FAQ

Find answers to some of the more frequently asked questions on the Forums.

Forums guidelines

Our guidelines keep the Forums a safe place for people to share and learn information.

Announcement Icon
You can win one of three $200 gift cards. Complete our survey by 5pm, 30 June 2024 AEST to enter the draw. Your response will be anonymous so you can't be identified.

"I'm Tired" excuse for poor behaviour

BoHellova
Community Member

I have exhausted most avenues.. and find my self here.

My husband has been "tired" for over two years now. I have begged and pleaded for him to get help.

Its really hard living with someone who is negative, grumpy and apathetic 95% of the time.

I find myself thinking about leaving him... I am a happy person, optimistic but I have started not enjoying being around him. He is draining me and our boys with negativity. I wouldn't be thinking and feeling this way if he started to take some responsibility for his health and behaviour, I would be supporting him. I am exhausted trying...

I know he has to be the one to want to seek help but at the sake of our family?

Torn, scared, feeling alone and with no options.

2 Replies 2

white knight
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hi bo, welcome

You are in a tough situation. I personally dont understand why people dont seek help. Its beyond me.

One suggestion I have is that you ask him to go to relationship counseling with you. If he doesn't want to go then go yourself on the reason you are going to learn techniques to cope with his behaviour. Attend the counseling but if he enquires what happened dont reveal it. If he wants to know he can attend.

Treat that process as a means to survive your family unit not a means to make things tougher for him.

please google the following for some reading

Topic: who cares for the carer- beyondblue

Topic: is there room for stubborness? - beyondblue

Topic: does stubborness have a place? - beyondblue

Tony WK

geoff
Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni
hello BoHellova, I agree with Tony and what he has said, and maybe I can tell you what my wife (ex) did with me as I was the same as your husband but self medicating with alcohol, but she realised there was nothing more she could do for me, my depression wasn't getting any better plus I was a drunk, so she decided that all she could do was leave me, now I only drink socially for several reasons, but mainly because I don't need to and definitely don't want to.
Depression was the cause of all of this and once I started living by myself my depression started to lift and that was some 13 or so years ago.
You have to look after yourself that's always your first priority. Geoff.