Wife took everything from me and cut me off from my kids

[Dave1980]

I don’t really know who to talk to about this so so thought I would just post it here to try to get it off my chest for a while.

My ex/wife and I went through a tough time in a few years back after my father died. I inherited some cash and basically had a midlife crisis as I had lost my father who was the only person in the world who gave me a sense of belonging and family.

During this time she took my kids on a “holiday” to her parents overseas and then returned to her full time public service job but left the kids overseas. She said she had to because she couldn’t cope with them here in Australia. However I insisted that as their Dad I could cope and that if she wanted to work out our problems she needed to bring them back. Long story short she refused, I suspect knowing how child support works and has now left Australia to live with the kids overseas.

I have seen my kids once in three years because with the child support she leeches out of me I have no savings to travel. She put an ultimatum that if I go there twice a year, she will bring them here at my expense. Clearly that’s impossible. So I am screwed. After settlement she took all of my inheritance (which I was told was not supposed to happen) and left me with nearly $1M in debt.

My new partner with whom I have a new daughter has decided that I don’t have enough money to support her and has turned to prostitution. She does this in Sydney. We live 3 hours from Sydney, and to try to make ends meet, I already work 5 days a week full time and run a business selling at markets on the weekends. However her money making means she can’t help me run the markets anymore so I am left doing that with my baby daughter.

im not sure what I did to end up in this situation. I seem to meet women who are obsessed with money and successful at working the system. I hope my daughters will not become like this when they grow up.

[Croix]

Dear Dave1980~

Welcome here. Life has handed you as very unfair go, and I think it is a tribute to you that you can talk about it as well as you do. Frankly if I had to write about that it would be all swearwords and abuse.

Your first wife sounds a toxic selfish person, and if it was not for the kiss I'd say you were well rid if her.

I'm sorry your dad passed away , he sounds a rock. He may have bequeathed you money which has not worked out but I suspect he has also given you something of much greater value - part of himself inherited inside you. It is something I'd suspect will come out in your children too, particularly your new daughter who is with you.

Do you mind if I ask a personal question? How do you and your new partner get on, is there affection and understanding? With her occupation as a sex worker, we do what we must. I'm not sure from your words how things stand between you.

Despite your money hassles you sound a strong and capable person, holding down a job, plus the market, and fatherhood. So much to offer someone.

Would you like to talk more?

Croix

[Doolhof]

Hi Dave,

I'm not really sure how to respond to your post! I am so very sorry for all that has happened to you.

I do so hope your daughters are able to see through what is happening around them as they grow up and they are able to recognise that you love and care for them deeply.

Child support is nothing I know anything about. Is it normal for people who take children overseas to receive benefits from partners who can now no longer see their children?

If you don't mind me asking, how long does your new partner intend to work in the sex trade? How do you feel about her chosen profession? How do you cope with it?

Hope you manage to find ways to look after yourself in all of this!

Cheers from Dools