Words: Friends or Foe? How can writing help you.

[quirkywords]

People can be afraid of words as they have no confidence in what they write. Maybe at school teachers have said negative things about their writing or their parents have said they don't write well.

Some people are anxious to write their first post as they wonder if they will make sense to others.

I believe words are your friends and everyone who can read this can write in meaningful way.

I want to look at how writing can help you

1) by helping you to explain and express your feelings to others

2) allowing you to connect to others through your words

3) by keeping a journal or starting a thread here and learn from your own writing and read others.

4) by helping you work out how to change certain behaviours

and many more we can share with each other.

To start at the beginning : Are words your friend or foe?

When you see a blank page or screen are you filled with fear or are you excited at the challenge.

Does writing words down help you more or in a different way to speaking them?

Everyone is welcome to contribute, first time posters , regulars, people who don't like writing , people who find they go the character limit for the post every time.

Write on

Quirky

PS writing in this context is same as typing , or using voice to text.

I want to look at how words can help you express your thoughts and emotions?

[Moonstruck]

Well well Quirky...fancy it taking this long to find this post of yours. Me? I could write under wet cement! I began my "journal" aged about 13.....(must have just read Diary of Anne Frank).....kept them up until during my marriage.....too busy with home and kids or had the need to write much in it then)...when my ex husband found the pile of them, read them and used them to taunt me, quote from etc. Considering I had written them in confidence, to myself only, in my youth made me feel terrible of course....so I burnt the pile of them!! All those memories.

Later in life I resumed writing and have another large pile of notebooks...for my eyes only....my son knows how expressively I can write...and reckons I am "sitting on a goldmine" and should edit them around a bit and publish them!! I agree it would be riveting reading...but I said he's welcome to them after I'm gone and can make a fortune out of them....

It's incredibly insightful to read back over time and see exactly what my thoughts, emotions and anguish was at that time...how things and situations evolved...moving forward, slipping back etc. It's all there on the page and from my heart...nothing dishonest or exaggerated...pure truth...and no one reads it, but me.

I am definitely a "writer" not a "phoner". When I begin ringing myself up for a chat..now that's a worry!!!

[Quercus]

I agree with Moon... I prefer to write than phone any day.

And I've burnt diaries and letters too. More to try erase the memories than anything.

As to arguments... I prefer them written. When hurtful words are put on paper we can't ignore them later. I can't ignore things I have written that have caused hurt. Or excuse them as "heat of the moment".

Like Mary said putting things in writing takes longer so for me that means I am more accountable to myself.

The forums are an example. I write here flaws on show. By recording my words publicly I make myself accountable... To ME. I can go back and check myself. Yes you did this. Yes you said that.

And Quirky. If writing take care is patronising then many of the posts on the forums must be patronising too 😂. We're always ending posts with please take care or take care of yourself. Is that patronising? I don't see it that way.

[Summer Rose]

Hi Quercus, Quirky and all

I think you have touched on an interesting topic about how, and if, written words on the forum can be considered patronising. I think misinterpretations can likely occur because sometimes we know very little about the person we are talking to.

As a mum in her 50s, I can see that some of my words and phrases could be received as patronising by another adult. It's not my intention, it's just my natural voice. It's an air of confidence, care and authority that I carry; whether that's right or wrong is a different story.

I think all readers attribute a tone to written messages. When we know the author I think we attribute a whole lot more and this can also lead to misinterpretations. For example, I can pretty much guarantee that I would react differently to the same written relationship advice received from a person on this forum and my mum. This is because I would make many assumptions about what mum is really saying, her tone and motives based on our past relationship. This is why I think it's hard to disguise or tone down anger when we're writing difficult messages to loved ones.

[quirkywords]

Hello all writers and readers,

Lici, I agree that letter writing is a special genre and we often write in letters things we would never say to a person. Thats why i sue the letter as a form of therapy and would never send them!

Moon,welcome to this thread. I too have thrown away old diaries but I think my writing is so bad no could read it anyway as I can't u nderstand what I ahve written!

If your posts on here are any indication of your journal writing I would be lining up to buy a copy!!

I hope you keep popping into this thread as I always enjoy your posts and company.

Nat, I would be cautious to go back and read some of my earlier posts . I often read things I have written and wonder did I really write that.

I like the idea of writing making us accountable.

I was just saying that even something like Take care can be misinterpreted by someone. Words have different meaning for different people.

Do you think that the letter as an art form will be lost because of the digital age of emails texts and abbreviations?

Are other forms of writing fading ?

Quirky

[Lici]

Morning quirky (And all),

That's a really interesting question! I think letter writing as in physical letters is dying because of email there's no doubt about that.

As far as "text talk" killing letter writing, I don't think it is. I think text talk is mostly used in instant messaging due to the age of Twitter but that email is seen as basically a letter where it has its own etiquette rules that are the same as letter writing and changes depending on who the email is for. (I could be wrong though, maybe kids write text talk no matter what these days?)

Unfortunately things die out. It's the way of the world. Typewriters gave way to computers, the quill gave way to pencils and pens. It's just the way our world is. I don't think this means that things die off completely though, they just get incorporated into the new technology. Physical letter writing may not be a thing anymore with the younger generation, but they definitely haven't stopped writing letters in the form of emails.

As to whether other forms of writing are fading, it's hard to say. Books are still popular. In fact the physical book is now popular again over things like kindle, so that form of writing isn't fading. If anything, I think writing is evolving. We get to write on forums such as these, we get to connect with people from all over the globe with words. To me, it's awe inspiring the way communication and writing has evolved with technology.

Hope you all have a good day!

Lici

[Moonstruck]

Dear Quirky and all.....don't know if you believe "no such thing as coincidences?."...I leave it to you to decide...re your topic of "writing"....you'll never guess what I came across in a drawer this morning....a Travel Diary..little book especially for that purpose...that I had recorded my overseas journey over 40 years ago!! after reading a few entries I was intrigued at who this young articulate girl could be.

the pages have the date and place, weather etc to record....and there are quite lengthy and expressive pieces from Brisbane Airport where I began...."Delhi"....."salzburg"...germany, London, Vienna....according to my younger self.....I had a wonderful time, consuming such beauty...I described Hampton Court Palace as one of the most extraordinarily beautiful places I had ever seen in my life!! (my Dad and I had had an interest in Henry 8th and his 6 wives and the old Tudor England days)

on another occasion I was writing.."lying in a field of clover and yellow daisies in Austria".......who WAS this person???? I am slowly going to go through the whole thing now...whoever this girl was...I miss her.

[quirkywords]

salutations to fellow wordy ones,

Lici,

I like this positive statement.

To me, it's awe inspiring the way communication and writing has evolved with technology.

That is so true. We often hear negative comments about the future of books and writing so it is good to read a positive slant.

Moon,

I do believe in coincidences. To answer your statement ".. ..whoever this girl was...I miss her.

I see her in your posts, in your love of quotations, in your wit, in your curiousity, in your knowledge , in your vivacity.

Another coincidence my dad loved history and we would go to movies together that were about royal history and my dad in a loud voice would complain when something happened on screen that was not historically accurate.

I had to explain to my dad it was a fictional movie and not an historical documentary.

I would have loved going on that trip. Did you go alone? Did you write any more detailed entries full of emotion and psychological insights.

Inspired by Moon

I am wondering if other people have found old journals, or letters that they wrote when they were younger or others wrote to them?

How did rereading them make you feel? What did you Learn?

Quirky.

[Lici]

Hi all 😊

Thanks quirky 😊 you're right, there is a lot of focus on the negatives when it comes to technology, but there's also so many positives to it as well!

In regards to your question, I don't know if I still have it somewhere, but I had a book full of poetry that I wrote when I was deeply depressed at 16. It was interesting to look back and read my words and how dark and deep they were for a teenager. It showed me how far I've come. I'm not very good at poetry anymore, which kind of makes me miss that creative part of myself, but I don't miss the dark spot I was in at that time.

I read a bunch of diaries that I had written at around the same time. It was interesting and amusing to read the problems and situations that I found so important back then. Some of them were very important (like being homeless) but the amount of times I wrote about some boy made me laugh.

Did I learn anything from reading it all? I'm not sure really. I know that I was going through a major depressive episode, but apart from that, I don't feel like I really learnt much from my current position with mental health. If anything I learnt that I was very confused, didn't know what was wrong with me, and that I was extremely strong to get through it without help.

Thanks for the questions in this thread quirky! They make for interesting reading and are great to ponder on!

Lici

[quirkywords]

Hello all,

Lici,

It is interesting reading ones writing from the past. Sometimes like Moon, we wonder who that person was who wrote those words. Sometimes we admire the courage and adventure of the person we were then or we cry over how sad and desperate we we were when we wrote in the journal.

Writing is so important to who we were, to who we are, and who we will be.

Quirky

[quirkywords]

welcome to anyone reading this thread.

I have been thinking about how some words can make us cry and other words can make us smile, especially in poetry.

Is there are poet or poem you go to when you are in a dark place?

Is it the words or the rhythm that touches your soul?

Quirky