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living alone
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Wondering do you live alone if you don't mind me asking , and how long for , how do you find it ?
No need for any details if your not comfortable or anything like that, not prying just wondering about it all.
l've been living alone on off mostly 5yrs now since splitting with ex w. My daughter use to stay a lot but not much these days, 16, bf and friends over in her town, 20mins away . Also had a friend staying over a lot for awhile or me her place, separate rooms just friends. Then met my gf, together nearly two but 70% long distance,talking 24 7 non the mess but still mostly living alone. That ahsn't worked out and, still living alone.
It's the first time really since late teens and what a time of life for it to come along. l'm just wondering? l'm afraid l just can't get use to it or like it . Although times it's good also , like coming home tired, kick back for the night do your thing, watch what you want or sleep all day or listen to whatever you please as loud as you want day or night, no one else to worry about or please. It can be nice when the wk end rolls round too in ways , same reasons.
But , l still have a lot of trouble with it , don't think l'll ever get use to it. Even though there were plenty of times married would've given anything for this kinda freedom sometimes.
This house is pretty big , to me too big for one, one and a bit if my d stays. Not really into friends hangin round too often , assuming l had a few anyways, new town. But l think a smaller house would help , dunno how some people especially rich people live in monster mansions alone. l've even thought of sharing , got a spare room, it'd help the finances too. But tbh , getting a bit past that with a stranger and it'd cramp my style a bit and spoil the things l do like about this new life alone right now and having all this space to myself.
But over all , l'm really feeling the loneliness. Just don't know what to do about it though, how to deal with it . l feel like l'll get sorta lost in my own non existent world if l'm not careful. l do get out and about quite a bit actually but it's usually alone too. l've always enjoyed alone time even as a kid but l seem to have lost that these days and l find it's really taking it's toll on spirits and like life is passing by.
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l'm feeling like l'm just outa puff with it all now that l've been psychologically anyway stepping away.Although as l say it sounds like we still at it but really it hasn't been that much at all.Even those forms yesterday it sounds a lot but only took a minute to scan the important bits and translate back a few lines.
lt's not that she doesn't care about my end or what l'm upto she does no matter how much crap she has butttttt the realizations that l've somehow dealt with it all so long especially with the English is feeling like exhaustion now.
l know one thing if there's ever anyone else it'd be really nice if she 1, just had her life together but 2ndly spoke normal English. But then l think about all the couples and people with their lives so called together, they've still been through a lottaaa crap. Or there's kids, or sickness, or sisters haha cm , or MH or ex's or money or something soooo, dunno.And getting into the 50s there's grown up kids and their lives n marriages, their problems, their kids then but one way or another , hassle free is a pretty big ask .
l can dream though right.
rx
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Sisters...oh no lol.
You can dream. You can manifest. You can do whatever brings you happiness.
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Ahhhh, we have a saying about dreams, you've gotta have them.
Well, l have this weird feeling that coming on here moaning kinda turns things, somehow. Maybe it's subconsciously, or just getting it out of your head, or something, but it's happened before and now again.
We had a beautiful talk today. l was out kayaking this morning, the water always fixes me and l'm thinking, nothing's making sense from her this last wk or so, especially considering, and she's had this tone, it's all been really strange and weird. When l get home l'm calling her, and we'll talk.
So many things and new light but all is def' not as lost as l've thought and all making much more sense now. The short is though that she got some big news late last wk that changes a lot of things, and dramas to haha.
We're still absorbing though and we see, butttt, it's really good news .
rx
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Not sure how l'm feeling.
We had that really nice talk about everything last wkend and even came up with a new plan and her coming back down to mine. End of yr when she finishes a course. More's changed so she wants to now, well, this wk anyway.
Feeling warn out from it all , so much stuff for her and all these ups and downs 15mths now yet we've basically haven't even been together. Can't even count my last trip went so fast and didn't go too well either. But the non stop drama and changes have worn me out too and they're still going on, starting to think they'll never end can l even be bothered. All this long distance too not even sure we're us or she's the her l knew anymore.
rx
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l have a plan , we broke our break or whatever it was bc things changed her end and she couldn't wait to tell me, and it actually included a solution.
But l still need that break , l need it to figure out where l'm at . Oddly we've hardly talked this wk later now, after the last wkend and news.She's still stressed 24 7. lf l just continued on now especially with hardly talking this wk anyway, l don't really have to say a thing, just do it. Sooooo, l've been thinking about that last few days and l think l will. l just need to step back, feel things out , and l know if l do the light will come.
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Hey RX,
I’m sorry to hear the situation you’re in is a difficult one. And can see how it’s so draining over time, for sure.
Hope you get the chance to step back, practice some self care if possible. (Easier said than done, I know!)
Will say some more but mainly wanting to check in and see how you are doing? A bit concerned how all this is affecting you.
LL
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Hi LL , thank for dropping in, in on the saga of rx eh.
At least we can relax on the self care part haha, plenty of that going on, l'm probably spoiled compared to most.
But yeah , been a saga alright but l must admit most of it not even her doing or within her control though really. A lot too was depending on my last trip up but that mess up was actually my doing , she was great actually, l was a mess butttt , anyway.
l know what the real solution is far more than any break, to just see ea other again , just be together again , properly. That'll tell me and us what we need it's just been so long now and such a hard time right through especially for her .
Anywayyyy, so we'll probably do something in the next mth or so, can't right now. Take it from there.
All the best.
rx
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Isn't it funny how sometimes you need time together, not time apart. You need time together to see who you really are as a couple, without all the added circumstances.
I completely understand 😔
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God yeah exactly right cm.
Been no us time 15-16mths and all emotional energy and time has been used in just coping and getting through courts and dramas.
lt's weird how yours and my sitches are so different yet same effect. We have a solution anyway, that's looking really good actually but that's another 6mths away, more time and LD. l just need to know we're still us and that should clear it all up.
rx
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We just need that real time , just us , in bloody person , just like you guys.
Times just gone so fast and just gotten away . l'm so worried about wasting more time if l don't even know us anymore, l can't make such a big decision or just go on for even longer like this without just knowing is again first.
rx