PTSD for Medical and First Responders

[A_Tech]

Hi,

Well obviously this my situation.

I was hoping to find others here that might have a similar background to chat with, it can be so hard to talk about this stuff with non-med people (and I mean no disrespect, it's just often graffic or upsetting to others).

Im a 40 year old female that has spent the last 10years in the State Trauma Hospital as an Anaesthetic Technician. My PTSD was brought about after years of exposure to shocking traumas, deaths, and no support from management.

I would love to hear from anyone that has a similar story, or just wants to chat.

Cheers ✌️

[TrailRunner]

Hey Beetle, it’s nice to hear from you, thanks for taking the time to write.

It certainly is hard to talk to others about what we experience. Im an emergency nurse and they’re a tough group to talk about feelings too.

Then the non health care peeps in my life just can’t understand what the big deal is; they seem to think it’s pretty trivial and I hear ‘you need to stop torturing yourself and get over it’ one too many times.

we must remember that what we see is traumatic, it is hard to process and how we react/cope is normal. We do the best we can with the shitty situation we find ourselves in.

vut we don’t need to do it alone.

have you reached out to your GP or a Psychologist Beetle? Having a Health care team of our own surround us can really help.

Hope to hear from you again soon.

TR

[TrailRunner]

Hey everyone, I need to talk- and it’s long winded- grab a cup of tea ☕️

Soon I’ll be moving into a new position that puts me back in a semi clinical position- let’s highlight the irony here. I need a support person to return clinical. They make me the support person for a group of nurses of varying levels of knowledge and experience. say what?

psych wanted me to try clinical before I put it off for too long, and I get it.. but IRONY

anyway - pre events I’d rock the position! So I keep thinking, yeah I can do that.

I haven’t had barely any flashbacks at work lately (in a totally non clinical position)- minus one or two driving to work. So this has helped me keep up the pep talk most of the time ‘of course you can do it’

then this week I uncover a new trigger - the flipping uniform I was wearing. I was told I need to wear it again. Big thumbs down

It’s neatly folded in the bottom drawer. I bought a new uniform after the events. I’ve not worked in them since I needed to take time off work.i haven’t even given it a thought as I had never intended on wearing it again.

so here I am no longer positive I can do anything clinical ever again because I’m floored by a trigger. I’ve been in bed or on the couch all day.. my head is full of cloudy mush. No longer motivated to do anything. I want to sink in to this earth

How am I supposed to pull it all back together to start this new job?!

[PamelaR]

I'm an imposter on this post.

I've been reading through it and just want to say you medical and first responders are awesome. Just don't know what to say other than - There is a lot of support here. Let loose if you need to. Because, I can't even begin to imagine how traumatic it must be. I'm terrified at times when I'm on the road that an accident will occur - what would I do, how would I cope. But you guys do this day in day out, whether it's on the road, in hospital or anywhere else. I'm so proud of you all and thank you for being there!!! The closest trauma I've ever come to, is a person having a fatal heart attack in the work place. That triggered my PTSD, but my thoughts and emotions were for his 6 children and wife.

Hey TrailRunner go easy on yourself. You are AWESOME!! It's going to be the pits. But don't let it define you. If you really do not want to be there once you've gone back - that's easy LEAVE! (I can say that because I don't know your circumstances, e.g. spouse, mortgage, children etc.)

[Beetle]

HI

Hey Trail runner this sounds terrible. Isn't there a way that you can wear a different uniform? At our work we asked out boss and we are allowed to wear flowery scrubs etc. Would that be easier to avoid this trigger??

Yeah my support network is only my friends ( very good ones) at the moment. My parents don't even know as yet. Too hard basket to talk to them. SInce it hit the fan my regular GP was on holiday or booked out. No chance for Psych over the xmas time either. I don't even see a endocrinologist, or onc as yet as everything is still in the air. Hope to meet my main GP next week. So I'm a bit lost a the moment. Music, wine and tears it is, plus distracting myself at work ( medium success) and in the garden.

I'm checking the cytology results daily but its not back as yet. Need answers! Aaargh.

Beetle

[TrailRunner]

Hey Beetle,

They've let me wear smart casual for my new position. Up until that decision was made, I felt so helpless. The control of life I gained back were instantly taken away again. And they understood to some degree, that i'll never turn up to work if that uniform is part of the deal. (this will give me away if anyone i know is on here, but ah well... my psychs idea for a new uniform was a wonderwoman scrub shirt! how fun!)

I've also had more matrix re-imprinting sessions since, seen my psych and my GP all in the one week (just happened that way, they are totally not instantly available either just the same as your GP). And mine always seem to go on holiday every other month lol (feels that way anyway) And I get the irrational panics every time they tell me "what if I have a meltdown and your away, then what do i do?"

While waiting for your results /GP appt are you able to do a couple nice things for yourself, like taking a couple days off work to reduce your overall stress load a dash? and distract yourself in your garden, get away for a day or two to the beach/bush/favourite place...
Or take yourself for a walk of an evening or two / dinner at home with a friend (for this one i recommend pizza/pasta more carbs the better). sometimes better to cry with a friend over wine, rather than solo into the wine.. sometimes.

Hope your cytology results come back really soon x

TR

[Maggie1942]

I have found the practice of Transcendental Meditation of profound benefit for an old PTSD injury. Yes it is perhaps, beyond the reach of many people as it costs in excess of $1000 to do the course. However the David Lynch Foundation is interested in forming a group to benefit from this amazing technique. This foundation has made this technique available to thousands all over the world who would otherwise not be able to afford it. Attend the Robert Roth talk at the Arts Centre in March to hear how you might access this road out of pain.

[CoffeeSnob]

Hello, I'm new to the forums but really happy to be here. I'm a current serving police member, diagnosed with PTSD and depression in my 18th year. I now work work in a very different role, but within the same organisation. I like to think I'm on the road to recovery and have vowed to keep sharing rather than keeping everything in. I look forward to learning something from all of you and offering you my support too.

[Croix]

Dear CoffeeSnob~

Welcome, I'm very glad that it is not too late for you. To still be serving and having the wisdom and opportunity to change tracks is a great thing. There does come a time for a fair number when operational duties become too much, and it really is not worth one's life to simply try to keep on going.

I spent a couple of years early on in the area you are in now and while I did not stay there found there was an awful lot to it. I'm sure you would miss the day to day interaction you had but I'm trying to say your current role has its compensations - plus interest and development.

I was invalided out many years ago and unlike you still receive regular treatment which I've found has helped. The reason I mentioned it is that provided you (or the Force) can afford it keeping in touch with your therapist can yield dividends long term.

Please excuse me offering advice, hindsight is a wonderful thing and should be shared:)

As for coffee - white and two, instant is fine.

Croix

[CoffeeSnob]

Hello Croix,

Thanks for your message, it's really nice to hear from you. And thanks for sharing a bit about yourself and for the advice too. I'm all-for hearing about what has worked for other people, but seriously can't relate to the instant coffee thing.

It's great to hear you still have ongoing support - it's something I'm rethinking at the moment.

Hope to chat soon,

CoffeeSnob

[Recuperandi]

Hello, great forum and very much needed. I was medically retired from the police force in August after 29 years of service. I was diagnosed with PTSD, depression and anxiety in 2016. It has been a long road of treatment and recovery and I still have challenging times but I am hoping the worst is past. My long term partner is a Paramedic with 21 years experience. I wish all medical and first responders the very best of health, it is a tough job. Self care is so important, something I didn't do. Two and a half years of very intensive treatment, which is ongoing, I feel I am in a better place. Happy to contribute to any conversations about the mental health of medical and first responders. Cheers.