Merry and Bright or Bah Humbug, how do you feel about the holidays?

[Summer Rose]

As the old saying goes, Christmas comes but once a year, and judging by my trip to the mall today it has well and truly arrived. Crowds of shoppers, bustling about, looking for the perfect gift. Not all of us here on the forum celebrate Christmas but I doubt than any of us can ignore it.

The advertisers tell us this is the best time of the year. A chance to enjoy the good things in life, spend time with the family and generally eat, drink and be merry. But this simply isn't the case for everyone. The holiday and its associated activities (e.g. shopping, cooking, travelling, etc) triggers stress, sadness and depression for a lot of people. I'm one of them.

Don't get me wrong, I love my husband, kids and Australian family and friends and I will no doubt enjoy the holidays. But for me, Christmas is always tinged with a hefty dose of sadness, which I carry inside and try to hide. This is because my mum, my sister and her family and all of my extended family live overseas. I've lived in Australia for some 30 years and you'd think I'd be used to this by now but I'm not.

So, I'm wondering how Christmas affects you? Are you looking forward to the holiday, feeling stressed or feeling left out because it's not something you participate in? What are your strategies for protecting your mental health this festive season?

[GoodWitch]

It's ok Summer Rose, I didn't actually expect a response. I know everyone is busy and I was really just venting I guess. Yesterday was a nice day, the weather really held up for us, not to hot or rainy. Kids had a great time & we are going to a BBQ with friends this afternoon. All is good! I just wish I didn't feel this constant anxiety in my gut, and the feeling like I want to cry all the time. I am so fortunate to have all I do. I'm trying to focus on that and just get on with it all.

Hope your Christmas and everyone else's was good.

xo

GW

[asdff]

GoodWitch I did cry on Christmas Day. Oh yay me for making an idiot of myself yet again. As we were driving to the next Christmas Day destination I was thinking hubby would be better off married to someone else.

[GoodWitch]

I'm sorry you struggled yesterday asdff. As you can see from this thread, you are not alone. Being emotional doesn't mean you are a fool, though. Just human.

I hope you are having a better day today xo

GW

[Summer Rose]

Hi BBQ

Thank you so much for your kind thoughts and support. You have a wonderful spirit and it shines through in your words.

I really like your approach to Christmas and life. You said, "Giving of myself to others in need without expecting anything back is my grestest joy Not just at xmas but All Year Round." In my world these are words to live by. Thank you for the timely reminder. I will also look for your post on Geoff's thread.

Thank you for the heads up. Oh, and nice to meet you!

[Summer Rose]

Hi Lee

Thank you for showing you care about everyone on this thread. We all have different issues but we share a unique bond, and this space allows us to care for each other in a way that just doesn't happen in real life.

We can vent, talk, cry or yell at the universe and it's okay because we know someone will come along who undetstands. It's a beautiful thing in a tough world.

Kind thoughts to you

[Summer Rose]

Hi GoodWitch

Thanks for being generous and cutting me some slack. I am so glad that the day went well for you and I hope you have fun today too. You are stronger than you think.

All the best my friend

[Summer Rose]

Hi asdff

I am sending you a hug.

I want you to know that crying is okay. You survived and made it through and that's what counts. You hang in there.

Kind thoughts to you

[asdff]

Thanks Summer Rose, you are a beautiful soul. I can tell that just through your writing.

[Quercus]

Hi everyone,

Christmas is done now just my nemesis new years to get through and life returns to somewhat normal.

Just wanted to say to asdff you're not alone. Christmas is such a vulnerable time and there are triggers everywhere. I started crying at my parents in law's house watching a kids movie of all things. I think at times the stress and anxiety just builds and outbursts are fairly normal.

Feeling like hubby wants me to be better than I am is a stress here too. But I tell myself right now is not the time to force myself to face this. I'm tired and stressed. Nothing wrong with giving ourselves a break till everything quiets down.

[Summer Rose]

Hi Quercus, Asdff and all

I think Quercus has really hit the nail on the head. Nothing wrong with giving ourselves a break till everything quiets down. Exactly.

Isn't it strange that sometimes we can be kinder and make more allowances for others than we can for ourselves? After all we've been through this Christmas, now is the time for self care. Self love if you can do it.

There is a fantastic long running thread on the forum called "Do you like yourself ..." offered by Blond Guy (Paul). Really worth having a look.

On the topic of self care, the University of Melbourne has just published a list of movies supposedly "good for the soul" at this time of year. The list includes, Little Miss Sunshine, Whale Rider, Paper Planes, Eddie the Eagle, Kedi, A Silent Voice, Sing Street, Paddington 2 and Wonder.

Maybe it's time to put our feet up and escape for awhile?