11-2022

hello.

I get it that you don't feel like talking to your parents (at least yet). Yet... I can also assure that as a parent, you also hope your children feel comfortable in being to talk to you about things troubling you. And if you do tell someone else, the concern you mentioned in also present. It also sounds like you are trying to find ways to "solve the problem", which is good. Sometimes we need additional help to do this and that is OK.

So...

Perhaps one thing you could try is to talk to people from Kids Helpline (https://kidshelpline.com.au/) and phone number is 1800 55 1800. You could also look on resources on their page also.

In relation to your friends (stuff you mentioned in the 1st paragraph)... Perhaps you could have talked to them and easy in hindsight. There are probably reasons at the time that made you not do anything. You might have been dealing with your own issues. Feeling guilty is normal.

If you want to chat more I will listen and respond.

anonymous_username · ‎24-11-2022

Thank you for your support!

I know I probably should have talked to her, but I found out while she was showing one of her close friends, so I thought that she’d be ok with their support.

Again, thank you so much for your comment! It actually helped a lot!

-A.U

smallwolf · ‎25-11-2022

cool. Thanks for replying. If you want/need to chat some more ...