Find answers to some of the more frequently asked questions on the Forums.

Forums guidelines

Our guidelines keep the Forums a safe place for people to share and learn information.

Feeling alone

Community Member

Hi. I'm new here. Married with 3 boys all at home (23, 21, 18). My husband has cancer, it has made him, understandably, moody and self absorbed and very short fused. We are stepping on eggshells all the time. He's quite proud and a black and white thinker and won't consider counselling or medication.

Basically im really struggling and feeling like I'm holding everyone up. I'm fairly anxious at the best of times and not very good at asking for help because I've got low self esteem and have always thought you had to put on a happy face or your friends won't like you or want to be around you.

i don't know whether I'm depressed or whether it's just part of motherhood to be constantly worrying about your kids, whether they're happy, whether they have enough friends, whether I should have done more as a mother to make them happy.

im at a bit of a loss. We don't know my husband's prognosis because the doctors never say much, he's grumpy and unhappy, I'm worried about him and my kids, especially my youngest who's in year 12, and really feeling quite bad myself.

3 Replies 3

Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member
Hi there lovely and welcome. Glad to have u with us im sorry to hear of ur hubby's illness mine has chrons disease so i guess I can empathize to some degree. It's never easy when ur loved one is ill and they do definitely think they r invincible sometimes stubborn at times as well and not a fan of the good old doc. If ur finding it hard to talk to ur hubby i would write to him let him walk away and absorb it in his own time. If u urself r concerned about you then i would take a trip to the gp and have a good old chat about ur anxieties and worries u have us here and also our 24 hr hotline that is available to you. Please don't feel as if ur alone to face this bc ur not. Please keep posting here we r all here to help you xx nice to have spoken with you xx Venessa

Thank you for your kind reply. I may well use the hotline. 😊

Blue Voices Member
Blue Voices Member