I have nobody else to talk to.

[Russian_Red_Foxx]

I have been having a rough time lately because I have nobody to talk to. Here are my reasons:

1. I don't have any friends

2. While yes, I am getting counseling, I only feel comfortable talking about some of my smaller issues because the people I talk to work for the government. (no, what I wish I could talk about isn't morally wrong or illegal, but I still feel very uncomfortable)

3. My parents pretend to love me while favouring my sister as the golden child.

4. I don't feel comfortable talking on phone

Even though this is entirely anonymous, I still don't feel comfortable talking about my thoughts and feelings as they may be seen as pointless.

-RussianRedFoxx

[Giraffe]

Hi I’m glad you reached out. We are all here for you.

[quirkywords]

Russianredfox,

Your thoughts and feelings are very relatable and worthwhile.

Many like me can relate to 3 and 4 and also have trouble talking on the phone.

This is a nonjudgmental place that is very supportive and caring.
Welcome red Russia fox to the forum.

[smallwolf]

Hi.

Agree with quirky here. I see a psychologist and psychiatrist and can feel like a fraud and my issues are insignificant. And just like me... You matter! So when you feel ready and want to talk about what's going on, we can listen and respond with compassion and support.

[geoff]

Hello Russian_Red_Foxx, thanks for your post and when you or anyone is trying to deal with any type of mental illness, then all your thoughts are valuable, and if we have to talk with someone over the phone then we may be asked a question that puts us in an awkward or difficult situation and not quite sure how to respond, and I'm sure many of us have been caught out and feel embarrassed, but on this forum, you can take your time, read over what you've said, edit or delete what you want to tell us and then help fro people who have been in the same or similar circumstances can offer their own advice.

Just take your time because we'd really like to hear back from you, and if you need to start in a small way, then that's best for you.

Best wishes.

Geoff.

[Russian_Red_Foxx]

I might add that there has been one thing on my mind for a while, and that has been gaining the confidence to run away from home. I have done this before and I feel that this time I can be more prepared since I know what it feels like. I am considering this for several reasons:

1. My dreams and goals are unrealistic.

2. I want to be forgotten by my family since they only ever care about me when I almost die.

3. I am looking for an escape from my sister (and she has also been looking for an escape from me).

4. I have pretty much dropped out of school, so there is no point trying to restart my education.

5. The longer I stay, the less likely I will experience happiness.

I know this seems bold, but I would much rather uproot my life and become homeless than have to stay with my narcissistic family.

[Sophie_M]

Hey Russian_Red_Foxx,

Thanks so much for reaching out to our friendly community, we are so glad that you've taken a big step in sharing your thoughts and feelings here with us. We're so sorry to hear that what you've been going through at home, but please know that you've come to safe, non-judgemental space to talk things through and our community is here to offer as much support, advice and conversation as you need.

It sounds like you're feeling really stuck at the moment, and we think it might really help to be able to talk things through with the kind counsellors at Kids Help Line. They are a confidential and anonymous, telephone and online counselling service specifically for young people aged 25 and under, and are available 24/7 on 1800 55 1800, or also through online chat if you'd feel more comortable chatting online: https://kidshelpline.com.au/get-help/webchat-counselling We’d also welcome you to reach out to our Support Service, which is available 24/7 by phone on 1300 22 4636 or on Webchat 1pm-12am AEST on our website: www.beyondblue.org.au/getsupport for some extra support through this.

We hope that you keep checking back in and let us know how you are going when you feel up to it. We're all here for you.
 

[geoff]

Hello Russian_Red_Foxx, your points have been noted and understand that there's always a reason why somebody wants to run away from home, and each person has their own purpose why and the first is to be happy.

This doesn't necessarily mean you will be homeless and would like to hear back from you as to what stage you're at.

Best wishes.

Geoff.

[Russian_Red_Foxx]

So, I have another issue that I want to complain about, that being my birthday.

My birthday is coming up and my dad keeps saying that I need to celebrate it, when really I see nothing special since it is just another normal day that so happens to be the same date that I was born. I had an argument with him around 10 minutes ago where I kept trying to tell him that he shouldn't spend loads of money on me since all of my recent gifts have been worth well over $1000 which should be money going towards my sister instead since she only ever gets cheap stuff from Kmart. It's not that I love her (because I don't), it's the fact that the money should be spent on something else other than me. That's just one thing though. The main reason I don't want my birthday to be celebrated is because of the fact that suddenly everybody feels that they have to go out of their way to obsess over me, when they really shouldn't since they have better things to do. It also means that I suddenly cannot hide from anybody wishing me happy birthday. I don't want a day that is entirely about myself because suddenly everyone has to adjust to giving me unwanted happiness. I also feel that me being born shouldn't be celebrated because the only thing I have ever brought to society is tears (seriously, there is not one person that I am close to who hasn't cried at least once because of me). It's not just family causing problems about my birthday, it's also my friends because they force me into accepting gifts.

So basically to summarise, I don't my birthday to be celebrated as it just makes other people feel that they have to spend ridiculous amounts of money while obsessing over me when I want to be left alone.

[geoff]

Hello Russian_Red_Foxx, I understand how you feel about your birthday, probably the older we get the less attractive it is to celebrate and have to agree with you, although I wish my twin the very best and hope he enjoys his day with his family and grandchildren.

I think the questions from those who ring us are always concerned about how we are now feeling, but I've told them a long time ago that I have been well for a long time, but still feel as though it's an intrusion, but it's only caring, just as I ask them how are they going, but being centre of attention is not easy to cope with.

The only problem is I do the same to them on their birthday.

Take care.

Geoff.