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Just Sara A Bouquet for Pearls - share your appreciation for other members
  • replies: 715

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful word... View more

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful words. I hope this thread stays active through members giving out praise regularly to people they feel deserving, and therefore keep generosity of spirit alive within the pages of BeyondBlue Forum. My bunch of Red Roses (my choice) goes to Wishful for the following sentence; 'Personally, I see no reason to be praised in me, but I'm learning that seeing through the eyes of others can be more accurate!!' I so hear you Wishful. Just beautiful... Try to keep your leading comments short to focus on 'their' words. Choose specific flowers (or a gift if you like) to present to them. Sign off respectfully and sincerely. I hope this takes off... Spreading the love...Sara

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Live Alcohol and anxiety
  • replies: 3

Hi. I am new and not too sure of what to do. i am a wife and mother of 4. I am looking for help and support around alcohol and anxiety. basically I binge drink, then feel bad about it and hate it. Hate that it takes my weekends, takes my family time ... View more

Hi. I am new and not too sure of what to do. i am a wife and mother of 4. I am looking for help and support around alcohol and anxiety. basically I binge drink, then feel bad about it and hate it. Hate that it takes my weekends, takes my family time and takes my sanity.

white knight Personal Values
  • replies: 5

They are indeed personal. We humans are a diverse lot. The values spectrum is wide. But the point of this thread is to explain the benefits of flexibility when it comes to working with others, that have different values...and that's everyone! If we s... View more

They are indeed personal. We humans are a diverse lot. The values spectrum is wide. But the point of this thread is to explain the benefits of flexibility when it comes to working with others, that have different values...and that's everyone! If we stand by our own values to the letter and believe those values are something to be proud of and are "right", then how can we get along with others when their values conflict with ours? There are some issues that can get in the way of values. Miscommunication is one. Merely taking comments from others that appear they differ from us can make a friendship terminal. We get sensitive, angry, confrontational and sometimes our friendships and family relationships are terminal. From my observations those with mental illness often, but not always, have difficulty in this area of personal values. Not in having them, in falling into conflict because such values aren't the same as others values. I grew up in a household that us siblings took offence if we didn't agree with each other. I joined the RAAF and lived with other men. It came about one day when a guy said "that's ok, I don't agree with you but that fine, we cant agree on everything." It opened my eyes up to how people can disagree agreeably. Wow, I cant maintain friendships! The next step I had to learn was to reassure others that there is no need for conflict. To disagree is ok but as we can disagree on basic, touchy topics like politics, religion, children, etc we should avoid conflict by reassurance ..."its ok, I'm disagreeing but I see your viewpoint. It's not the end of the world and I don't want this to hurt our friendship, I value you". Do it! Reach out. Finally, contact later. Sometimes a friend could leave our home with disappointment. Wait 2 days. Ring them. "Hi Ralph, I just thought I'd ring you to see how you are, I have no bad feelings about our tiff" Then the golden rule- keep quiet, let them speak. Once they have finished "getting it all out" you can take it from there, depending on the conflict you can wait a few weeks and try again. Relationships are fluid. They ebb and flow. Expecting friendships to remain firm and constant is not being realistic, maybe hopeful, optimistic and inflated. Familiarity breeds contempt, is true. To expect relationships to move in and out due to differences in personal values, is to accept that pliability, flexibility that's required to make it work long term. We cant agree on everything. Tony WK

Guest_8790 Do I like Myself?
  • replies: 14

Well not really I guess. can't change your appearance but wish there was but I've put up with myself for over half a century but now and again my hate me thoughts come in. such is life. I usually fake it until I make it attitude so no one will know h... View more

Well not really I guess. can't change your appearance but wish there was but I've put up with myself for over half a century but now and again my hate me thoughts come in. such is life. I usually fake it until I make it attitude so no one will know how I feel. not sure why writing this now guess am having.a self doubt moment.of my direction on life and struggling with studies. assessment due Tuesday. . guess it's called life. rusted forever

DanTheMan001 Unleash your Feelings
  • replies: 6

Hey everyone! This forums post is where you can write all of your complaints and frustrations. Say whatever you want to about whoever you want, but follow these rules: 1 - Don't be racist, sexist or offensive to anyone else in the forums. 2 - You can... View more

Hey everyone! This forums post is where you can write all of your complaints and frustrations. Say whatever you want to about whoever you want, but follow these rules: 1 - Don't be racist, sexist or offensive to anyone else in the forums. 2 - You can use some caps if you want, but don't use them excessively. 3 - If someone breaks any of these rules, tell me and I will do something if I can. Thanks guys! Remember, you can say whatever you want as long as it doesn't break any rules. Dan

Soberlicious96 H.A.L.T.S ..... don't let the HALTS get you.
  • replies: 1

When I first got into recovery, I heard people talk about having the 'halts' .... Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired, Serious. When I notice I have one, two or more of these, I need to take action. Hungry? Eat something! If your tummy is rumbling, it gener... View more

When I first got into recovery, I heard people talk about having the 'halts' .... Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired, Serious. When I notice I have one, two or more of these, I need to take action. Hungry? Eat something! If your tummy is rumbling, it generally means you need food! So eat something! I know that sometimes when I'm hungry, I am also a bit angry, so having a snack can fix two issues at one time! Angry? I was told to 'hit my pillow'! It won't hurt the pillow, yourself, or anyone else, and it will help to get expel at least a little of that physical tension that comes with anger. And Tell someone you're angry, and why. And if there's no-one around to tell, then put pen to paper, or fingertips to keyboard. Get it out of your head and SHARE it. A problem shared is a problem halved. Lonely? Call someone. Telephone therapy, we call it in 12 step recovery. Invite someone over to your house, or go to their place. Or maybe find some sort of activity to engage in with others. Volunteer work or paid work or both. Find something or somewhere where there are people whom you can connect with. Tired? Sleep. Or at least lay down somewhere quiet, with no distractions, where you can close your eyes and just switch off. Even if it is just for 10 or 15 minutes. Sometimes that little powernap can make all the difference. (too) Serious? Have a laugh! There are some great videos on YouTube; funny animal videos are my favorite! There's one that's a 'translation' video of a cat vs a printer that is just so hilarious! It does have a bit of swearing in it, so be mindful of what can come up. But it gets me laughing out loud every time! Life is too short to be serious all the time, and laughter is the best medicine! Or I also like going to the newsagent or supermarket and pausing in the greeting card section to read the funny greeting cards. They too can be really funny. Anyway, enjoy your Saturday night everyone. I'm heading out for a reunion dinner now, with some old workmates. Take care. Love Mel. xo

Angela_J Schizoaffective Disorder
  • replies: 17

Hey there, I have just been diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder and I am finding life really tough. I have been in and out of employment for years and can never hold down a job because of anxiety/paranoia and delusions/ hallucinations when I work... View more

Hey there, I have just been diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder and I am finding life really tough. I have been in and out of employment for years and can never hold down a job because of anxiety/paranoia and delusions/ hallucinations when I work. I am actually in an acute pychiatric ward at the moment. I am applying for the Disability Support Pension because I am on so much medication that I am too out of it to work. Is there anyone else out there who has schizoaffective disorder? How do you cope with the anxiety and paranoia that you feel? Are you able to work? I would love to here from some other people with the same disorder and connect with them online to help one another. I hope I hear from someone soon. Thanks, Angela.

Guest_093 Feeling mentally/physically unwell
  • replies: 5

I am feeling overwhelmed yet again, not getting a good night's rest, this morning wanted a bathroom stop @ 1.40am made it there, came out got a drink of water, sat down had a ciggie, got up to go back to bed, went sideways physically ended up on floo... View more

I am feeling overwhelmed yet again, not getting a good night's rest, this morning wanted a bathroom stop @ 1.40am made it there, came out got a drink of water, sat down had a ciggie, got up to go back to bed, went sideways physically ended up on floor & grazed my elbow on brick wall and have a sore hip from this, layed there 4 a min & thought this is'nt right, slowly got up on knees & hands & literally staggered down the hallway swaying from side 2 side bumping the walls, made it 2 end of hall 2 turn into bedroom misjudged bedroom doorway headbutted the door frame & ended up on the floor yet again making so much noise from 1st fall down hallway 2 next misadventure but still no-one woke up, again lying on floor thinking I wish I could blame having a few drinks in me 2 cause this but have had 1 rum/coke 3 weeks ago and no drinking since then. Finally crashed into bed and went straight to sleep. I recall since being on nu meds that I have being bumping into things a lot, not sleeping well, feeling drowsy and fatiqued. My mind is not working @ 100% or I feel like it is not. My husband is very worried about me and agrees that I am not physically/mentally well + my boss knows that I have depression and anxiety she is also worried about me as well, she has spoken 2 me and says she is worried about me as a friend, do I trust that statement or am I being naive, I know she gossips with other staff (or I hear these things in my head) she has told me eye 2 eye stuff about the other staff @ work. So much so much so much!!!!!

Janeygirl Boundaries for emotional safety after trauma and bereavement
  • replies: 6

Hi Friends This is my first time on the forum, I am keen to get views about boundaries. I am supporting my husband who is having a mental health crisis , memories of my grief and loss after the death of our. baby 20 years ago are returning. I turned ... View more

Hi Friends This is my first time on the forum, I am keen to get views about boundaries. I am supporting my husband who is having a mental health crisis , memories of my grief and loss after the death of our. baby 20 years ago are returning. I turned to a friend for support but she was not able to listen. I came away feeling worse. She lost a child herself but has not done any counselling afterwards. In the past she was very supportive to me. I said that I couldn't continue the conversation as I wasn't feeling safe. I was kind and firm. I am left feeling sad and guilty and a sense that I should be cheering her up. I said we ll catch up after the crisis and said I needed to be safe, she apologised . I am sad Any tips on boundaries and maintaining friendships thanks

Brett Just diagnosed with bipolar disorder
  • replies: 11

Welcome, My name is Brett and I have just been diagnosed with bipolar disorder. This certainly wasn't welcome news but, in looking back at my life, it makes sense of a lot of my experiences. I have experienced a few amazing highs (or so I thought at ... View more

Welcome, My name is Brett and I have just been diagnosed with bipolar disorder. This certainly wasn't welcome news but, in looking back at my life, it makes sense of a lot of my experiences. I have experienced a few amazing highs (or so I thought at the time) and a lot of lows. Apart from getting some of my thoughts onto this site, I really wanted to share a simple idea. That is, I have decided to lead the healthiest lifestyle I can in order to stay well. To many, this might sound a little obvious but, as I am heading towards a cycle of depression, it is very easy to lose hope. I wont go through the long list of what I am going to do to stay well other than to say I am going to follow the advice given to me by my trusted support people. I hope that a simple decision can help you too. From the bottom of my heart, I wish you wellness and happiness. Kindest Regards, Brett.

Billyc Misery Sells..
  • replies: 4

Hi All, just felt a bit inspired and thought I’d stream a thread about how Misery becomes a product for public consumption. movies, songs, novels, plays poems to name a few. i dont know if anyone would be intrested in this but thought it might help d... View more

Hi All, just felt a bit inspired and thought I’d stream a thread about how Misery becomes a product for public consumption. movies, songs, novels, plays poems to name a few. i dont know if anyone would be intrested in this but thought it might help distract from our woes.. its a discussion about anything regarding selling mystery.. feel free to share, I love reading others thoughts on this