Help! Psychosis, accusations and hurtful comments from my boyfriend.

[Peggie]

I have been in a relationship of 9yrs with my boyfriend, we have 2 children.

The last year has been a total mess, resorting to the destruction of our entire relationship. With accusations of infidelity, physical/emotional/psychological  abuse, DVO, drug use and complrte mental health break downs.

When my partner uses, I can see within mins a change in him.

Firstly he goes quiet, shy boyish like, unsure how to do every day things, totally confused by everyone and unable to comprehend the simplest of things spoken in general conversations. Hours after his first use, he becomes aggressive, agitated, frustrated and usually begins, the 2 day torment, that involves accusations of being a sex worker, cheating with his friends and/or people in the home.

He constantly changes my words, names and says I talk backwards.

In the last 6 months it has got worse, he is in psychosis, still showing signs of psychosis most days of the week, which has meant he cannot live at home, and be around the children.

I am heart broken, I love this man, and completely believed we would be forever, but our relationship is torn to shreads. 

I don't know what to do, I'm exhausted, numb, sad, with little hope. 

[Sophie_M]

Hi Peggie,
Welcome to the forums and thank you for sharing this here. We’re really sorry to hear what you’re going through. We hope you can find some comfort and understanding on the forums, where other community members may be able to relate to what you’re going through.

In a healthy relationship, you should be communicated with and treated with respect, so it might be worth having a look at the 1800Respect pages. It could be useful to have a chat with them to discuss how you’ve been treated by your partner, including the abuse you mentioned. They're on 1800 737 732, or you can reach them on online chat. You could also speak to the Family Relationship Advice Line on 1800 050 321. They offer free advice to families going through issues. There’s also Parentline (who have a number for each state listed here) if you would like some help for you and your children https://kidshelpline.com.au/parents/issues/how-parentline-can-help-you Do either of you currently have any support with these issues, or someone you feel you can talk to about this? Remember, you can both always reach out to Beyond Blue or Counselling Online, who support people suffering from addiction, or supporting others through addiction and substance abuse. You can find the number for your state or territory here, https://www.counsellingonline.org.au/and they also have some helpful information pages, such as helping yourself while supporting others.  It’s so important that while caring for your partner you are aware of your own emotional wellbeing. Please remember to reach out any time you feel you are struggling, to the Beyond Blue helpline on 1300 22 4636. 

We think it’s really important that extra support and medical advice is there through this, so we think it’s really good to keep the GP informed of what’s going on. Please remember that if either of you feel unsafe at any point, the number to call is 000.

Thanks again for posting here. It must have taken a lot of strength to share this, but you never know who will read this post and feel less alone in their own experience.

Kind regards,
Sophie M