LGBT+ members - got a question - need somewhere to start - here is the place

[MsPurple]

Welcome LGBT+ members and ally to the community.

A few LGBT+ forum users have questions and concerns they can't a find a place to ask it here on the beyond blue forums so I thought starting a place for questions and more serious/heavy conversations 🙂 Here you can ask questions about anything from questioning your sexuality/gender identity, coming out concerns, dating, mental health etc. If you are an ally (an Ally is a person who considers themselves a friend to the LGBTQ+ community) you are also welcome to come here to be a support to our community and ask questions as well. This is a supportive place for people to discuss their questions and concerns, we are not a place of judgement. As Thumper from the movie Bambi said "If you can't say somethin' nice, don't say nothin' at all."

If you are looking for a more social and light hearted conversation might I suggest joining us on the thread under BB social/rainbow cafe. Copy and paste the link: https://www.beyondblue.org.au/get-support/online-forums/bb-social-zone/let's-chat-about-anything

Feel free to introduce yourself below and ask any question/s

I thought I'd answer one common question in the intro post and this is one I have heard a lot. What do the letters mean? When referring to the community it is shortened to LGBT+ as there are more letters than just the 4. I have put some of the common ones here: Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender Transsexual Two-spirited Queer Questioning Intersex Asexual Ally Pansexual Agender Gender Queer

Welcome everyone and hope to see you around on this thread and around the BB forums

MP 🙂

[Guest_128]

I WAS BEING SUPPORTIVE

[MsPurple]

Thanks Dory for showing support

I need to let you know that I am dyslexic and sometimes I do struggle with reading sometimes, especially with portraying tone. So I apologize for me reading it wrong. although I am a community champion I still come on the forums to get support as well so sometimes my emotions take over and this may influence the way I interpret some text.

SN I am so happy for you finally finding a way to feel comfortable in yourself and your journey.

[startingnew]

i figure maybe to jsut accept it for what it is. dont force it but rather let things flow. while its confusing to me to know who or what i am figuring out sexuality takes time

[Just Sara]

Hi all!

Got my ballet paper and posted it 20 min's later! Woo-hoo...one for the good guys! I tried knocking on a few neighbours doors and offer to post theirs as well. None were home.

I saw a program interviewing kids and adult kids of same sex parents. It was really impressive. The marriage issue came up and they all smiled and told their views with enthusiasm except one young woman.

She was refused access to her bio dad which has skewed her opinions. Understandable, but not a marriage issue. It's an issue about beliefs and parenting styles.

There was a guy in his 40's who cried a couple of times. He loves his dads passionately and still can't come to terms with the cruelty society's dumped on him and his family unit.

He was particularly distressed about the 80's when Aids was in it's infancy. Kids at school in yr 12 would say he'd die from it and well done; less poof's on the planet. He cried talking of the deaths of family friends.

He did bring comedy relief though with comments like - "I could make a martini at age 10" What a lovely character! All my best to him and his family...

It was on ABC. I applaud them for their ability to put discussions of this nature out into the public eye. On ya's!!!

It's a waiting game now. Ah...pill's kicking in. Off to hit the hay...

Kind and compassionate thoughts to all;

Sez xoxo

[MsPurple]

Hi Sez

I got my ballot paper yesterday and posted it on my way to work today

I am glad they are having programs like that. Althought same-sex couples having kids is a completely different issue to same-sex marriage it is still a concern people have about the issue. I can understand the kids frustrtion not being able to meet their biological father. IT is similar in closed adoptions and sperm donor biological parents. My mum put her first born up for adoption, she knows his name but has never heard from him. She isn't sure if he ever wanted to, but she had a closed adoptions so he had no choice until he turned 18 to ask for her name from the adoption people who could then contact her. It is an issue not just for same sex couples.

I think that love is love. And a loving parent/s is all someone needs. I think I would have been just as happy with two mums or dads. My mum was a single mum so I was happy being at her house with just her (although I still saw dad at least 2 days a fortnight, or half time when I was <13 years) because she gave me all the love I needed in that home.

[Just Sara]

Hey MsP;

I understand this vote isn't about kids of same sex couples, but the debate about marriage is also about 'family'. My ex husband was my legal spouse, family; my son's father, next of kin at the hospital and legally able to speak for me when I wasn't able.

I'm not disagreeing with you by any means, I just think walking down the isle and signing legal papers is the beginning; it's not the whole picture.

If I don't declare a beneficiary on my pension/super/insurance, it goes to the next of kin or those who argue their entitlements. Family will be first considered.

That's all...

Sez x

[Chris_B]

Hi everyone, just a gentle reminder about the purpose of this thread - for LGBTIQ members of our online community to have a safe discussion space.

Others are welcome provided they respect that this is primarily a LGBTIQ space.

If you do not identify as LGBTIQ, or are not currently supporting someone in your life who is LGBTIQ, please read through beyondblue’s resources for and about LGBTIQ people here to educate yourself rather than posting in this thread.

[MsPurple]

HI Sez

I completely agree with you. It is try, I find it is disgraceful that the government doesn't give same sex defacto couples the same rights as straight defacto couples. The only way to be seen this way is to fill in a form to the government acknowledging you are a couple it is called a 'couples certificate' (my brother got one with his gf because they wanted to extend her visa and they needed proof of relationship). Another option is to make a legal document on it from a lawyer. Have you seen the movie called 'the single man' It has Colin Firth in it. His partner dies, and he is not his next of kin and he isn't allowed at the funeral. Breaks my heart. I will admit I did forget about this part when making my last post. As always Sez you are super on it and take you for enlightening me. As I said my brain is like a sieve at the moment.

[Just Sara]

Please; no need to apologise. We work as a team and this dialog is amazing.

There's a thread atm called 'venting about same sex marriage' I contributed to it a little while ago. The effects of social media on people is the premise for his complaints. A couple of our LGBTI guys have also responded. This plebiscite has far reaching consequences.

All's well MsP. 🙂 You're an absolute machine!

Sez xo

[cleews]

Hi Ms P,

Thanks for the movie recommendation; will check it up. Personally, I was very impacted by Shane Bitney-Crone's story, first as the YouTube Video, "It could happen to you", which was then made into the movie "Bridegroom". The movie is now on Netflix if anyone is interested. It's a real heartbreaker too and it made me realise how important this issue was to many people, not myself, but many others.

As I stated in another thread, I find it painful how some are exploiting the SSM to create a Us vs Them mentality, when we are all Australians and should look after each other. The Us vs Them is wielded like a weapon. As much as the outcome of the survey will have far reaching consequences, how the current fight is waged is just as far reaching.

As a tangent, I've watched that wonderful series that ABC created called "You Can't Ask That", ranging from Children of Same Sex Couples, to War Veterans, to Homeless People, Gambling Addicts and a whole range of other people. It's a fascinating and powerful series and I do urge others to watch it.

Chris