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Moving to a new state?

Community Member
Hey guys, have a quick read of a couple of my other threads to get a bit of background info.
I've got something I'm struggling with at the moment. I'm living with my partner, have been since March 2019, and I just don't know how I'm feeling about it anymore. I really don't think I'm ready to settle down like this, it's kind of freaking me out. I'm only 22 and I want to date more and you know.. live my youth a bit more? But at the same time I think, should I do that? Do I want that? Dating could be crap but I just don't know if this person is 'the one'.

My parents are moving away. I currently live in Sydney and so do they, but I've got a lot of history here with some pretty bad bullying and it went pretty viral. I'm concerned that if I break up with him that I'll lose a lot of my friends and I just don't want to deal with that either so I'm just unsure of what to do here. A part of me wants to go with my parents to Hobart (?) Because I don't think I'm ready to be away from them either. But I'm also worried about the career opportunity and salaries in Hobart as Sydney has way more opportunity and higher paying jobs. I work in operations and the median that I'd get paid is 46k + super.

So break up and move? Break up and stay? Don't break up and stay? I just don't know.

Some advice.. please! I'm desperate. And really just panicking.
1 Reply 1

Champion Alumni
Champion Alumni

Dear Licudfox,

On reading your post, I had a little idea pop into my head; perhaps you could consider moving to Melbourne, which is/could be kind of like a 'happy medium' between Sydney and Tassie, yeah?

You would still be sort of close to your parents, because maybe flights and/or travel to Tassie might be a bit cheaper from Melbourne than from Sydney, you would be getting perhaps some of that independence that you are thinking about, and also the median wage in Melbourne would hopefully be relatively comparable to that of Sydney wages.

As for the question of what you should actually do, well, no-one can really tell you that. Should you stay? Should you go? Only you can decide. After all, you are an adult now. However, maybe it would pay to put down on paper a list of pros and cons as to how Staying in Sydney might compare with moving to Melbourne or even Tasmania?

And one last thing, if you do move, or stay or whatever, my suggestion would be to give yourself 12 months to adjust to whatever decision you made, with the 'get-out-free' option after the 12 months. There is nothing wrong with putting an idea 'on trial'. Let's say you move to Tassie and decide you don't like it. At least then you could say you gave it a go. Nothing has to be written in stone. Life is full of opportunity!

Anyway, I don't know if that helps or not? I hope it does help a little.

If it helps to know; I moved house 19 times in a 7 year period, and have had a whole bunch of different jobs along the way too. And I live to tell the tale!

I guess what I'm trying to say is what Helen Keller said once; "Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing at all." And if she can see life as a 'daring adventure' without the ability to see or hear (she was blind and deaf, just in case you didn't know, and her story is amazing!) then so too can you.

All the best in whatever decision you do make. And remember, you can post your progress on here if you want to, just to share the journey and know that you don't have to go it alone.

Take care. I'll be thinking of you. xo