Medication is a whirlpool

[white knight]

My wife has had depression most of her 50 years. When down she sleeps and is less motivated than normal.

I have bipolar 2, dysthymia (another form of depression) and depression. My depression is not like my wife's type. I fall into sadness and an overwhelming feeling of needing to escape from the world....no wallet, no food, no common sense. Into the bush I'd go.

My wife and I married 4 years ago but we have known each other for 28 years now. Since marriage we have tried many medications and we have wanted to throw them away at times. Each time we have stopped taking them we soon have meltdowns. Then the arguments start and the hours of separation.

This occured so often that for the sake of a/ personal safety and b/ to contain our "escaping" desires, we would make a rule that we didnt leave the property and the other person wouldnt hound the other....just leave them be. A good rule.

But we have identified the effect of medication. That so much experimentation has found that we NEED it. That we are not in a position to self "UNMEDICATE". THAT TO UNMEDICATE LEADS TO DISASTER.

The metaphor I came up with just today when answering another post is- like we are holding hands at the side of a whirlpool with the current (our illnesses) rushing past us. The walls of the whirlpool we grasp onto is the medication.  When we let go we are pulled towards the centre of the whirlpool and we cant maintain holding hands. As we are sucked around and down we lose sight of each other. Only when we realise that our choice of stopping taking our meds caused this state do we restart our medication and return to the rim of the pool.

Sufferers and our partners are not qualified to alter medication prescribed by a doctor. There are reasons for that. Medication isnt meant to be stopped and started when you like. Stability in your life and your relationships will come when you accept that medication should not be stopped at will without doctors guidance and advice. i.e. the current becomes less turbulent.

When owning a car you get a service say every 20,000 kms. When 20,000kms comes around since the last service do you decide....nope, I wont replace the oil,  dont worry about topping up the coolant and I dont care if the ball joints arent greased.

The car wont last long. It would have a breakdown....

Hang onto the rim of your whirlpool so you have a firm grip of the hands of your loved ones. Letting go...isnt worth the heartbreak  and the breakdown.

Tony   WK

[HA1]

Hi all

What a nice and warm thread! It covers all my dreams for the future; acreage in the country, peace and serenity, working the land ....

thanks 🙂

K

[Doolhof]

HI White Knight,

Thanks for an inspirational reply! I do have several hobbies that I enjoy, I just need to make the time to do them!

I spoke with my husband about my idea for a caravan or even a tent and he was not too enthusiastic. Guess it is not his passion or his need to have a space of his own. Actually he already has that...... a man cave in half of the huge shed we have!

I might start looking for a tent and tell him of all the benefits that will go with me having a little special place of my own!

I'm thinking I could even set up my paints in a tent and not have to pack them away all of the time. That way I would be more enthusiastic about painting once more!

My Dad had suggested a lining for the dam as well, only problem is we have so little rain here, it would be full of leaves and bark before the rains come! Ha. Ha.

The idea of a blow up canoe sounds like fun to me. We are about a half hour drive from the River Murray. There is a creek on Kangaroo Island where I grew up which I have always wanted to paddle up.

The thing is to find a balance in life between work, rest and play. When you are working it is not always an easy thing! But even a short period of time doing something you enjoy is better than having no time at all!

Cheers for now from Mrs. Dools

[Doolhof]

Hi Beltane,

I hope you are able to find some balance with your work, travelling, home life and hobbies. Do you listen to some of your favourite music while you are travelling? Do you drive or do you use some other form of transport?

Once upon a time I used to catch a bus to work and started to crochet a blanket while on the bus. A lady used to sit next to me quite often and in the winter she would share my blanket for warmth on the bus as it grew larger.

I try to do as much of my housework as I can during the week so I have the weekend free. I realise that is a bit hard to do when you already have such a long day!

I really do hope you can find a balance!

I'm going to make some enquiries about tents! It seems a caravan is out of our financial reach at present!

Cheers for now from Mrs. Dools

[HA1]

Hello Mrs Dools

I do like the idea of setting up a space for yourself.  I have done that and, for now, it represents my little escape when I need it - it is good until something better comes around.

Why not look at putting up a small shed instead of a tent?  An option maybe.   Then you can furnish it and paint it anyway you like. Could try scouring for secondhand material?  Anyway, just a thought.

K

[white knight]

Hi Mrs Dools,

To camp on a budget is a challenge that could be taen as a real positive. An achievement.

If doing that I'd do this- buy Camps Australian latest edition for around $65. A tent $30 (two man) a blow up mattress and other items.

Find your free camping spot.   Tony WK

[Beltane]

Hey mrs Dools, the tent might be a nice temporary measure on the way to the Big Dream of the caravan. AS someone who was in Scout for a long time, I would highly recommend you do your research. You'd probably be better off with a more old fashioned calico tent then a newer dome tent.

Heres some ideas... you'd want to put it up on a platform of some kind, even just some of those wood pallets. Maybe you can convince your hubby to help you build a wooden platform and water proof it. It only has to lift your tent 10cm off the ground. This will mean 1. it wont flood every time it rains and 2. the ground will get a chance to air and wont turn into a slushpool of mud. Its is really important to ensure the ground is getting air. If you put the tent straight on the ground, you'd have to lift up half the tent off the ground for a few hours each day. You'd also have to move it every few days. So the pallet bed might be the way to go.
Your hubby might even agree to help you build a little roof over the top of it too- just for that extra bit of rain and weather protection. Hell, even a good-quality tarp strung up on poles would be enough just to protect it.

It would certainly fun to set your paints up in it, or decorate it as you like. Winter might be rather cold in it, so be prepared to rug up nice and warm.


And about my job...  have to drive to it, there is no reliable pubic transport to take me there in a decent time- i'd end up switching services multiple times. I've got nice music to listen to, and i'm gradually getting the hang of which exact route is the quickest and least traffic-filled. Its just that its so easy for there to be an accident or something that would stall me a lot. Traffic causes me anxiety, as does that need to "get to the loo" if i'm stuck in traffic.

But its a wonderful place to work and my dream job so i'll make it work.

I talk all the time to my partner about it, luckily hes on board with the whole idea of living on land in the country. phew! because i just cant live in the city or suburbia, its just not me. i want land, and chickens for eggs, and lots of room to myself. Its lovely to hang on to the dreams...

[Doolhof]

Hi Beltane, Hideaway and White Knight,

Thanks to you all for your wonderful suggestions. I had wondered about what to do under a fairly permanent tent, so thanks for that Beltane.

Speaking of tents. I remember going camping once with a boyfriend. We had a two man tent but forgot the poles and the pegs! It was hilarious. We had the guide ropes connected to the tent so tied them to trees and used stones inside the tent in place of the pegs!

I like the idea of a shed as well, it could have many uses. I would have to check with our council to see what size we could have without needing planning permission. I have been checking them out in the hardware catalogues.

It can be exceptionally windy here, so a tent would have to be in a semi protected area. We were in a caravan park in Melbourne during a storm and saw some ones tent being ripped out of the ground and blown all over the place. Maybe a shed would be best!

It is a boiling hot day here in SA so I have been down to the chook shed hosing down the chooks. I also gave the canaries a bit of a spray. I can't really bring the chooks inside the house to relive them from the heat! My husband would have a fit, so would the cat. Ha. Ha.

I really am enjoying this lovely, friendly, cheerful post!

Cheers for now from Mrs. Dools

Oh yer Beltane, the answer to needing the loo in traffic is Tena Ladies. Ha. Ha.

[Beltane]

Tena Ladies?!?! Oh goodness! Well let's hope there's some more option so before we resort to that! Ha ha ha ha ha!

im sure you could get yourself a nice garden shed. not sure if you're planning somewhere you can sleep in overnight or just a retreat for during the day. I wouldn't abt to stay in a shed, but then again, I've only ever seen those dirty garden sheds dull of old garden tools and spiders. Your shed wouldn't be like that, because it wouldn't be for garden tools, it'd be for  lovely things like your paints etc. if you sprayed it with bug spray/ set up some Mortein you'd keep the spiders out, and you could hang colourful fabric on the walls and roof to brighten it up, or decorate it any way you'd like. Just do your research again about how waterproof it will be, you'd don't want to get a cheap one that will leak!

im liking this thread, it's  lovely positive thread! 

My partner and I are currently talking about saving half our wages so we can move out in a few months! We're thinking we'll get a rentsl place on the outskirts of melbourne, whcih is roughly where we are now. The dream is to buy the home in the country of course.

exciting times!!! Keep this thread going, it's a nice one!

[Doolhof]

Hi Beltane,

Okay, let's hope you don't need the Tena ladies for decades yet! Ha. Ha. When my stress was really bad, I couldn't drive for more than 1/2 an hour without needing a toilet! So a little assistance was very helpful to me!

Now I'm not so stressed due to my new tablets, that isn't such an issue!

Regarding the shed, I am going to have to sell it to my husband as a wonderful idea. I can tell him that if I decide I no longer need it as a retreat he can use it for the mower and other bits and pieces!

My idea is to have it lined with a cement floor. I like the idea of hanging material on the walls. I could have a fold out bed in there and plenty of room for my paints as well.

I like to disappear for a weekend and next weekend will be going to a beach side caravan park to stay in a cabin for the weekend.

I hope you and your partner are able to live your dream as well. Maybe you could drive around and see what areas would suit you best to move to. It could be something you do on the weekends.

Check out the various areas and see what facilities are there. Then you will have a good idea of what is around you.

All the best with your dreams, from Mrs. Dools

[white knight]

Hi all

I recently began to have double vision and one eye began to close. I went to my GP and was advised that one medication could be too strong so he advised me to lower the dose. Great work GP! the double vision ceased. I suppose it was akin to an indicator that I was on a dose too high for my illness.

He also told me that the particular medication I lowered will take a couple of weeks to take effect, but alas, only two days my vision returned to normal. 

It proved to me without doubt that seeking advice from your GP is essential to good mental health.

TonyWK