So you've been correctly diagnosed years ago, found the ideal treatment that could have included therapy, meds, exercises, meditation, spiritual discovery, better quality friends, a career change...even a tree change.
The problem, as I found out about 6 months ago, is going that final step- being happy. See, I'm now 63yo. I carried bipolar, anxiety, depression and dysthymia for 46 of those years without knowing it, the last 17 years battling to achieve some level of normality and acceptance of my disorders. But as I've never been a very happy person -how could I know how to be happy?
Happy by my definition with anyone with a MI entails-
- acceptance of their illness as (likely) lifelong
- Stablility of medication
- Our MI is no longer prominent on our minds, taken over by hobbies, sports or even relationship contentment
- Laughter and fun
mmm, laughter and fun? But, how do you have fun when you dont know how? You learn it!
Most of us have a natural sense of humour. Pursue it. For me that meant obtaining DVD's of Mr Bean, I love Lucy and Billy Connelly. I also purchased joke books. By watching these comedians my anxiety dropped. It wasnt long before the subject would dominate the bbq with friends. The contagious need to joke around overflowed between my wife and I. That happy state leads to a tickle or playful fun. Suddenly friends enjoyed their stay not burdened by topics of MI....in my desperate need for understanding.
We laugh together. What a change.
This for me is the final frontier of happiness in overcoming (not eliminating) MI. For you, struggling with your new diagnosis or with depression could not dream of this possibility. It will take time, many years in fact but laughter can enter your life if you persistently go through the processes to recovery.
Keep those psych visits, pursue the ideal meds dosage, allow the black dog to go through his visiting process then as he leaves then motivate yourself, change that full time job in stressful customer service for the variety of two part time jobs, rid your life of the toxic and dominating persons and ignore the stigma of MI. Give love.
Then you will be ready to introducing fun in your life. A long journey with a happy ending.
Laughter eventually, is the best medicine.
TonyWK
