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Buying a house & I'm scared not excited

WHITE_K
Community Member

My partner and I made an offer on a house, it was more than we had planned and it got accepted. It's only just above what we had figured out our max was, and finance shouldn't be an issue. But that's what's freaking me out, it's freaking me out that our higher offer got accepted and maybe we've paid too much.

We've been looking for a little while and figuring things out like what we want to buy etc. This property has a perfect house, lots of land and it has sheds (all what we wanted). But it's more rural than I would have liked. My partner isn't worried about the commute, but I am. It's a house close to my extended family, but a house so far from the life I've built so far in the city.

I thought I'd be excited that our offer got accepted, but I'm just scared. Scared I won't like living away from the city, my work, my life and my friends. Scared that we've paid too much for the house. Worried the property won't be worth anything in the future because it's rural. Worried that I'll feel isolated and restricted in what I do socially. etc.

I don't know if its my mind telling me I don't want this house or if it's normal to be so scared to buy your first home.

6 Replies 6

socialmoth
Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

Hi WHITE_K, welcome to the forum.

While I haven't bought my first house yet, moving freaks me out and I've had really similar worries around rent prices, proximity to the city etc. However, I worry about living too close to the city. I enjoy my wide open space.

Finances can bring out a lot of worries and stress in people and I think that is something that it would be good to talk to your partner about. It sounds like it's not so much of an issue for them so it might be good to have the conversation and ease your mind.

Also, I think if you're determined enough, you won't find that living further away from the city restricts you or makes you feel isolated. I desperately want to live in the bush, as I find that there is more of a community out there. I hope this helps!

white knight
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hi, welcome

Firstly, I have extensive experience in commuting regional to the city many years ago. At one time we lived 45 minutes from my work through windy roads dodging the odd wombat. Then we moved 15 minutes further out to another town making the daily trip one hour. I lasted 3 years doing that and it took its toll.

I ran an old car so a newish car would be more comfortable so you and your partner might last longer commuting.

The other issue is renewing a car/s that wear out- and they do. Two hours a day x 230 working days equals 46,000kms a year means 4 mechanical services preferably near your workplace, not at home town that takes time away from your days off. So I conclude that 35-40 minutes is the maximum. Nevertheless you can both try to seek local work. You might change professions.

You can utilise lots of travel time for things that otherwise would take time out of your time off. Like contacting friends and relatives using hands free phones so up to date hands free phones - apple voice reaction etc is handy.

Regardless of all these requirements in respect to your property purchase, you are thinking you might have paid too much for it, in a couple of short years you will realise that any shortfall will be made up with inflation and property rises. Old people, all of them, if they look back on their purchase history there will be instances whereby they have paid too much for one item and too little for others. It's called losing on the slide and picking it up on the merry go round.

Repost anytime

TonyWK

Paw Prints
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Hello White K.

Welcome to the BB forums...

Buying your first house is a big step for any of us... it is not unusual to feel scared about taking on such a big change... finding yourself questioning if you have done the right thing is also completely natural.

When I moved here 5 years ago I had similar thoughts to what you are having... I'm definitely not in commuting distance, having moved from the city to a very rural property... having family & friends saying I was mad to take on such an out of the way property didn't help... but I don't regret moving at all... even if it is now an hours drive to the nearest town... I've adjusted to not having shops 5 minutes away...

Yes there will be changes to your life after moving away (regardless of where you move to)... try to focus on the reasons why you wanted to move to the type of property you have chosen... give yourself time to adjust... time to find & make new social connections in your new place... time to find your feet & make a new life. Remember you can always sell up & move (yes rural properties mostly do hold or increase their value, especially ones in commuting distance)... if it turns out not for you.

Paws

antmilburn930
Community Member
Hi, white_k! What you're feeling right now is totally valid. I've been in a similar situation before where I was more scared than excited. Change is always scary, but it does not mean that it's bad. Of course, you're investing a lot of money in a house plus, in your case, you're making a big shift moving to rural. As for me, I moved to a whole different country. Like you, I was in love with the house, but leaving my old life scared me. But it does get better! Hopefully, you'll get used to it eventually. It's been a year since we moved here in our new place and I have no regrets. You can check our new house here if you're interested of what it looks like: https://paradisedevelopments.com/.

The_Bro
Valued Contributor
Valued Contributor

Gidday WhiteK and a big welcome to the forum.

Firstly, CONGRATULATIONS on purchasing a new home! Being a little older, I have sold my home and purchased a new one around eight times in my life and the buzz I got each time never subsided. You mention the property has all you wanted with a perfect house, lots and land and sheds (I am jealous already!). There is so much to look forward to as you make the house your home with furnishings, put those sheds to use and maybe get chooks for fresh eggs each morning!

Property has never let me down. It is highly likely you have a good investment - your finance provider may have data on what similar properties in the area have sold for or are valued at. Their own valuer will have to look at the property to approve your loan - see if you can have a chat with him to help with your anxiety. I recall I used the valuers knowledge more than once to check I hadn't paid too much with houses..

But yes, it is a big commitment and a degree of "have I done the right thing?" is perfectly normal.

Have a housewarming for your current friends, and make an effort to engage with the local rural community as they are normally very friendly. Even joining the local clubs and Rural Fire Service will earn big brownie points with locals.

Regarding the commute, the longest I had was just under an hour and I loved it. Listening to music, the news, calling friends, audio books etc passed the time very quickly. One commute was on the train which was great for reading. With mileage, I was clocking about 40,000k per year and my car never missed a beat as modern cars are so reliable. If you are getting stuck in peak hour traffic, maybe ask your employer for flexible hours - arriving early and leaving early for a smoother commute. I also found the evening commute was great for unwinding.

So there is a lot to look forward to with your new house - just remind yourself why you loved it in the first place. Rural living has lots to offer if you are prepared to give it a go.

I hope this has helped a little WhiteK, and am very happy to discuss further at any time.

All the very best with moving in!

Reegards,The Bro

Hilanior
Community Member
I completely understand your concerns... I felt similar anxiety when buying my first home and worried about overpaying and adjusting to a new location. It’s normal to feel scared so here’s a tip: try spending some time in the area to see if it feels right. If the house meets your needs, it could become a perfect new home.