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Talking to your inner critic, can it be tamed?

Community Champion
Community Champion

Do you have an inner critic ? Have you ever tried to talk to your inner critic. This is what happened when I tried. In my Be yourself thread people asked about how I interviewed my inner critic. So here it is.

This is adapted from a writing exercise to interview your inner critic about one's writing. As my inner critic has an opinion all aspects of my life I decided to broaden the scope of the interview.

Me: I welcome (well I don't really) this opportunity to find out why you always need to have an opinion that is always negative about me and my life.

IC: I thought this was going to be a friendly interchange of ideas but there you go with your anger and hostile remarks. I do not see myself as negative but as helping you, because you do need help.

I am here to help you why can't you see that?

Me: So when I am trying to sleep and you tell me about all my mistakes, embarrassing moments, how does that help me?

IC: I thought while you are in bed you would have time to consider some of your past behaviours. This I feel will only help you to improve.

Me: If you are so helpful why do I feel so worthless, so sad, so ignorant when you are around? Do you really know how low I can feel when you are constantly telling me all my faults?

IC: You make yourself feel that way- I am merely pointing out the truth. It is not my problem that you are so weak.

Me: Maybe this was a bad idea you are never going to listen to me or understand me.

IC: Have you ever thought that maybe you shouldn't listen to me if I upset you so much.

Me How can I ignore you when you are so loud at times.

IC: See this is what I mean you are so weak. You have the power to ignore me, to silence me but all you do is whinge and complain.

Me: I am ending this interview. Enough is enough.

What would you say to your inner critic and what do you want to hear from your inner critic? Maybe you can have a go at interviewing your inner critic.


828 Replies 828

Thanks Quirky

i am always trying to improve myself. With the current covid situation though if lockdown gets extended much more though looks like it might even have to be cancelled

SN that would be sad but maybe you may get another chance if it was cancelled.

I admire you attitude.

Community Member
Thank you for your support and advice Quirky xox

I think people’s inner critic tends to come out in lockdown when we may see others busy baking, being creative, exercising. We may compare ourselves to others and feel a bit la y.

My inner critic nags me to do more I am doing what I can.

Community Member
My inner critic is comparing myself to others. These others are people who are younger than me and who seem to have made something of themselves. It totally disregards me and the things I have done, are doing and perhaps will do in the future.

Community Champion
Community Champion


thanks for your reply. Sorry it took me a while to see your reply.

I think sometimes we need to challenge our inner critic by saying I may not be as young as others but I have achieved alot.

Can you focus on your positives and try to ignore the inner negative voice?

Hello everyone

I hope 2022 is a hopeful year for everyone.

How is your inner voice, your inner critic , or whatever you call that negative voice that puts you down and doubts your efforts. Some people even give the voice a persons name.

When I find myself listening to my inner voice telling me what mess I have made, I start to think is this real, can I reword it, from you have made a mess, to I made a small mistake but I have learnt from that and I feel proud and confident.

Sometimes the inner critic runs me down and I take on the negativity but I am trying hard to silence the critic.

How are going in taming your inner critic. .?

Hello everyone,

I wonder if like me when you get unexpected criticism from family your inner critic wants to join in.

This usually happens to me but this time I found myself fighting back, trying to be assertive but mostly being emotional. Then later the inner critic was loudly telling me that my fami,y didn’t think I was a good parent and grandparent.

i am still sorting out my reactions and feel the complaints were unfair.
the inner critic is still there but I feel more indignant that the criticism from family was so unfair.
How do others cope in this situation. .?

Community Champion
Community Champion

Hello Quirky,

I am so sure my inner critic just loves to hate me....

Isn’t it strange how it lingers in the background of our minds..It’s in their 24/7 just waiting to spring upon us so quickly when something is said to hurt us...Were is our loving, caring inner critic at the time we need it most....it’s swallowed up by the mean, hurtful inner critic in us....

Do we even have a nice kind inner critic in us...Has anyone ever heard from their kind and caring, soul building inner critic....I wonder?

My kind thoughts, Dear Quirky and everyone..


Community Champion
Community Champion

Thanks Grandy for your post but Isish you didn’t have an inner critic,

For me all inner critics are negative one shompraisesznd encourages and supports is a kind coach, or a helpful counsellor.

posters have written here about an encouraging voice, a You can do it yes you can voice. Those kind voices coexist and I am hopeful one day I will hear one.