Find answers to some of the more frequently asked questions on the Forums.

Forums guidelines

Our guidelines keep the Forums a safe place for people to share and learn information.

Lost, need directions.

Community Member

Hey guys, this is my first post so I'm reaaaally nervous and don't know really how to do this but this girl needs advice quick.

I'm 23, I'm currently suffering with Manic depression, chronic fatigue syndrome, muscle deasese and nerve and joint damage..

I'm living out of home with my sister who currently needs someone to stay with her to help look after my niece and pay for rent... (I get centrelink couldn't work with my condition) if my Mum moves out with her boyfriend I'll be paying a lot more money then if i went to a share house..but I'm in a pickle because if i did that I'll be leaving her to suffer... when also her partner just moved out a couple of weeks ago, so she would be paying full rent on her own being a single parent.

I pay alot of money with my condition

Physio/Chrio/pain killers/strapping/knee braces,deep heat/heat packs/remedies etc. so $195 a week just makes me want to cry

I'm having a lot of identity crises and not knowing who i am and what I'm here for and thatone racks my brain a lot.

I'm having a lot of relationship problems with my partner not being able to let go of the past and accepting I'm willing to push my self through this depression and pain

Also family issues with lots of drama and fighting and hate and My mum not being around

I'm lost if i should go and be happy on my own for once counter my happiness or stick by everyone and help what they need.

I know this isn't that detailed but that's the run down of my life at the moment, i could literally write a book about it.

I need help on if i should keep my sister from falling and my partner and my family or me fall instead? 😕

2 Replies 2

white knight
Community Champion
Community Champion

Hi and welcome

I read your post a few times. I think its time you began looking after yourself.

I think also you need to no longer risk your sanity by putting up with all this fighting. If you withdraw you need a plan.

The following thread gives you some techniques with such a plan, to strike the best formula, to help you.

Use google

Topic: fortress of survival- beyondblue


Topic: the balance of your life- beyondblue

Topic: the financial world of snakes and ladders- beyondblue

You did well with your post. Post anytime

Tony WK

Community Member
Hi there erehmai,

Welcome to Beyond Blue and thank you so much for providing your post. You’ve sure got a lot happening and I hope it felt good, to actually get some of your issues down. That can sometimes be a bit therapeutic by doing that, as you list things and then can work through them, sort of on a dot point, by dot point basis.

As mentioned, you do have a lot going on now and I agree with Tony’s response … that you need to look after yourself, and it was good to see where he directed you to some helpful links.

So in order for you to do this and to keep yourself in a good place, have you got your own mechanisms in place? Like seeing your own GP, perhaps a psych? I would imagine so, as you mentioned the types of things that are plaguing you. Being lost and drawn between helping others and helping yourself, I think the answer has got to be the latter.

You need to focus on yourself big time … cause if you’re falling down and feeling absolute crap, how can you possibly have the strength and energy to try and help others?

Please post again.