We all try, but how many of us with a mental issue can accurately gauge if we are well or the seriousness of our problem.? After all, our problems affect others doesn't it?
Are our partners/carers the better judge of our wellness?
I'd suggest they are with a proviso (a little on that later).
Let's take moods from the up and down bipolar disorder. When I am in a bad mood I feel angry at something or someone. To another person its a bad mood, an extreme of what would be classed as normal reaction. To me its none if that. Its something I'm angry about. Who is effected by the mood? My partner not I. In all honesty I don't feel my moods are extreme but too many people give me feedback so I can't deny it. But you can understand the struggle within. To believe others about your behaviour you think isn't extreme. Its a tough call. And I constantly question my own actions and words.
One exception with this blind faith of others account, is the alterior motive. I had a partner once that used my moods as a lever to justify her side of arguments. It seemed that possessing bad moods meant you forgave any right to disagree with opinion. Be aware if this for although extreme behaviour is all part if the bipolar package, you should not resign your rights to opinion.
We that need to jump daily hurdles in our quest for stability and happiness and crave for empathy from others should realise that our partners and carers need empathy also. It must be so hard for them to keep convincing us we are not being tolerable, easy going or fun. All the while we go about our life with no thought of how difficult it is for them.
Insight into our own Illness is not a given. Some don't have it. If you have insight you are one if the lucky ones. If you have empathy towards others for the tolerance they need to constantly judge our mood then you have extended yourself to be considerate and have placed much faith in your carer.
And that is a good goal, for you are returning effort. You are in fact a team.
It is not likely we can step in others shoes and see us from their position....hence the level of faith needed.
In most cases carers are better observers of our behaviour.
What do you think?
Tony WK
