Ptsd sexual abuse

[Luna1111]

I found out about a year & half ago that my mother molestered me... i was very young & must have blocked it out But i remembered. After i remembered i told one person who then told other people. I have been so distressed & traumatised not only by what my mother did but by the person telling other people. Its taken this long to try and face it. My mother doesnt know that i have remembered but im getting ready to confront her... i want to move on with my life without her in it.

[MarkJT]

Luna, welcome to the forums and well done for posting. That takes some decent courage and especially with what you have been through. You will never ever be judged in here and will be supported without doubt.

I was diagnosed with PTSD, depression and anxiety in Feb 2013 and have recovered quite well since. I undertook a course of exposure therapy which i reacted to really well which drove my recovery.

What you have been through is horrific, there is no hiding that. No child should ever go though what you have.

I would really like it if you went and got yourself a psych appointment, maybe through your GP or you can do it independently. What you are planning to do, is going to take a toll on you so to have psych support there to help you through will be hugely beneficial. We can help you here with advice and support but you may need proper clinical care to get you through it.

PTSD can be highly debilitating but you can recover. There are few things that i did that i consider quite important to recover.

• Mindfulness - if you do not know about it, it is a type of meditation and it is brilliant. There are some good apps to help you guide you through it. Smiling Mind is the one that i use daily. It is all about living in the present, not the past nor the future. It is really calming.
• Exercise. If you can, go for a run, a ride, a swim, a walk, a hike. What ever it is, get body movement. Really important.
• Diet. See if you can cut out some bad food and drinks. Lower or cut alcohol and high sugar drinks.
• Control the controllable's. If it is out of your control, try and not dwell on it. Like other people finding out. I have never been in your situation of being abused so i do not know what that is like. All i can say is that a good person will realise that you were so young and really had no choice in the matter so they will treat you no different than when they didn't know what happened to you.
• Do the small things right. Every little thing you can do to advance your physical health will help you in the long run with your mental health.
• If you do go and see a psych, open up and be honest. If you give them all the information, they will be able to treat you better. I can almost guarantee that the psych you see has heard exactly your story from others in the past so have confidence in doing it.

I really like how you say that you want to move on with your life. Tells me that you are ready to recover.

Keep posting and let me know how you are going.

Mark

[Fairywings]

Hi and welcome Sweety I too am a survivor of childhood sexual abuse my cousin did it to me he was 19 at the time I was just 8 years old it went on for 5 years 😞 and now I am here too helping you. I'm so proud of you for wanting to confront her that is showing ur inner self you r ready to take control of your life again I know you can do this. I say this bc I too confronted my cousin when he least expected it, I stopped him from attending his own nephews baptism 🙂 such power it gives you knowing that control is yours again not your abusers, you will not regret it and now he is living the misery I did for over 20 yrs. I am so sorry you had to go through this and then to have this other person betraying your trust. My abuse taught me one very valuable lesson in life "trust no one" hypothetically you know what i mean in here ur safe you can trust us 🙂 to avoid being hurt again and taken adv of. once you decide to take the plunge and confront her just remember ur not alone you have us you have the hotline if u need to get yourself to the GP for a psychologists referral to have reg chats too if you feel comfortable enough in doing so xx please come back to us take care Venessa xx

[MarkJT]

Luna & Venessa, just wanted to let you two know that i think that you are so unbelievably strong, resilient and brilliant women. I have so much respect for you. To do what you do after such vile acts where committed against you, nothing but massive respect.

Keep doing what you do, you are setting such an awesome example and empowering so many women who read this thread and others that you are involved in.

Thank you.

Mark.

[Fairywings]

Ahhhh thanks mark u words mean the world xx this shit unfortunately does make us stronger ur right there r so many it happens too 😓 i am a youth worker and prodominantley worked with young people back in my days and a majority had abuse and addiction issues that were plauging their beautiful souls and i knew just by being there to listen and help that was more than what they could ever ask for and for someone to believe in them and believed that it happened this is another very harsh reality we abuse survivors go through but like i said once we gain the control we become unstoppable 😍 this work is in my blood and I just love to help and support others in their darkest hours xx thanks so much mark venessa

[pipsy]

Dear Luna 11111. Congratulations for having the courage to tell someone. Confiding in someone/anyone re: sexual abuse is incredibly difficult. When the parent is the abuser, it's worse because our parents are supposed to protect us. Then you were further betrayed by the person you confided in. I too am a survivor, so I can also sympathize with your dilemma. Perhaps before you confront your mum, it might be an idea to jot down a few things in case your nerves tongue-tie you. You are confronting the mother who hurt you, so you could get nervous being as how we are supposed to 'honor' these people. I hope you haven't been further betrayed by other well-meaning people telling her you have remembered. If she has been given a 'warning' that you intend facing her, she may well be prepared and try to excuse it. I wish you every success in this hard journey.