The Melbourne CBD tragedy - dealing with the emotional impact of a traumatic event

[Chris_B]

Hi everyone,

I was in Bourke St yesterday and spent time at the community memorial outside the old GPO building. Flowers and cards covering the pavement, crowds of people just standing and taking it all in.

To anyone reading who may be feeling overwhelmed or distressed by the tragedy that has occurred, this is a space to share your thoughts and get support.

Below are some tips taken from the beyondblue resource "Emotional responses after a disaster":

DO
* Spend time with people who care
* Give yourself time
* Find out about the impact of trauma and what to expect
* Try to keep a routine going, eg. work, study
* Return to normal activities
* Talk about how you feel or what happened when ready
* Do things that help you relax
* Do things that you enjoy
* Set realistic goals - don't take on too much, but try to find goals that keep you motivated
* Review and reward progress - notice even the small steps
* Talk about the ups and downs of recovery with friends, family and the health professionals involve in your care
* Have a plan to maintain positive changes and plans to deal with times of stress or reminders of the trauma

DON'T
* Use alcohol or drugs to try and cope
* Keep yourself busy and work too much
* Engage in stressful family or work situations
* Withdraw from family and friends
* Stop yourself from doing things that you enjoy
* Avoid talking about what happened
* Take risks

[Kazzl]

Hi Chris, thank you for posting this. I think those coping strategies are really useful - worth remembering in any time of tragedy or personal distress.

The events in Melbourne were so shocking, and all the moreso I think when you know the place where it happened. My heart goes out to everyone who's hurting or fearful at the moment.

While events such as this create extreme emotions of fear, anger, and despair, there is one positve thing we should try to cling to - the way they also create community, kindness and compassion.

I was in New York around the first anniversary of 9/11, and I was in Sydney staying opposite Martin Place only days after the Lindt Cafe seige ended. At both places I felt a softness and compassion in the crowds gathered to lay flowers, and even just walking through the streets. Sadness too of course, but a quiet, collective gentleness, amongst thousands of people.

For me, that sort of experience reinforces my belief in the goodness of people and humanity generally at a time when we can easily believe evil has won. It hasn't. It won't.

My love and kind thoughts to all our Melbourne people and anyone else who's suffering. Be kind to yourselves and each other, and as Chris said, if you want to talk, we're here.

Kaz

[Wilma1]

Thank you for this thread. I get caught up in events like this, the pain and confusion of why??? But your words Kaz of the gentleness you experienced in the crowds, evil won't win. Thank you. Wishful

[Kazzl]

Hello lovely lady - so good to see you. I truly believe it won't my friend. But the fear of it can play havoc with our minds. Somehow, we have to minimise the effects on us so they don't take a poisonous hold. I have no magic antidote, but for me believing in goodness, and actively looking for it, is the best I can do.

And I see such goodness in you Wishful. Much love to you hun.

Kaz

xx

[MarkJT]

Very well said Kazzl. There is no doubt whatsoever that people do come together in times of emergencies. For the most part people walk around minding their own business but when someone needs help, they will get it. In this case, 1,000's came to help.

I was working during the 2009 bushfires and the amount of calls i got from the public wanting to help was so brilliantly awesome, it was very humbling taking them.

That is what we do, we help and we heal together.

The city is injured, people are uneasy but we will, as a collective community rally around each other, help each other and we will heal together.

Mark.

[Wilma1]

Kaz, I see such goodness in you too. Thank you special lady. Wishful