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Hi leelee,
It sounds as though this decision was essential for your wellbeing and safety. Violence and mistreatment should not have to be tolerated by anyone, so I'm glad you have been able to leave this unhealthy relationship. It would be worthwhile making an appointment with your GP to discuss your mental health and wellbeing. They may suggest a referral to someone for more specific support.
In addition to seeing a health professional and talking to family and/or close friends, helplines are a great way to get support. Beyondblue's 24/7 helpline is on 1300 22 4636. I've tried this service before and found it helpful.
Best wishes,
Zeal
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Hello Leelee
So much pain in your life already. I think, like Zeal, moving away from your partner is necessary for your health and well-being. It's always hard when a relationship turns bad, and then you remember the happy times and want to go back. I hope you find the courage and strength to start your life again in a place without the BF and keep him out of your life.
You can find a new, good life I assure you. It will take time and hard work but it's definitely achievable. You will find yourself wanting to make up because you miss him so much, but don't be fooled. Inevitably it's worse because you have shown you need him and that is something he can manipulate you about.
I suggest you visit your GP and ask for a referral to a counsellor of some description to address your domestic violence issues.
Love to hear more from you.
Mary
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Hi Leelee
It sounds like your partner or ex-partner needs to be restrained and made to realise he cannot do this. Have you thought of taking out a restraining order on him so that you can be protected from him?
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Hello Leelee
This is really dreadful. Can you go to the police and make a complaint of assault against him? and take out DVO, domestic violence order. He should be the one to leave not you. You need a home for yourself and the children. How old are the children? It is as damaging for them as it is for you to live with violence. Have you explored going to a women;s refuge? The police can tell you where your local hostel is. You will be safe there and have time to sort your life out.
I know this sounds easy and it most certainly is not easy. Try the hostel if you can. Sadly they are often full but it's worth a try.
Please go to your GP or police while you still have bruises etc as this can be evidence of his violence. Also you need to be checked for other damage. I will ask some of the other champions with more knowledge in this area to write to you.
Mary
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Hi mary
Off to gp in the morning staying at mums for a while got my brother sister and sister inlaw helping look for a house for my boys and i my oldest child understands so much it hurts me because i cant hide anything and i cant lie to him he even told me (mum go docter now please) kind had to say i cant mate its dark out been 10 at night mind you he cant sleep or be good or even eat properly when he knows something wromg with me my youngest is almost 3 and my oldest wil be 5 this year cant hide a great deal from him
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So pleased to hear you are going to see your doctor. I hope she/he will be helpful and supportive.
Yes, children are very perceptive and easily hurt.Your boys will need lots of support from you and your family to help them put all this stuff in perspective. You may want to discuss this with your doctor.
Glad you are away from the BF and staying with your mom. Isn't it great having a mother to care for you? My mom died 17 years ago and I am a grandma, but I still miss her. It seems we never appreciate our mom until we become adults ourselves.
I would like to know how you go with the GP, but only as much as you are willing to share.
Mary
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Hey am doing alittle better all in all is turning into a court order but oh well hell get what is needed to stay away from us am trying hard for my boys have been aroumd friends and family in the last couple of days has help both boys and i on the whole situation my oldest child is starting to become happyer and is less worried about me thats for sure his been seen his cousins his been aroind a few of my male friends i havent seen in months because of bf and tomorrow is a play date with a few more kids the same age group oldest will be 6 and youngest will be 1 so hopefully while kids are having fun running aroind and playing i can also get a few things off my mind
Dr has told me that he will need to see me within a week as with all the bruising will be harx to tell if there is any real problem unless theysend me to tamworth for a couple day witch aint happening cause i cant take my kids but i have to keep ice on all bruising and my leg needs to stay elivated as much as possible and to take things steady as may have blood clots in my leg and eye as i cant read an eye chart with my left eye at this point but also if my eye doesnt come good i may need something done as he may have rupshed one of my blood vesals in my eye or around my eye and also if my head starts hurting any more then normal threw the day i need to go to hospital asap as maybe damage to my skull/brain and am not to bend over or lift anything as my spin is not looking the greatest at all witch is hard with a 2 year old but gotta listen to him i guess incass it does get worse