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Not sure what to do: Boyfriend’s family at risk of harm.

meekamoo
Community Member

I would prefer to not say my name as I am posting this on behalf of my boyfriend Ty.

For starters, I’m turning 18 in September and Ty doesn’t turn 18 until December. We are both in year 12 completing our HSC.

Here’s a little background information about myself - I come from a sticky situation at home, where family violence and drugs have been involved, hence part of the reason why I have moved out of home and in with my boyfriend because of all the drama. I have been with Ty for 2 years now, and living with him for about 3 months. Over the last 2 years I have seen Ty, his mother, and his two younger siblings being emotionally abused by their father. Particularly, Ty’s mum and himself when Ty stands up for his mum. Ty’s mum and dad are no longer together, but are still living under the same roof. He is a schizophrenia who doesn’t take his medication and is constantly abusing everyone mentally; to the point where we have to lock ourselves in a room. He manipulates people to make them think that Ty’s mum is a bad parent. He calls her names to her face and stands over the top of her. She’s ashamed to tell her family that he is still living in the house. Ty wants to love his dad despite Ty’s fathers behaviour, but he struggles to because of the way he treats his mum. Ty’s younger siblings are scared of their dad, and so am I. Ty’s mum has called the police once since me being in Ty’s life as Richard threatened Ty and physically harmed him. The police ended up leaving and saying that it is justifiable chastisement - all being Ty’s father got in their ear and said that Ty’s mum is a bad parent and he just wants to discipline his children correctly. This emotional abuse has been going on for a very long time, apparently longer than what I’ve seen and been around. I have no doubt that this is true. My heart aches for this family so please help. We need all the help we can get.

3 Replies 3

Sophie_M
Moderator
Moderator
Hi Meekamoo, 

We are sorry to hear that you and your boyfriend’s family are going through a difficult time and feel that the family is at risk of harm. Our Support Service are trying to reach you via email as we are worried about you. If you are in immediate danger, please call 000.

If you're not in immediate danger, we encourage you to reach out to our Support Service to discuss your thoughts and feelings with one of our professional mental counsellors: 1300 22 4636 (24/7) or webchat (3pm-midnight AEST) www.beyondblue.org.au/getsupport

hey sophie_m, thankyou for your assistance. however, the police have been called on numerous occasions for them and they don’t do anything. Ty’s father always seems to get into their ear and switch the story around - even if it is 5 people to 1. he is really good at manipulating a situation and making it sound believable so he gets out of trouble.

Hi Meekamoo, 

We appreciate you checking back in with us. It must be frustrating to feel as if no one is on your side. Please know that you are not alone in this. Again, our Support Services are available 24/7 by phone on 1300 22 4636, if you would like to talk things through. Relationships Australia is also another great resource that offers advice and services related to relationship/family issues, you can reach them on 1300 364 277 or https://www.relationships.org.au/