6.5 hrs till I go away on my detox/rehab mission for few months.

[wantalife]

I've self written hieroglyphic tattoos down my for arms with scars of self slicing... I have had a gut full and fixing this shit!!. no communication while I'm gone.. Will miss you guys. 🙂 but it is what it is..

[geoff]

hi Wantalife, you know we all get ourselves into a hole deeper than we would ever imagine, but then we fall further and it never seems as though there is never a bottom to end this misery, but it continues on, hoping that there could be something that would stop us from reaching oblivion where no one cares what happens to us, but then something inside of you wakes up and when this happens, it's the beginning of the help you so much need.
Whether this is your first time, second time it doesn't really matter, because there is only so much you can suffer from and now you have choosen to go into rehab, well done.
All I want for you is to get better, to rid yourself of any pressure that has caused this, and wish you all the very best.
You're there because you want to be there, that's half the battle over, but it will be a new world once you return to us.
Good luck and remember you have our backing. Geoff.

[wantalife]

Your an absolute gentleman Geoff, and I not only appreciate feeling you have my back but at this hour is pretty full on. am now down to 4hrs.. Thats pretty awesome

[White_Rose]

Dear Wantalife

I am so impressed with your decision to turn your life around. Many, many congratulations. Geoff, in his usual wonderful manner, has said it all. You have reached the bottom and the only way now is up. You know it will be hard work but have chosen to go with it. So you are going ahead with eyes wide open. This will help you manage this journey. Come back and tell how awesome you are.

I have great admiration for your strength and determination. Go well.

Mary

[Solosombra]

You got this bro..

You seem the intelligent type and i got a feeling you will come out of this smarter and stronger then ever.

Better then yesterday, better then an hour ago!

Goodluck

[geoff]

dear Wantalife, I know it's full on but that hour glass is punishing you even before you are admitted, does it matter whether it's 6 hours or 4 hours, time wise yes it's 2 hours less, but being admitted no not really, it's a beginning to start to repair your life, in other words try and distract yourself.
You know the majority of your replies have been the person you really are, the one which has been very supportive and caring, and there is so much knowledge that you have, however when you start your addiction then it's another person, one which we don't want to know, and yes you will always have your back.
Those of us who have been in rehab know the journey ahead of you and if by any chance you decide to quit then remember these words which you have just said back to me 'Your an absolute gentleman Geoff', these words are so endearing and it means so much to me, and thank you, we will always be here for you. Geoff.

[Cornstarch]

Hey wantalife,

Regardless of the outcome, and regardless of what's happened to you, in your heart-of-hearts you know that there is something worth preserving, otherwise you would't have organised the treatment. That something is you.

I guess the challenge will be to let others witness that something, allowing people to get to know the secret self harming behaviours to lessen it's hold, and more importantly you beginning to be comfortable with their witnessing of it. I met a guy recently in his early 40s who was self harming that you remind me of.

Everyone, if they are honest and self-effacing enough, will admit that they have 'got ugly' at times. Despite this you have recognised that it's not worth killing your spark and your light. Not everyone is brave enough to leap and save it.

CornBeef

[wantalife]

Hey Guys

Not sure if this entry will be noticed as to the time past since date of post but for what it's worth and at the very least, a symbol of reflection is my way of expressing in a very genuine way how grateful I am.

I rarely seek or feel the need to ask for external help however in this instance I felt necessary and the kind and supportive words from the contributors did make a difference.

Whats transpired from then to now is I've spent a great deal of time studying and actively working face to face with clients. (Predominantly Dual Diagnosis) and with a bit of luck next year commence a Bachelor of Community Health and AOD. A government initiated position throughout the public health sector and although quite new to Au has been in place in the UK and other countries some time.

I'll leave it at that as the intention is not to try and big note, it's to say thank you for being a part of-In fact at the point of initiation in the fight to finding my feet.

Oh yeah, Am also quite content now as a non-drinker (Almost a year I think)

I really wish you all the best, some of which I got to know more than others. And given this specific strand in saying Geoff- Your pretty amazing Mate.

[Just Sara]

Hey stranger!

It's been a while since we crossed paths. I think the last thing you said to me was something about being full-on writing up a storm. (with tongue in cheek of course) 🙂

I'm so glad to see you doing the doing and looking to a future in A&OD. It'll suit you to a T.

Also proud of you for being sober for a yr. Congrat's my friend.

Btw...you're always noticed.

Sara (Hug)

[wantalife]

Oh Wow 🙂

You just brought about the biggest smile on my face, and I was just thinking you yesterday when I noticed "Just Sara"?. I thought to myself (as I figured it was you) What do mean "Just" Sara and laughed to myself. As your so much more!. I used love finding myself in conversations with you. Challenging, Stimulating, and gee at times. Well, certainly never lacked substance.

I miss that like I miss most the guys. Whiterose, Cornstarch, etc. and would love to know how Pauls travelling but I'll be honest in saying it's been a month of contemplation just to post what was to be an acknowledgement of appreciation as closure.

Reason-because I'm so friken embarrassed. I posted in the wrong section? was substance effected, irrational, (In hindsight the thread in the correct area could have at least potentially been one of positive re-enforcement with regards to the application of persistence as it does pay off)

Anyway I hope your really enjoying life at present, it's great to hear from you, and I really appreciate the vote of confidence, its something I'm very determined to make a commitment toward and though I'm aware we all have our history and exposure mine in which I believe to quite significant stems a little further than just myself an X-Wife and and Son

Thanks again for saying hi, really appreciate it.