hello and welcome.
I'm truly sorry to hear that your family is going through such a difficult time. It sounds like there's a lot of (pain and) frustration in the relationships between your husband and son, and I can understand how concerning this would be, and add to the situation with your son's struggles at university. 😞
I can see from your post that you care deeply for both your husband and son, and it's challenging to see them in this situation. Encouraging a conversation between them is a thoughtful suggestion, but I also understand the reluctance your son might be feeling.
Perhaps, expressing your own feelings about the situation to both of them, emphasizing the love and concern you have for your family, might be a starting point - letting them know that you're there to facilitate a conversation?
And if that does not work...
It might also be beneficial to explore the possibility of seeking professional help, such as family counseling, where a neutral third party can guide the conversation and provide support to all involved.
I hope your family finds a way to come together and work through these challenges.
Listening if you want to chat some more.
PS. I don't know what happened with your son getting suspended and your husband's reaction.... I can guess, but part of me wonder if your son is afraid to talk about what happened or happening. It takes a lot of courage to open up and whether your son is ready is another question.
