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Feeling 'too far gone'.

Community Member

How do you deal with feeling like you are 'too far gone'? I have become very overweight over the past 12 months, and do not look like my 'usual' self at all. Not only do I look heavier, but I look unhealthily bloated and 'puffy'. Sometimes it feels easier to except my current state and give into the relief from food, than to get back on track. I feel like any 'physical' progress will take months. I also feel unconfident leaving the house. 

2 Replies 2

Community Champion
Community Champion

Dear MissRen~

Welcome here to the forum. sometimes it can help to hear others, so wise of you to post.


I guess there are too things, the first getting "the relief from food".  This is a pretty common thing, it is very hard to talk oneself out of it at the time, there is both the attraction, distraction and the 'why bother to try'  plus hopeless feelings and habits to overcome.


 Do you  have any idea what has happened to change things over the last 12 months?


The other thing is it does very much appear hard to change those habits and be as you were before, and I'd strongly suggest if you have not already done so to do two things , first seek medical advice and set out in a long consultation what has been happening to you and how you feel


The second thing is to contact the people who are most used ot coping with this situation, The Butterfly Foundation (1800 33 4673). The have councilors, web chat and email and are very helpful and easy to speak to.


With assistance and advice things are not nearly as hard as the might seem


It would be great if you felt like coming back and talking here some more among those that can relate.




Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Hello Miss Ren

Thank you for posting. It's not easy telling anyone how you feel & then post to any forum. This forum is full of good people who care & understand that the difficulties we face are not easy or simple things to 'just get over'.

Indeed, the weight gain over the last year could be the result of a medical condition, so firstly, as Croix suggests, see your GP, for a long consultation, & explain what you have been experiencing for the last year, & maybe going further back than that, because maybe, there is a physical reason behind your weight gain.

From there, your GP can advise you what the next step could be for you.

However, whatever the cause for being overweight is, it can cause you to feel it's 'too hard' & I understand well how that feels, because it has taken a long time & a lot of effort to get my own unhealthy body into some sort of healthy shape again.... if it ever was 'healthy'. The last year has been so focused on my eating healthier than ever, exercising like never before, gritting my teeth & pushing on even while I feel it is too hard & I'm getting nowhere.

I hadn't cared about myself at all. Then I had a big health scare & a warning about my future if I don't get serious. The truth hit home. No-one can do this for me , but me. If I am not going to be important to myself, I will be in for a miserable future. Do I want that?

My new body shape felt awful, & I could hardly move my arms. I hated how I felt & sometimes cried to realise how unprepared I was for the rest of my life.

I know, as I've worked, I am feeling improvements in how I feel about myself. Discovering I can do things to help myeself has helped me feel emotionally stronger, as my body began to feel stronger.

I got advice. I slowly changed what I was choosing to eat, & slowly introduced exercise into my days, more days of the week than not. With help & support I've been slowly feeling better. I'm building some muscle & enjoying the feeling that my body is stronger again.

To do what I need to do, I have to be selfish & disregard what others may think of my appearance when out in public or at the gym - yeah, I even joined a gym. & I still feel self-conscious about wearing revealing clothing, but I, as I said, grit my teeth, & get on with my exercises even while feeling 'unsightly' - but, I say, how much do I really care about the opinions of people I don't know? Not a fig!