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Something is missing

Community Member

Despite having reach a point in life that many dream of ( no need to work for money, freedom to do whatever I choose ) Ive struggling to truly enjoy life and choose how to spend my days.

I struggle to experience happiness and  relax and embrace my new reality. Im not sure if its some kind of depression or something else.

Any insights on how to deal with this?

5 Replies 5

Community Champion
Community Champion

Dear SandraCh~


Welcome here to the Forum. It was a good move on your part as you get to read other people's perspectives. Sometimes one can be too close to something to see all the angles.


The first thing I'd say is not to worry.


You have now had a very big change in your life, going from someone who had a purpose - earn money - and structure -a job - in their life , now these huge life influences are no longer there.


It is only natural that one does not always slip easily into another life style - even if it was one you might have been looking forward to. You might even miss some parts of the old way of doing things.


Do you think it might be worth considering a new purpose - one you can enjoy or feel worthwhile - and a new structure in your life, at least for a while?


I don't know you well enough to make specific suggestions. It might be voluntary work for a cause that interests you, being a museum guide, amateur radio or anything at all.


Sometimes freedom can be best enjoyed and appreciated in the contexct of doing things.


What do you think?





Community Champion
Community Champion

Hello Dear SandraCh,


A very warm welcome to the forums,


I am happy for you that you haven’t really got any financial worries and the freedom to do whatever you want to do, but at the same time are saddened that your not enjoying all you’ve achieved……


I think, that even in your circumstances that life still needs some type of structure or routine…maybe settling  aside a couple of days volunteering yourself to help those less fortunate (like a charity shop), their are so many organisations that require volunteers to help them…..it might give you a feeling of purpose which in turn might help you feel a little more joy or happiness knowing that your helping others….not in a money kind of way…just your time….the other days your not volunteering, try to find things that you enjoy doing….and want to do….those are just my thoughts dear Sandra….I think what I mean is, if all of a sudden you’ve stopped working, which would have filled your days with company and kept your mind busy, it would be hard to just completely stop all that…a couple of day of volunteering will give you a couple of days with other volunteers and keep your mind busy…..


My kindest thoughts Dear Sandra with my care..


Community Member

Thank you so much for such kind words.

Yes a new definition of purpose is what Im looking for. Ive became a mom recently as well and it sounded perfect to have all the tile in the world to be with my child.

So, I thought that was going to be enough.

My partner wants me to enjoy our “early retired” life buy again I still don’t seem to be able to.

Community Champion
Community Champion

Dear Sandra,


Congratulations on your new baby, that must be so beautiful and exciting….for you and your partner….


Looks like volunteering is out for a while….caring for a baby takes up a lot of time, not to mention energy as well….


Do you have something that your passionate about, that you might like to learn more about…an internet course maybe?… We need direction in our lives, something to aim for…to head towards….an achievement I suppose we could call it….something to nurture our brains…

Strange isn’t it, that many people think that if you’re financially secure you are automatically happy, unfortunately it doesn’t always work that way….


Hugs lovely Sandra…




Community Champion
Community Champion

Dear SandraCH~

I'd like to join Grandy in wishing you well with the new baby. As Grandy says it will take up an awful lot of your time, and hopefully that of your partner too.


For many being a mum is a full-time satisfying life and that's fine. For others such as yourself something more is needed. That's fine too. It does no mean any less love for the child, just that  another purpose fills in a gap as well. Some people never retire.


I think Grandy is also right that you probably may have to do home based things, unless you  partner is going to be a home dad too.


There was a time I could not leave the house and practiced electronic keyboard as an outlet. I never got very good but could stumble though a waltz or two. Ironically the keyboard cost next to nothing at a thrift shop but the music was quite expensive.