Talking to your inner critic, can it be tamed?

[quirkywords]

Do you have an inner critic ? Have you ever tried to talk to your inner critic. This is what happened when I tried. In my Be yourself thread people asked about how I interviewed my inner critic. So here it is.

This is adapted from a writing exercise to interview your inner critic about one's writing. As my inner critic has an opinion all aspects of my life I decided to broaden the scope of the interview.

Me: I welcome (well I don't really) this opportunity to find out why you always need to have an opinion that is always negative about me and my life.

IC: I thought this was going to be a friendly interchange of ideas but there you go with your anger and hostile remarks. I do not see myself as negative but as helping you, because you do need help.

I am here to help you why can't you see that?

Me: So when I am trying to sleep and you tell me about all my mistakes, embarrassing moments, how does that help me?

IC: I thought while you are in bed you would have time to consider some of your past behaviours. This I feel will only help you to improve.

Me: If you are so helpful why do I feel so worthless, so sad, so ignorant when you are around? Do you really know how low I can feel when you are constantly telling me all my faults?

IC: You make yourself feel that way- I am merely pointing out the truth. It is not my problem that you are so weak.

Me: Maybe this was a bad idea you are never going to listen to me or understand me.

IC: Have you ever thought that maybe you shouldn't listen to me if I upset you so much.

Me How can I ignore you when you are so loud at times.

IC: See this is what I mean you are so weak. You have the power to ignore me, to silence me but all you do is whinge and complain.

Me: I am ending this interview. Enough is enough.

What would you say to your inner critic and what do you want to hear from your inner critic? Maybe you can have a go at interviewing your inner critic.

Quirky

[quirkywords]

Hello everyone reading and posting,

I hope you have at least one day or an hour or two when your inner critic is quiet.

Music, hope you are feeling better today. yes. Daydreams can be a distraction.

Quirky

[Chloe_M]

Hi quirky,

the critic is fairly quite today, but yesterday it was a strong presence. During one of my performances yesterday my foot developed a really bad cramp which didn't go away. I was dancing on pointe shoes and it was really painful. After I finished my inner critic was very loud and made me feel really bad. Told me I was no good. Made me feel crap as usual. Oh well. Will talk to psych today at appointment about ways of getting it to shut up.

Have a good day everyone

Chloe x

[quirkywords]

Hello all

Chloe, I am sorry you had cramp during your performance, that must have been painful.

I would have told my critic how would you have coped with a cramp and then gone and had a cup of tea!

Apart from the cramp . how did the performance go.

Hope your appointment goes well with psych and you get some useful tools for your mental health tool box.

Quirky

[Chloe_M]

Hi quirky,

yeah the cramp hurt, but apart from that I danced well.

It was actually my first appointment, I went to headspace and saw this youth clinician. She just asked me loads of questions about, well, everything. She was very nice.

She didn't give me strategies she just got to know me and why I'm here and what I'm experiencing. I will be seeing a psychologist on a regular basis at headspace soon.

Hope you have a good night,

chloe 🙂

[quirkywords]

Hello everyone,

Chloe, thanks for letting us know about your appointment. You sound quite positive and I am glad you had a chance for the clinician to get to know you and that you felt someone was listening to you. I think taking these steps will hopefully tame tour inner critic for a while.

Quirky

[Music_Freak]

I was doing quite well yesterday, had a productive day and critic was almost quiet...but today, the critic woke up with me at 3am, I'm amazed I actually got back to sleep at all.

Now it's almost 10am and I'm sitting at my laptop not even dressed yet, after dragging myself out of bed at 9. I did get a flu shot yesterday, but it can't be that, surely. I just have no fight in me today and I have a psychologist appointment in 3 hours and still have to do homework...

I just want to hide in bed and sleep the day away. Hopefully walking to the appointment in the rain helps clear my head a bit...

[quirkywords]

Music, do not be too harsh on yourself.

I often find after a shot I do feel a bit funny, so give yourself a break.

Small steps and you will make the appointment.

I hope it goes well

Quirky

[Ggrand]

Hello Quirky and everyone,

Last week my inner critic kept nagging me saying, how irresponsible, stupid, dumb I was for being so impulsive and listening to my negative thoughts and just taking off for over 650kilometres drive..

Since I've been back home, my inner critic has been more kind to me, I wanted to go for a walk today, my inner critic kept telling me not to be so stupid, what if I break down again and the same person or someone saw me again, but then I struggled with my inner critic and it shut up enough and I won.I went for my walk....I overpowered my inner critic and it felt good.

Round one...Goes to Grandy...yay..

Grandy

[quirkywords]

Hello everyone,

Grandy, 3 cheers for you, raspberries for the inner critic.

Thanks so much for sharing that with us.

I wish you had thrown your critic out of the car on your long trip.

Quirky

[Chloe_M]

You go girl! 💜