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How to move on from a break-up after 8years?

Community Member
So this is it. My world turned upside down. After a year of my mum fighting cancer, dog dying, watching my Nan die, I am now trying to deal with feeling so heartbroken and alone. So alone. Moved back home to mum and dads, but they are overseas. Also left my 2 beloved cats with my partner. It's day 5. I'm so alone and in pain. Pain like I've never felt before. The sadness is unbearable. Any valuable tips on making new habits and routines as a newly single?
6 Replies 6

Community Member
I  really feel for you everything seems to be against you. We all go through bad times and there seems no end to it so most people will understand what you are going through i am no expert but you need to talk to someone who will understand  WishI had more answes.

Community Member
my wife of ten years has had an affair with the next door neighbour whilst i was working 4/1. I have two kids 6/7 I'm in a dark place right now but if you want to talk. ill be happy to. I'm lonely to. meet up is a good site to check out. Hope your ok mate.

Thankyou for your input. It's a terrible time. Having to make new routines, overcome overwhelming lonliness etc. it's just the beginning. I wish I could go to sleep and not wake up for a while. Is the site called 'meet-up'? 

Thankyou so much for your reply. It means a lot to just get someone else's words and opinions/advice. Just to be able to talk about it is really helpful. 8 years of habits and being next to someone, sharing the same bed, adventures together. All done and dusted. I said my final goodbye to him today, and said goodbye to the cats

Community Member
So this afternoon I gathered my last things from the house, said good bye to my beloved cats, and said goodbye to him. I asked him uncomfortable questions for me. I asked him how long he had been thinking about it (a long time). I am CONSUMED by guilt that I have made someone so unhappy for so long, even though I was having similar thoughts. He had no idea I was having those thoughts, so I just made him miserable in his eyes. GUILT.

Hi SehBear3, we can hear from your post that you are really struggling, you have shown a lot of courage and strength already in the adversity you have faced, and break ups can be extremely hard, you have recognised numerous issues with day to day life already and it sounds like you are making some positive choices in regards to your struggles. We want you to know that you are not alone, we are here for you at anytime of the day and night.

We are a bit concerned about your statements around wanting to go to sleep and not wake up for while, if you are currently at risk we support you to reach out to keep yourself safe.

If you are feeling suicidal it is important that you take immediate steps to keep yourself safe. You can do this by:
• Speaking to your doctor or psychologist if he or she is available right now
• Calling the Mental Health Team in your state (number provided offline)
• If, however, you feel unable to keep yourself from acting on your thoughts about suicide this is an emergency and you need to call 000 (triple zero).

We are always available to support you. If you would like to speak to one of our Counsellors we encourage you to call the beyondblue Support Service on 1300 22 4636. We can help 24 hours a day, 7 days a week with counselling support, information and referrals. We also have web chat service available from 3pm-midnight 7 days a week.