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I s it Lack of sex that's bringing me down

Community Member

Hi like a few of the posts on here I have a marriage that has a low sex drive. We have been together for 29 years and when we do make love it is still great but it is not as frequent as either of us would like. We cannot get our libidos to line up I love my wife very much still and I know she love me to. I do shift work and I find it turns out that she will be in the mood and I fall asleep not knowing only to find out the next day that she is frustrated. Other times I will be all over her only to find out the moment is gone. This can end up going on for months and ends up with us both pulling our hair out. We have tried some things to help but things just don't seem to work out. We have tried to schedule it but we both hate that way to organised and not in the moment. Neither of us are into the date night thing again to organised. We have done the sexting thing and that worked for a while but now we find that by time we go to bed the moment is gone. I have got to the point where it is affecting my moods and I find myself more depressed than normal. I guess I wanted to know if anyone else has had something like this and what they found worked. I would particularly be interested to find out if any of the ladies have any suggestions as a woman's perspective would be great


1 Reply 1

Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member

How to get your woman to want it when you want it? and vice-versa.

I think every man on the face of the planet wants to know the answer to that question. 🙂

Seriously though, I think if we make ourselves available, and able, to partake, when they want to partake, is about all any of us can do. And it probably wouldn't hurt to have yourself in a desirable state when you do go to bed (i.e. showered, clean teeth, shaven if that's her thing, nudied up, whatever gets her going), and don't fall asleep until after she does.

If you do find out the answer, let us know.

Good luck mate