Loneliness... What choices are there?

[demonblaster]

Loneliness is one of the cruelest underestimated places to be in life. Most of us need people.

This is all too common & wayyyy too many suffer this.

What's out there to help people?

Forums is a good place for many that are shy or depressed and not comfortable face on.

Excercising outside, amongst people, eye contact often connects a smile with people. Lifting

Here & assuming other places in Oz there's through community centres volunteers that visit, take shopping, talk, listen etc or phone calls weekly. (GP would know more)

Public transporting, around people, even if not engaged in convo, still amongst it

Interested hearing suggests

This shouldn't be

[startingnew]

i think some will be able to relate to this.. often i feel alone even in a room full of people. does anyone else get like that? its a rather strange feeling. i have all these people around me so really im not 'alone' but when your crowded by those who dont understand you or blame you it can feel like the lonliest place in the world.

i like the steps that Feeling Lonley has suggested in becoming less alone. very simply written.

Hello to all here, hoping your all finding ways to feel less alone in this world and to amuse and cope the best you can xox

[Feeling_Lonely]

Aw thanks startingnew 🙂

Ive come to realise there is such a massive difference between being alone and feeling lonely. I used to be one of those people that really craved my alone time and now I almost dread it because of the loneliness. Well, I live alone so I certainly get plenty of it. For me it’s about learning to be okay being alone again and not letting the negative thoughts consume me.

There has definitely been an improvement and having those three little things to aim for every month has certainly helped.

This week I really want to start to get a better control over my procrastination and lack of motivation for most things; particularly exercise, housework and generally looking after myself. I know getting back to the gym will help with the loneliness and my mental health in general. Let’s hope I can overcome the nasty procrastination blues! Does anyone have any tips for this?

[demonblaster]

Hi everyone 🙂 I hope even if some people get some reprieve from loneliness knowing that here on BB they're not alone with their pain and real people are listening and talking.

Starts: Hey darlin, so true in a room full of people we can still be lonely. Very sad. I hold hope that in time unfortunately probably slowly but as long as we do get there I guess that's what counts this will change.
Sad they say how can people be lonely in a world with a population of 7.6 billion people.

Yes thanks for asking that Starts..."the nasty procrastination blues! Does anyone have any tips for this?"
I suffer from this to extremes so am interested in any input too.

Feeling Lonely 🙂 Hi again thanks I too got valuable food for thought out of that.

Quote "This year I have set myself an intention to do 3 things every month, they are:
- Go somewhere new
- Try something new
- Meet someone new"

Admittedly it's been procrastination but I nearly did do what I love doing, go for a swim since reading this a few days ago, can't remember why I didn't but intend to. I like this and am going to at least try and set my 3 up.

A lot of sense in the following I thought too
Quote: The reason I have framed it as an intention rather than a goal is so I won’t feel like I’ve failed if I don’t achieve it.

Taking the pressure off and within a month. I will take from that again thank you 🙂

Yes alone time can be very dangerous on an unwell mind.
Agree there's a vast difference being alone to being lonely. I too am still getting use to living alone. Fortunately I have a few friends family and people contact on walking and being out but not every one does.

What can help? ... working on liking our own company, we spend every nano second with it so if we look deep for our good points confidence can grow. Build our buried strength that's there inside.

Thanks to Dools one of our amazing CC's Community champion here mentioned she goes to a Craft group at the local library.

Thanks for your time input and listening everyone 🙂

[Ggrand]

Hello Deebi and everyone,

Im wondering what people who live alone do of a night time... especially if their is no outside entertainment closer then 75 kilometres away on half unsealed roads where kangaroos are like peak hour traffic...What are your suggestions, what do you do every night to keep you busy.. for that matter what about daytime what do you do through the day...remembering the distance and fuel I need to travel even go to get milk..

Im really interested to hear what keeps you and your thoughts busy..

Grandy..

[bronte]

Hello All,

Ggrand,

Sounds wonderful where you are, i bet the stars are bright at night.

I try and keep busy with projects,cooking, crosswords or knitting.

I wouldnt be without my dog for walks or conversations either ☺️

It still gets lonely at times. I am looking forward to hearing everyone elses ideas.

Cheers,

Bronte

[Guest_1584]

Hi db and all.

Db l think your too hard on yourself from what l read. Your doing great you see people and have things going on , you got a lot going on here at bb too , and you set yourself goals, pat yourself on the back l say, really.

l make myself little promises too. l try to see at least one person , well a part from my daughter , each week. Sometimes l might see 4 or 5 , more , last week was like that, this week, nothin. l also try to go out most days even if just the shop and over to one of the other towns, take my time wonder around at least a few times a wk too . Weekends l try to make myself go somewhere one day of the weekend , even if just for an hour or two.

Sometimes it all helps and gives me some feel good or l at least got out but others, l still end up the same , home alone in the end soooooo, l dunno, Sometimes to l end up thinking well, this seems to be my fate at the moment no matter what l do , maybe just stop fighting it and live it until whatever the universe wants to present me next comes along, just dunno.

Hiya grandy , how ya doin hope you've been ok. Sure know all about the distance thing isn't it a pain , on the budget , car , hell l even find tyres and they ain't cheap. l live on the edge of my town and l walk or drive up to the shops at least most days even if just to the supe. And then we have a few towns 25k or the main 50k . So l tend to duck and weave to whichever depending what l need or feel like or budget and the rest . But there's really nothing going on anywhere much unless l go upto the main, 50 each way, plus driving all over the place when you get there it's pretty spread out.

rx

[Ggrand]

Hello Bronte, Randomx, Deebi and everyone else..

Thank you Bronte, for telling me what you do of a Night..

Stars out here are amazing, and i have two verandas that goes right across the front and back of the house..I often sit outside late at night and just look at the stars, silly as this sounds I even talk to them, I have no one here to tell my problems to so the poor stars are my release, A lot of nights I will fall asleep out front and wake to see a beautiful sunset...

I used to knit, embroidery, crotchet, I don't know no motivation any more..although I did get out my old knitting project the other week, I can do only half hour until I get so bored with it..but that got destroyed yesterday, by my 2 little fur buddies...

internet games are ok. But I don't know, I can't get involved deep enough to keep me doing something for more then 5 minutes, before I Keep switching to something else.. Tv, I'm not a fan unless it's a particular show on I want to watch, I will keep trying, I think I'm after something that I haven't tried as yet,,

Randomx, hiya I hope you are doing okay..Just in case you haven't been back to mine, I want to thank you very much for calling in and saying those encouraging suggestions and support when I wasn't doing to good...I owe you a big squishy hug 🤗..I know your okay with them..

I have to put my thinking 🎩 on...I need to change me...I need to keep my mind busy with doing things..Thank you both very much for your great suggestions, I will download a crossword app today.. I have 2 dogs but they won't walk with me, they won't wear their collars, lol 1 drops her head on the ground, like it weighs a ton, the other just stands their like she is a statue...lol poor little doggies..😂

Has anyone else got any weird or wonderful things they do of a night to keep themselves busy..what about internet games, what type do you play if you do and are they challenging..

Kind thoughts and very warm caring 🤗 hugs.

Grandy..

[bronte]

Hi Ggrand, Randomx, Demonblaster and everyone else 🙂

It sure sounds nice where you are Ggrand. I can visualise your dogs too 🙂.

I really appreciate reading all your posts, they help me to feel not so alone and it is okay.

Randomx, i like your idea about trying to get out every day, I will try to do that. I have recently moved from country to residential and you got me thinking, i think i am fighting it instead of just going with life. Food for thought.

I play Zelda Breath of the Wild, a Nintendo switch game, that distracts me for a while. I have a go at the playstation every now and then also.

I hope you are all having a good day.

Bronte

[Guest_1584]

Haha thanks grandy , no worries.

l've got one for ya , this wkend l'm painting, wait for it , an owl . Just happens l have a thing for owls and l found a Terra Cotta one up on the roof , yep . Previous owner put it up there to spook the possums. Well climbed up and got it the other day and be damned it's a great looking owl so this wkend l'm gonna paint it seems as it's about 12 degrees out and pouring.

Have a nice wkend people

rx

[demonblaster]

Hey Grandy, Bronte and Random good to see you all and readers ☺

Just a quicky atm.

For people that have distance from friends and relatives Skype is an option. Easy to set up.

In communities where there's little activity and distance to towns I wonder if there's a community centre if not it'd be good if someone started a card night or craft or social days, people could meet at different houses.

Bronte mentioned knitting which is apparently good for the mind. I guess the rythym and accomplishment too as well as different sections being used. It's a calming activity.

Hope your days are good

Bbl (be back later)