Tips and Tricks for - self-care, resilience in the work place, supporting colleagues with mental health needs & managing vicarious trauma

[Kate850]

Hi all,

I've come across a range of challenges this year that has significantly impacted my mental health. I would like to know if anyone has any specific personal strategies or attitudes they adopt to help them deal with the following key challenges. I've asked a range of questions that might be answered when considering these challenges but course any extra comment or elaboration is welcomed.

- Self-care:
How do you self-identify when it is time to 'pull-back' at work and take some time out? How do you check-in with yourself?
What strategies do you build into your day to make sure you are in-touch with how you are feeling?

- Resilience:
How do you process and work through challenging situations with colleagues? (i.e. conflict at work, personality differences, politics, communication breakdown).
What attitudes, mantras, ethical values help you to 'carry on' and weather workplace demands?
How do you distance yourself from problems at work? Prevent yourself from taking it home with you?

- Supporting Colleagues with Mental Health Needs/Vicarious Trauma
When a colleague or client is experiencing a high degree of distress, how do you provide practical on-the-ground support without 'sinking with the ship'?
What strategies do you put in place to manage good rapport with colleagues whilst maintaining emotional boundaries? (i.e. not exposing yourself too much to other's personal disclosure/off-loading of psychological and social difficulties).

I work in the healthcare industry but I imagine these themes or issues are commonly experienced in a range of industries. Any additional resources, websites, training courses would also be welcomed if you know of any!

Thanks,

K

[MarkJT]

• Personality differences: I see this as a positive. Imagine how boring the world would be if we were all the same. Some people you will clash with just because they are so different to you. Those type of people will never be on your xmas card list so i tend to have as little as I need to with those people. I keep if completely professional, do what i have to do and get on with my job.
• Politics: I stay well out of it for the most part. With the current SSM survey, i have told my LGBTI mates that i am with them and voting yes to support and leave it at that. Not many more things will get people fired up more than politics. I don't think it is rude to excuse yourself if people are talking about it, unless you are interested in it. Then you can partake in the talk, but ensure that you keep yourself cool.
• Communication breakdown: I always find the best way is to acknowledge that there has been a breakdown and then backtrack to find the point that it happened, acknowledge that it occurred and correct it. Never try to cover the cracks, only causes more grief!

I promote my resilience by practicing mindfulness, being grateful and empathetic. If you follow these three points, you will strengthen your resilience. Every night before i go to sleep, i list the three things that went right for me that day and be grateful that they occurred.

Supporting Colleagues: Personally I have conversations with people who are struggling or even healthy and i give them a tiny bit of my story. I judge their reactions and you can generally tell whether or not they want to hear more or they start to ask questions.

This opens the door for a longer conversation which can be really good. You are showing them support by answering questions and they might get some education from your own mental health condition journey you are or have been on.

I also put in there that I am more than happy to talk about my journey and be very open about it. This was you are giving them the license to ask what ever they want to.

In the times that they clearly do not want to talk about it, sometimes I will just sit with them and not say much at all. Just knowing that someone is sitting with them is all it takes to make them feel better.

Judgement call at the time, that is what it boils down to.

Sorry for the looooooong postings and have a fair bit more to discuss if you would like to.

Again, great stuff for coming here and posting.

Mark.

[MarkJT]

Kate, my first post didn't go through for some reason - bugger!! Ok so will try and repeat.

First off, welcome to the forums - a very caring & protective place and without stigma so well done for coming here and posting.

As I dont know what mental health conditions you have, I substituted mine for yours and you may be able to interchange them.

Self Care: Really important this one, critical in fact.

You get to know yourself really well. For me, living with PTSD, anxiety and depression, i can tell you at any given time of the day where i am at.

If i am anxious, I stop what im doing, try and work out what it causing it and remedy it. If i dont know what it is, i acknowledge it and concentrate on my breathing. Long deep breaths. I also listen to some music and if i can, do some exercise.

I practice mindfulness as well. I dont know if you know about this but i recommend you start doing it. There is an app, "Smiling Mind" - download it and start. Really good for grounding yourself.

Diet - Remove as much sugar as you can. I know this is hard and I have not been able to do it as yet but have removed some of it.

Alcohol - I no longer drink it. Nothing wrong with having it moderately but to me it is a 1%'er that will help me.

Exercise - critical. Well established how good exercise is for mental health. Walk, jog, run, swim, ride, hike, gym...so many different ways to do it.

The first thing i do in the morning is self check. If im good, beauty but if im PTSD symptomatic, then i deal with it. Sometimes dealing with it is as simple as acknowledging that i am not feeling to good and today is going to be a hard day. Constant self evaluation throughout the day coupled with breathing techniques allows me to get through the day.

Resilience: Every night when i go to bed, I think of three things that went right for me that day and re-live them. I practice empathy, gratitude and mindfulness daily and once you start doing this, I have found that it is one of the factors that helped me get my resilience back and considering i once had none, i am pretty happy with that.

• Conflict at work: hard one but i do not worry about matters i have no control over. Sometimes you just have to accept what is happening and walk away.Not ideal but i call it a tactical retreat. Try and find what the cause of the conflict was and if you were at fault, apologise and correct it. If you were not at fault, as said above, if you cannot change the persons mind, I drop it and move on.

[Kate850]

Thanks Mark, much appreciated advice.