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Sophie_M Sleep and Mental Health
  • replies: 0

Many of us have struggled with bouts of troubled sleep, and needless to say, these periods of nocturnal restlessness can be utterly overwhelming and exhausting. Sleeplessness can filter into every aspect of our lives: our ability to be present, remem... View more

Many of us have struggled with bouts of troubled sleep, and needless to say, these periods of nocturnal restlessness can be utterly overwhelming and exhausting. Sleeplessness can filter into every aspect of our lives: our ability to be present, remember things, regulate our emotions, or to feel excited and energised… it can change the way we think and feel in such a significant and impactful way. Whether it’s due to big life changes, global pandemics, financial or work stressors, health concerns (like menopause), how much ‘you’ time you have, or even unprocessed emotions you weren’t aware were there – so many things can impact how you sleep. All of this goes to show that not only do your daily habits, routines, and experiences play a huge role in maintaining healthy sleep cycles, but so does your mental health. And frustratingly enough, your sleep also impacts and informs your mental health and daily habits. Like most things, it’s a very easy cycle to fall into. So, it’s imperative that we are gentle and compassionate with ourselves on our journey to understanding what is making us so hypervigilant and unable to rest in the first place. Studies show that journaling or mindfulness practices throughout the day, healthy food, movement, sunshine, connection with loved ones, and support from health professionals can help us to feel more grounded and able to rest. But we are curious… what has worked for you? When do you notice that your sleep is most affected vs. when you get the best rest? And is there a way you could practice regulating your nervous system more throughout the day to help promote better sleep at night? We would love to hear your thoughts! Let us know if you have any questions and be sure to check out our page on ‘Sleep and Mental Health’ for more guidance and insight into a more supported and restful night’s sleep: Sleep and mental health - Beyond Blue - Beyond Blue Looking forward to hearing from you! Kind regards, Sophie M

Just Sara A Bouquet for Pearls - share your appreciation for other members
  • replies: 715

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful word... View more

Every now and then, members share a beautiful Pearl of Wisdom. How often do you think to yourself; "OMG that's great! I wish everyone could see this." Presenting someone with a bunch of flowers is a generous way of acknowledging their insightful words. I hope this thread stays active through members giving out praise regularly to people they feel deserving, and therefore keep generosity of spirit alive within the pages of BeyondBlue Forum. My bunch of Red Roses (my choice) goes to Wishful for the following sentence; 'Personally, I see no reason to be praised in me, but I'm learning that seeing through the eyes of others can be more accurate!!' I so hear you Wishful. Just beautiful... Try to keep your leading comments short to focus on 'their' words. Choose specific flowers (or a gift if you like) to present to them. Sign off respectfully and sincerely. I hope this takes off... Spreading the love...Sara

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MarkJT No More Zero Days
  • replies: 2

So an idea was floated and i love it. It is called 'No more zero days". What does this mean? It means that to help you recover and to help keep yourself healthy, you make a practice of having no zero days. No zero days are the days where you do absol... View more

So an idea was floated and i love it. It is called 'No more zero days". What does this mean? It means that to help you recover and to help keep yourself healthy, you make a practice of having no zero days. No zero days are the days where you do absolutely nothing. Like lay in ed all day. This are obviously counter productive to recovery and self care. If you find yourself having one of these days, do one push up, walk around the block, cook something healthy, practice some mindfulness, something, anything, just dont do nothing, i.e. have a zero day. I am well advanced in my recovery from PTSD and i still have days where i want to do nothing but i at least have to achieve at least one thing on those days. I now have a name to apply to it...a no zero day. Perhaps make a list of things or activities you can do if you find yourseld in danger of having a zero day so you have an easy reference point. Good luck and lets all collectively have no zero days! Mark.

Kal08 Changing my mindset!
  • replies: 3

Recently I have felt negative, everything made me mad or annoyed, I felt as if something was always going wrong. I stepped back and tried to appreciate all the things that made me happy, and all the things I take for granted every day. I thought abou... View more

Recently I have felt negative, everything made me mad or annoyed, I felt as if something was always going wrong. I stepped back and tried to appreciate all the things that made me happy, and all the things I take for granted every day. I thought about how lucky I was in life and didnt focus on the things going wrong. Life is too short to focus on all the small things. I re prioritesed my focus and energy onto things that matter, Family, Friends, Uni, Work and things that make me happy. What are some small (or big) things in your life you appreciate day to day that you could easily take for granted? Or what is something you take for granted that you need to appreciate more of? Today I appreciated the smell of the fresh country air when I said goodbye to my fiance at our front door (even though it was 5am and I was tired) I also appreciated that I had I could go back inside, turn my tap on, fill up my kettle and sit and enjoy a cup of coffee. xxx

Just Sara '''Self trust''' - a path to recovery, or too difficult a task?
  • replies: 6

Hi all posters and readers; A recent situation occurred which proved valuable in learning to trust myself to be a better person for me, not 'them'. Many times I've read about people who say their trust has been eroded in everyone and everything in th... View more

Hi all posters and readers; A recent situation occurred which proved valuable in learning to trust myself to be a better person for me, not 'them'. Many times I've read about people who say their trust has been eroded in everyone and everything in the world; suffering with agoraphobia, or becoming a hermit by choice. I suffered a break-down and then anxiety/panic symptoms for yrs, but have had relief due to acting on my own behalf instead of relying on those around me to change, or pleasing them because they refuse to change. This meant I had to learn to trust 'my' judgement, motivation and skill in communicating what I wanted. It also meant learning to defend my position tactfully, without being swayed by emotional threats or fear of the same. When I first started doing this, albeit clumsily, others resented it, argued, ignored me or gave unpleasant looks. Yes, it was hard to say the least. But as I persevered, my skill and resolve improved. No, I still don't trust those around me to do right by me. However, 'they' are learning not to abuse me or my resolve now, and blow me down with a feather; they're changing! Standing up for me, without previous fear, gives a real sense of freedom and empowerment. How brave are you? Would you consider standing your ground with people you're scared of being yourself around? Could you trust yourself to do right by you; tactfully? Would you rather feel happy when you go home from a family gathering, or feel resentment and inadequacy while complaining to your spouse in the car afterwards? First time posters are welcome to respond too. Sara

blondguy GOOGLE: The Good and the Bad on Mental Health
  • replies: 6

Hi Everybody and New Posters! This isnt an anti Google Thread. Its only my experience after having chronic anxiety followed by depression since 1983. Google is an invaluable search tool and used daily by billions of people globally, however... When i... View more

Hi Everybody and New Posters! This isnt an anti Google Thread. Its only my experience after having chronic anxiety followed by depression since 1983. Google is an invaluable search tool and used daily by billions of people globally, however... When it comes to researching mental health it has flaws and there are many. When a person is trying to 'self heal' or 'self diagnose' it can sometimes make us feel worse or even exacerbate any existing symptoms that we have. Sure we may learn something about our symptoms but to a 'tired' mind it can become bewildering, confusing not to mention depressing due to the tonnage of information available The Beyond Blue Anxiety/Depression Checklist may save you a lot of frustration/anguish prior to using Google www.beyondblue.org.au/the-facts/anxiety-and-depression-checklist-k10 If you have had success or frustration using Google to self diagnose or even just check on a symptom please post and let us know your views my kind thoughts Paul

white knight Forgiveness and forgeting. The two "F's" for love
  • replies: 6

The two F's, my own idea of maintaining an ability to overcome so many hurtful situations. I've listened to friends and acquaintances talk about how they "draw the line" with their spouse when it came to splitting up. "he rubbished my son and that wa... View more

The two F's, my own idea of maintaining an ability to overcome so many hurtful situations. I've listened to friends and acquaintances talk about how they "draw the line" with their spouse when it came to splitting up. "he rubbished my son and that was the end of the line"..."she brought up my previous marriage and I knew then that was the end of us" -these words can be decisive in ones action to leave their partner. But are they only words? I mean actions are a different story. Affairs,gambling, incompatibility, bashings etc are in my mind far more substantial as reasons to leave your partner. What of the rare argument/slanging match whereby you yell and scream over domestic issues? Yes, we all do have our "line" we draw but I ask you...when does pride overtake wisdom? Pride overtake love? Where does the act of forgiveness have its place? And where does forgetting come into its own? During our worse arguments we are not ourselves.If we arent ourselves then is being out of control acceptable? Post argument it can all come down to regret, asking forgiveness and most importantly...moving on successfully. Moving on depends on your ability to put the words and minor actions behind you. Not drag them up even in your own mind. I had a friend. He and his wife had an argument.During the height of the 'war' she threw mince meat at the guys face. He was stunned. The argument was over her not leaving the kitchen while he baked sausage rolls for her ladies group the next day. Her almost obsession with cleaning took over and she was placing items he was using in the dishwasher. It became unworkable and he snapped. She yelled, he yelled, then she threw the mince. Initially he was so stunned he yelled "that's it, nobody assaults me in that manner, its over".30 minutes later she returned to the kitchen distressed. She asked forgiveness. She pleaded he not leave her.She was totally distraught. He sat her down and told her that his love extends so far that he would forgive her and then told her, "I will also never recall that you threw mince at my face, that is part of my act of forgiveness- for I love you". It was assault, it was demeaning, it was stupid and unnecessary. His kindness for her was at the time in cooking something for her group.She knew it. But he also knew that she meant well by cleaning up. Turns out she was having a change of life. We all have arguments but love can extend far further than you think. After all, its only words....and a bit of mince...

gld Keeping on track
  • replies: 4

Finally you reach the conclusion you have concord the beasts causing you grief. Then in a brief moment you relax and let your guard down suddenly realising that it knocking at the door again. Has anyone out there got some good suggestions to hold the... View more

Finally you reach the conclusion you have concord the beasts causing you grief. Then in a brief moment you relax and let your guard down suddenly realising that it knocking at the door again. Has anyone out there got some good suggestions to hold them back and hold on to the good habits and develop new desirable habits? I feel that the undesirable habits have been around so long that it is so easy for them to come back as they make you feel comfortable. Even though you know they are dragging you down. Keen to learn some new tools to better myself. Gen

gwoolste Self Acceptance of Your Mental Illness
  • replies: 3

Today I was reading about the passing of Carrie Fisher, a long time support of mental health. In reading of an interview with Dianne Sawyer (American journalist) Carrie famously said: " She was not ashamed" of her mental illness, or the treatment she... View more

Today I was reading about the passing of Carrie Fisher, a long time support of mental health. In reading of an interview with Dianne Sawyer (American journalist) Carrie famously said: " She was not ashamed" of her mental illness, or the treatment she sought for it."I am mentally ill. I can say that. I am not ashamed of that," she said. "I survived that, I'm still surviving it, but bring it on. Better me than you." I know that at times it feels like society makes it feel that Mental illness is shameful. However, I too like Carrie Fisher admit I am mentally ill and will more than likely be so for the rest of my life. I do however, have some really good times that go with some really challenging moments. I feel its important to let others know this, and I take opportunities to speak to groups, or individuals about my illness, what has helped me to manage it better and what is in my toolkit. I encourage all with a mental illness to not be ashamed and remember some of those with mental illness have made some of the greatest contributions to mankind.

Doolhof HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE! WOOHOO TO 2017 ! (share your resolutions here)
  • replies: 12

Hi Everyone, If you hadn't noticed, we are now in 2017! For some of us, 2016 was not so flash in parts with some events being experiences we would rather forget. Guess what! This is a NEW YEAR! We can all start over again! I know there has been great... View more

Hi Everyone, If you hadn't noticed, we are now in 2017! For some of us, 2016 was not so flash in parts with some events being experiences we would rather forget. Guess what! This is a NEW YEAR! We can all start over again! I know there has been great hardship and tragedy in so many people's lives, I truly acknowledge that and my heart felt best wishes go out to you all. For me, I am going to try hard to make this the best year I can! I'm going to work on improving my health mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually. I'm going to find different ways to make the most of each day, to laugh more and have some fun. A trip to the library will help me find some comical books to read or maybe one on a place I have dreamt about visiting. I will eventually drag the tent out of the shed and set it up, even if it is just in the back yard. I will look in my garden for flowers or nice looking foliage to place in a vase on the table. Oh! There are so many things to experience and try. Who wants to join me in making 2017 a year of experiencing new and different things or revitalising past hobbies and interests? Okay, anyone have any suggestions for what they hope to do this year? Today is a brand new day! Grab hold of it and embrace it! Cheers all from Dools

Kitana New Year, New Book, 12 Chapters, 365 pages. Love 2017
  • replies: 1

Had small bouts of depression here and there over the years, but I went through serious depression towards the end of last year primarily due to work and the feeling that my life had come to a halt at the age of 35. Realized that my life revolved too... View more

Had small bouts of depression here and there over the years, but I went through serious depression towards the end of last year primarily due to work and the feeling that my life had come to a halt at the age of 35. Realized that my life revolved too much around my job (which was getting more stressful every day and I felt my manager was a devil in sheep's clothing), and my biological clock was ticking and I didn't have a husband nor kids like everyone around me my age... Anyways, I had serious depression and needed to find an outlet to release my feelings. I am extremely grateful to find this site and express my story through the forums - I am thankful for the people who replied to my posts and encouraged me to see my GP about my depression. I did go and see my GP and she and her nurse helped me. So to update:- I got the courage and determination to move out of my comfort zone, and I got a new challenging job. Furthermore, I realized 2016 was a year for me to learn valuable life lessons. What I learnt are as follows (disclaimer= these are MY life lessons, probably completely different to everyone else): 1. No use getting stressed over people and things you don't have control over. You can't change people, you can only change your own attitude towards them. 2. My Time is valuable, so spend it on people and on a job that will help me grow and gain fulfillment. 3. Don't be afraid to let go of unhealthy relationships, whether it be a toxic partner or friends that you no longer have common interest with... Don't be afraid to seek new relationships. I was afraid to let go, fearing I was going to be alone and lonely... There are so many great people out there waiting to meet you - go out and seek. 4. Try to eliminate or at least limit social media use (ie Facebook, Instagram, SnapChat)- People post what they want others to perceive as awesome, always happy, blah blah blah. Focus on your own life, and don't compare yourself to others - you don't walk in their shoes or know what happens behind close doors - focus on you. 5. At the end of the day, believe in yourself - it's all up to you to change your life. Remember to be grateful for the simple things/blessings - roof over your head, food to eat, family that loves you. Again, I'm grateful to have found this site. It helped me get through my 'blue' period last year, and am feeling great and looking forward to the next chapters that the new year brings! Thanks

white knight Theory, practice and insight
  • replies: 7

A couple of years ago I sought my 10 visits under a care plan. I attended a psychologist. At the end of the sessions she told me her thoughts. "You are one of the lucky ones Tony, you have insight into you illnesses, and you know the theory, your cha... View more

A couple of years ago I sought my 10 visits under a care plan. I attended a psychologist. At the end of the sessions she told me her thoughts. "You are one of the lucky ones Tony, you have insight into you illnesses, and you know the theory, your challenge is putting it all into practice. You need to put a lid on your emotions and think more before you react." Back to that in a moment. My wife of 5 years has dyslexia, I've known her 30 years now. When she can't spell a word she asks me. I spell the word without her feeling inadequate. When young she was ridiculed and labelled "dumb". But being dyslexic has little to do with intelligence. She reads books, does our finances, plans holidays and so on. She just has a hard time spelling and with arithmetic. So the connection I see here is that humans have abilities and inabilities. We have areas where we don't perform to a level we want to be at. Geniuses can have vision or thoughts well beyond 99.9% of the population but some can't put oil in their car, pump up tyres or test a battery. Churchill defended the world from Hitler but he couldn't shake the " black dog". So back to "putting theory into practice." I've been trying really hard to ...count to ten before I raise my voice at confronting people, be more patient with others. Seek time out when the bipolar mood arrives etc. But I'm now of the opinion that I have found my limits and therefore found my inabilities, identified both ends of my capabilities and what's important, I've come to terms with this knowledge. I've found peace in this process. Isnt that significant? Sure is. To me it signals that my incapacity to act on the symptoms of my illnesses actually proved they are indeed serious medical conditions and that means there is darn good reason not to be able to overcome. Such inability is in my opinion equal to other peoples barriers like dyslexia, socially inept, addicts of many fixes, speech impediment and so on. The key is giving it your best effort, then accepting that all humans are imperfect. Focussing on what you do well and accepting what you are incapable of doing well as being OK. The sheer weight on your shoulders of mental illness often leads to low self esteem and withdrawal. Stand proud that you try. There is no better feeling when at the end if the tunnel that you've accepted who you are.... Worts and all. Do you have difficulty putting theory into practice? Do you have insight into your illness? Tony WK