I am a person of worth because...

Guest_1055 · ‎17-11-2015

From reading other peoples posts, so many of us feel or thing we are worthless myself included.. To tell you the truth, I am sick of believing that lie. That sneaky little lie, that causes great crippling within us.

And I am thinking that most of us believe or base our worth on:

- what people say about us, like people that say we are worthless

-what the media, tv, and movies may portray

-whether we have lots of money or not

- the type of work we do or do not do

- whether we are highly educated or not

- what we physically look like

- whether we are ignored, neglected. ( yeah this one fits me)

- whether we are married or not

-whether we have friends, or we don't have friends

And there is most likely more reasons that we are trying to get our worth from. And I don't think we have to actually try, it sort of sink into us. This sneaky lie.

I think, and I would be interested to know other people's thoughts. We have to base our worth on something that never changes. That is always there. So here is some things to thing about.

I am a person of worth because:

I AM RARE

There is only one of me in the whole population on this earth, this fact never changes. A rare thing is very valuable, priceless. Do you agree? So we must be of some worth if we are so priceless.

Anyway that's it

With love xxx

Guest_1055 · ‎16-01-2016

Hey Scotchfinger

I am now lying here on top of the bed, wondering if what I said to you was just plain dumb?

And what sort of work did you do, and what is the name of your dog?

Shelley xx

Scotchfinger · ‎16-01-2016

no not dumb shelley, not dumb at all.

I don't want to risk going off topic by answering your other questions shelley.

have a nice rest.

Guest_4987 · ‎16-01-2016

Hi Shelley,

Read through all the posts on this thread and can relate to plenty that has been said.

There are so many people struggling out there, i too am one that finds life so hard sometimes and i wonder if things will ever get better!

I am very emotional at the moment it's been a big day for me working on the land,being in this state is a big trigger for my depression and the truth be known things do get better if i allow them to.

I have struggled my way through life since i was 13 and now i'am a hell of a lot older and yes there has been some rough times and yes there has been some good times but you know what i'am still here and hey you know what the good times may just be around the corner that's what keeps me going.

As i've read, we all are unique in our own way thats what makes us human it's such a pity that so many don't see us that way, they judge us for no particular reason but just to make themselves feel they are more than!

I know now when my life became complicated, I spent 40 years keeping it within trying to deal with it in the only way available at the time and with no guidance it was not the best choice, my mother was a single mum,she handed me over to my grandmother as a child I had no childhood memories of her, i only remember my father after i was 16 and saw him twice till i was 18, at thirteen my cousin assaulted me as a young boy so now you may see why i feel like i do…

The upside to all i have shared here today is that i know i am person of worth i am trustworthy,hard working,not judgmental,kind, gentle,a good friend even though i'am no brain don't have much cash, but i do get buy and thats the main thing.

Sorry for dumping my stuff on you all, my point is we are all worth a great deal just some don't see it and thats there thing, so please keep telling yourself you are worth it as well all are.

Wayne.

Moonstruck · ‎18-01-2016

In reply to Scotchfinger....no, sorry to disappoint you...I'm not a gorgeous model-type...never was a model. The thing I happened to be good at...(still am actually...I must take it up again) had to be carried out in front of others...drawing attention to oneself was exactly the objective...and couldn't be avoided.

(which my poor mother had been terrified of and tried to protect her children from).

In reading some of your posts...I am still not quite sure what is actually troubling you in life......if anything....it's been fun meeting you though........(thanks for telling me how to post a photo on here...I will get around to it...I am a dreadful procrastinator)

Scotchfinger · ‎18-01-2016

...I am still not quite sure what is actually troubling you in life-(Moonstruck)

Neither am I.

I could post you a ruthlessly honest confession of my past, but no I don't think it appropriate.

let us see , what troubles me...?

- a fear of people, some people in particular. It's a nasty form of social anxiety, where I tend to think the worst of others and how they might view me.

-not near enough courage, persistence, determination, humility, success,

-performance anxiety, severe. To the point I just can't give a speech without shaking hands, arms, nervous tics, trembling voice. Also applies to performing anything in front of someone else. paralysed with fear. So if the boss is over my shoulder, I am absolutely hopeless.

-fear of getting old and more useless with no money. Oh and a painful death of course.

-fear I won't pass some spiritual assessment at the end

Moonstruck · ‎18-01-2016

Thanks for that Scotchfinger....I am frightened of people too - but, without giving too much away about myself and how I've spent a lot of my life....your third from last fear...is actually my comfort zone! that doesn't make me more courageous than you, or anyone else though...because when in that position, I was pretending to be someone else you see....so perhaps that doesn't count.

I am frightened sometimes of making phone calls (except with people I am really close to) scared I am ringing at a bad time, interrupting something important, ringing for something trivial etc.

I am almost relieved when they aren't home and don't answer the phone.

I am a writer, not a phoner...would much prefer communicating by email or leaving a note in their letterbox...anything but phoning! I don't think I'm important enough to encroach on their time you see...or something....screwed up aren't I?

Re your "social anxiety..how others might view you"..have you tried being "a good listener?" - keeping eye contact and giving the other person your full attention, appearing to be 100% interested in what they're saying - as if they're the most fascinating person in the room?.......they'll think you're a Terrific Person!!

On the other hand, you could be stuck with an infuriating bore for hours and won't be able to get rid of them - that's the risk you take!

We have nothing to fear but fear itself!! (I forgot who said that...do you know?)

Scotchfinger · ‎18-01-2016

"..have you tried being "a good listener?" - keeping eye contact and giving the other person your full attention, appearing to be 100% interested in what they're saying - as if they're the most fascinating person in the room?.......they'll think you're a Terrific Person!! Moonstruck

There were more than a few interesting points you made. I'll choose the one above for starters.

I know I'm not naturally a good listener but sometimes if I make the effort can be surprisingly good at it. Depends how interested I am in the subject. But what I found in my last workplace, there was a lot of down time, and I would be stuck with different colleagues, trying to pass the time making conversation. Problem is I often came across absolute self-absorbed talkaholics who showed little or no interest in me, except any vital information, they could use against me later as gossip. My conclusion? Don't let aggressive people bore you to tears. Walk away.

That is a sad reflection in retrospect because there were some very decent people I worked with. Just seems one of the reasons I left was because of the lack of authenticity in an office. People often showing their worst behaviour. (we really didn't have much work to do believe it or not which was the root of the problem.

Guest_1055 · ‎22-01-2016

Hey Wayne

I have read your post. And it made me feel sad. Because I hate the thought of you as a young boy going through that awful thing. It truly breaks my heart. I wish I could erase it from your memory or something. I'm so so sorry Wayne. I am not sure what else to say about it. But I do deeply care about you.

You are right about you being hard working and gentle, I see you like that as well.

Hope you are OK today Wayne as I have not seen you around the BB forums much lately. Thank you for the big hug you gave me the other day, I cannot remember when it was..... I just remember the feeling of receiving a special hug from you. So I give you one in return in case you are needing or wanting one. I miss you..

With love

Shelley xx

fishes · ‎25-01-2016

Scotchfinger,i have read your posts and you reminded me of my family.my sisters and I grew up believing we were second class maybe even third. our father was an alcho and poor mum just gave up and we raised ourselves. Self worth? didn't have any .spent my childhood making excuses for my self. left school because I couldn't stand being the one in the ratty uniform with the pleats in my skirt ironed all the way through to holes. This is back in the seventies and life was tough for the poor.so I ended up married at sixteen and with two babies at eighteen. a runaway wife at nineteen with a baby under each arm and the black eyes ect.. life got a lot better after that. but self worth? still looking.still trying to forgive my parents,and amazed at how well my two turned out. my second husband had a lot to do with that though.