How to take care of myself?

[diamondgirl85]

I'm 38 and the title sounds so lame. But I feel like I don't know how to take care of myself. I make sure our kids (twins and a singleton) are fed, dressed and off to school or daycare, and when I get home all I want to do is sleep. I am constantly exhausted. Tired all the time. I've never had an iron issue, like ever. My house is a mess (I know people will say the housework can wait, but I honestly HATE living in a messy home - it makes me feel so much worse). I've been hitting the junk food and soft drink so hard in recent months. My MIL also passed recently and now I'm having major anxiety about studying and going back to work after being a stay at home mum for the last 8 years. I'm so used to being at home. I've gained 15-20kgs since our youngest was born 19 months ago. I'm just so lost and deflated and I hate that my kids see me like this every day. For context we live an hour outside Toowoomba so a gym membership isn't feasible with the whole cost of living crisis. I have next to no Mum friends as some have either moved away or others have gone back to work and I don't even see them on the school run anymore. My husband works for himself and he's very supportive but even he doesn't understand how my head works sometimes.

[Sophie_M]

Hi diamondgirl85,

Welcome to the forums and thank you so much for sharing how you've been feeling, we're sure our community will be able to relate and provide some insight. It sounds like you've been under alot of stress at the moment, we know how difficult it can be to balance looking after little ones while trying to keep a house on track, it's no easy task so it's understanable you are feeling exhausted.

Please know that you are not alone with these feelings, we are always here to listen if you are feeling overwhelmed and would like some support. The Beyond Blue Support Line is here for you 24/7 on 1300 22 4636, or online. It’s ok to reach out when you’re feeling anxious or upset, they can talk you through some ways to find a bit of calm, and then help you to figure out some options for further support. 

We hope you are able to share how you've been feeling, when we are overwhelmed sometimes it can help to open up to those around us. Maybe it would be worth having a conversation with your husband about how he may be able to help out more in the short-term so you can have some time to recharge and engage in some self-care. We've attached a resource we thought might be helpful, our website has some stories and tips that can be helpful: It can be really good to reflect on why we might be feeling how we’re feeling. Maybe having a look at other’s experiences of self-criticism and negative thinking might be useful. There’s an article on that topic on the Beyond Blue site, here: When your inner critic is giving you a tough time.

Thank you again for sharing, we hope you look after yourself during this tough time and please know you can reach out anytime. Feel free to update this thread with how you are going.

Kind Regards,

Sophie M