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Fighting the narc in court

Community Member

Is this something anyone else is going through at the moment? I've been in this battle for the past three years and seriously find the legal system a joke.

24 Replies 24

Community Member


My wife of 3.5 years to whom of which we have 2.5 yr son has left me whilst i was not home and kidnapped my son. She since she become pregnant had started creating problems for trivail things and creating different versions of reality. As our son came along, i was not able to hold or care from him, family would not be allowed to visit and also not allowed to care for him, basically limiting any chance of a relaitionship with my immediate family. Constantly would become enraged and one 4 oocassions physically assualted me and other forms of domestic violence. I was not allowed to see my friends or have friends see our son. She did nothing around the house or contributing to family or our sons income, her sole responsibilty was our son and she did not deviate from that and that was her justification. I would endure consta t belittling even around people. She would say things i cant leave you with the baby alone and as a mother im more worthy and he doesnt need his father. Im the provider for the home and she was mostly a stay at home mum. Since she has left i have found she has been secretly recording me and in the conversation forcing me to say things i never said and threathening to leave me if i didnt admitt to it, which i never did. She has fabricated a web of lies to enter womans refuge in melbourne and placed an ivo against me (when served to me the police officer laughed) as he told me he doesnt see much in this (she played a good damsel in distress to the officer she asked to issue). Ive tried over the 3 years seeking support from panda, doctors, physocollogist but nothing has helped. I tried my best to keep the family togother for the sake of my son. In the end i havent seen or had any contact from my soon in over 6 weeks and its heartbreaking, the hardest thing ive ever had to do. My lawyer has raised a recovery order thru the court and that wont be till feb and is only with a registrar that has no powers. Ultimately im going to not see my son for 3 months realistically. If anyone has been thru something similar or can provide some advice id be forever grateful

Community Member

I have been married for 13 years and have a wonderful daughter who I would do anything for. My wife lies, reinvents the truth, financially and verbally abuses me and my daughter. My physical, mental and financial health has deteriorated significantly over the last 13 years and whilst I have stayed to ensure the protection of my daughter, I worry that if I stay, I will die and will no longer be able to protect my daughter. As such, when my wife moved out at the end of last year because I would not apologise for cleaning up when she would not, I started divorce proceedings. She had said that she would not move back in until I apologised for not letting her treat me as a doormat. Unfortunately she did.

Now we will be heading to mediation and then perhaps arbitration or through the court system.

I know she will lie, distort the truth, make up stories, etc. However, I would be very appreciative if anyone who has some experience with a narc in mediation, arbitration or court who could provide me some tips on what to expect and any ideas how to deal with what comes up.


It's important not to give a narcissist any fuel.

Short, cold, firm responses. Do not engage with them and let the mediator deal with them.

Hi, welcome

My kids were 7 and 4yo when my 1st wife and I separated. For the next 5 years I paid all child support then at 12yo my eldest came to live with me. The turmoil, revenge continued. When my youngest reached 18 I sent her mother a text to never contact me again.

Unfortunately my youngest turned out worse so I don't see her.

My message is, to take the view that

  • You are not responsible for another's actions
  • That it's best to be the best parent you can be
  • Admit fault but call out bad behaviour

Google this

Queen witch hermit waif

That might help


Hi Burnt. 

id like to know the process you went through to get your children interstate? This is something I am considering atm.