I’m worried about my eating

[arimadik13]

I’ve really struggled with body image issues since I was about 9. I always had a strong and athletic figure as a kid, and when I entered my teens I had curves much before my peers but was still a healthy weight and size (if anything I was leaning toward under weight). I have always been self conscious and had a relationship with food that involved a lot of guilt. I put on weight last year (10kg) and began a starvation diet not long ago, and ended up losing the weight. I became vegetarian/gluten free/dairy free and wouldn’t eat more than 600 calories per day. Even eating at all would give me huge feelings of guilt and I would cry uncontrollably because I felt so bad about putting anything in my body. It has now turned into something I can’t stop. I thought once I lost the weight I could get out of that mindset but it’s still gripping me. This is exacerbated by family telling me how bad I looked with the extra weight, and how much better I look now. I don’t feel like I can talk to anyone in my life about it and am really at a loss for what to do. My mother has also always had bad body image issues and has almost encouraged them in me. She is also trying to lose weight and it’s like she almost sees it as a competition. She got mad about family commenting about my weight and now isn’t being very nice to me. It’s just making things worse. I feel so alone and trapped in my head. Does anyone have any suggestions.

[white knight]

Hi, welcome

Well being overweight will hurt your self esteem. Diets, starvations diets do not work, period. What does?

I'm 63yo and been on many diets also meals provided by a major food provider. Here is what I did last year that saw me lose 15kg in 4 months

- no potatoes, excess sugar, bread (use wraps instead), deep fried food and pasta. Limit rice. More walking

Now, lets talk realistically. You wont be able to maintain any diet. That is fact so, when you get tired of the diet reward your excess weight loss to reverting to your normal eating patterns for one week then back on that diet!.

Finally, acceptance. Our genes can determine our build. I don't believe the BMI ratings, I don't even get weighed in the Dr's surgery, I refuse. One doctor weighed me when I was 130kg. I sat down, he told me to lose weight and asked him if he would weigh himself, after coaxing he did and was 3kg heavier than I. I told him to lose some weight.

Skinny people wont understand and they are always offering opinions. Not fair at all.

So, while you are on any diet you are trying, that's good and that's enough. Be proud and accept you are never going to be model material but you can be beautiful or handsome depending on gender.

The most important thing for all of us is to seek moderation in everything we do. moderate diet, moderate exercise, moderate attitude. Try not to become obsessed. Be positive and happy.

tonyWK

[Ebi]

Hi arimadik,

I would like to respectfully offer an alternative view to Tony. It sounds like you're not happy with the dieting and feel that your relationship to food and your body image is not how you want it to be. Is that right? And you find that the responses from your family, especially your mother, are not helping you to make the changes to your eating the way you would like. I wonder if you might like to talk to your GP and get a check up to see whether you are on track for being a healthy weight or not? And also, your GP might discuss with you the option of taking to a psychologist to help with your difficult feelings about your body image and guilt in relation to eating. Would your family help you to see your GP about this, do you think?

It sounds like having some extra support to work out what is right for you and your health would be good, given that you're not happy with your family's responses. I think it's great that you are reaching out for help.

Thinking of you, Ebi