FAQ

Find answers to some of the more frequently asked questions on the Forums.

Forums guidelines

Our guidelines keep the Forums a safe place for people to share and learn information.

to good to be true

leelee1994
Community Member
Dont know what to do anymore was doing so well with my depretion and finally starting to be happy again but since i started becoming a happyer funner mum my partner has now decided he wont text me no more threw the day stopped saying i love you stopped hugging me even touching me or holding my hand he would only txt if i txt first would only do things if i done to him first so i stopped and now its just like im single all over again dont even get a goodnight anymore im done feeling like im nothing these days i stay strong for my kids but i dont think i can deal with this relationship the way it is i go out of my way for him and get apsalutly nothing in return what am i ment to do im doing as he does to me so he knows how it feels to be ignored bit still yet nothing at all and the only time he talks to me is about work work is all everything is to him no how are you how was your day is your depretion ok nothing just dam work ive been crying for 3 days now im just about at my wit ends he wont talk to me about how im feeling he ignores everything
36 Replies 36

Hey jay yes rural life is hard but i can get out there and i find spending rime with my goats help me alot when im alone witch is good even tho they may not talk back still good to talk to them from time to time

Hey shell

so good i always take you advice into action and must say the list now i look at my partner in a diffrent way really its hard spending time with my partner dates are not on the list as his working 6 days a week most of the time and is gone 15 hours a day his work os really putting so much strain on our relationship this week his sleeping all day and working night shifts so really doesnt help much at all i get no time to even talk to him now

Im still spending time with my boys and pets spend the weekend with the kids on the bikes and some time with my lovely snakes i also have a new puppie to who has become my best friend atm i carry him everywhere i go even wash up while talking to my new poochy i have not yet found the pet thread tho but will continue on looking threw everything

Hoping the weekend brings more smiles tho partner has a 3 day weekend so hopefully ill have some sort of love back from him as i have told him how i truely feel for the very first time

hankyou everyone for the surport truely am happy i can come here and just let my thoughts go and knowing someon will listen feels great knowing that

Leelee xxx

Hi leelee1994,

I think it's great you can talk to the goats, people find solace in animals and pets all the time, sure they may not reply but they are great listeners 🙂

It's great news that you told your partner how you truly feel, how did that go down with him and yourself? I seem to pick up there was some clarity between you as you seem happier?

My best,

Jay

Hi jay

Yes i always talk to my goats about everything even if all they want is food most of the time cause they just dont stop eating but i can tell them anything the only time they walk away is when i say leave witch is hardly ever i must say they are very affectionet animals

I always take shells advice and always seams to change my day to day thinking with as she has threw another idea my way has help a little i look at my partner diffrent even if he doesnt see it

I feel better within myself since i hace finally told him how i feel without the fighting for the very first time its sorta change a couple of things but not a great deal but only time will tell i acturly got a hug and kiss befor he left for work instead of a cya when ever i get home and well i got a i love you text for the first time tonight instead of me texting him he text me first finally for once it wasnt me

Steo by step well see how or if he changes for me to change for him and to be happy again

Leeleee

Hi leelee,

I agree it is great you told your partner how you feel. I am so proud of you. That is great too that you wrote the list and it helped you. My idea is too keep the list and when special times come to your memory you add them. And also add to the list any brand new times. If you felt loved when he listened to you just recently, well you could write that one in too. You have encouraged me now, so thank you so much.

I also noticed you found a pet thread and I read what you wrote. There is also another one in the "Staying Well Section". I just posted to it, so you may like that one too. It is used fairly often by others as well.

Yeah about the date nights.....my hubby is a shift worker, so I understand you there and it is a challenge to go on dates isn't it? But not impossible. I will think more about this if you would like me too. Maybe something creative.

Aw a puppy..... Was he or she born from your other dogs then? You have quite a few dogs don't you? And goats....I have talked to a goat once or twice. It came up to me walking over anything in its path. I believe there were large pieces of tin sort of sticking flat like amongst a grassy small hill. It didn't bother the goat, it walked right over the top.

You do sound a bit more hopeful leelee.

Shell xx

Hey shell n jay

Yes animals are my help to life i have heaps around also a few new baby goats roaming around yes if they have there mind set on something nothing gets in there way

I have writen down loads of pages and still have more to go as his on night sift i can think of loads more to add and as i can work out our week on the beach is still happening once cars have rego again his full on set for the week on the beach with kids and i as he put it its our week to fall in love again and start our life again and be happy like we should be so thats a wait and see situation i think

Yes my new puppy is from a couple of our dogs was kind of a not ment to have happened litter tho as mother is a boxer and father is well a multess shitzu so as my partner calls it a boxermultsh*t but he is the cutest ever

Hi leelee1994,

That is awesome news on what your partner is doing, texting and hugging without prompting.. talking is an amazing thing.. I am having relationship troubles too and funnily enough the things she bought up were similar to things you expressed so I am also trying to make a concerted effort with her too. I have a puppy who keeps us happy and on our toes too.

Thank you for inspiring me, I want to fix my relationship as I can see the pain it causes when it feels there is no love there.

My best,

Jay

Hi jay

Im glad my expetion can help with yoyr relationship (sorry for spelling havent slept lately)

But always remember its not always the big things that make the diffrents as ive told my partner its the little things that make me happy

May it be hand on leg while taking a drive

Holding hands while walking around street shops

saying i love you just randomly cause you can

May it be even while shes cooking walking up and giving her a hug and kiss from behind

Or just giving hugs kisses just because

Just having someone to make you feel so special with simple things is amazing just wish my partner never stopped i use to always feel like i was the only woman in the world

Hi leelee1994,

It breaks my heart because it is what happened to us unfortuntly and you are right the little things make the biggest difference, I am trying my hardest to do it all now, we just lost the spark I guess is the word.

I am glad to read you and your husband are slowly getting there and taking it step by step, I said that to my wife, I said we need to take it day by day and let it flow naturally.

My best,

Jay

hey jay

Yes it is hard but as ive told my partner if this is going to work we need to work together to get it there

as its not always easy with kids house work small jobs animals etc his work scedual always changing but it will get harder when kids start school and i finally start work we both will be working and when not working we have stuff at home that will need attetion so we will not have alot of time for each other

But in saying that i have also told him that every spear second you have to at least say i love you or even a kiss and back to doing whatever it is every little detail counts

Well when it comes to no time at all for anything really but thats my outlook on things as my oartner and i have diffrent out looks on everything but as i put it its got to be the age diffrents when it comes to his way and my way as we are diffrent people in diffrent state of age mind really

Xx

Hi Leelee

When I was away on an overseas aid assignment last year, my wife did some minor home renovations. One thing she did was paint the wall where our bedhead is, light blue. She then got from somewhere, some printing which says "Always kiss me goodnight" and posted it on the wall above the bedhead. It has stayed there and even when we are too bust during the day to say or do anything affectionate, it has become the last thing I do each evening before I turn off the light and go to sleep. It is amazing how one simple step starts to address what was becoming a very humdrum relationship