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UPDATED: I just feel alone and lost in a new world I don't like
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Hi Zetta,
Happy to hear you're making some progress with hubby. Even little things can make you feel more cared for and valued.
Hoping you can get your op soon. Take care and let us know how you go.
Cheers,
Carol
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Thanks Carol,
It is the little things that makes it worth it!!
I'm just getting a bit of cabin fever!! This rain is just continuing and i'm missing the sun. Just feeling down today. I did end up cleaning the house though!! My boys are all playing outside in the rain getting wet.
I hope I can have my op soon. It would make life a little easier for me.
Thanks for checking in on me.
kind thoughts
zetta
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Hello Zetta...
I just noticed you posted, so I thought I would pop in and say hello to you.
No I don't think I have the same problem as you do with close family members not being aware. Most times, how I am feeling is on my face. I don't know...., some people aren't as observant as other people. Or they don't know much about depression to begin with, so they may not know what it looks like or something. Then some people who have depression put on masks or a happy face to cover up how they really feel and such. These are just my thoughts Zeta, I am no expert.
I am not sure where you live, but here there is definitely no rain, only humidity and hotness.
Anyway I hope you are feeling at least a little better. I think the lost feeling is a common one as well. I have certainly felt it, but I can't explain it. I wish I could.....
I have noticed you posting on the thankful thread, that is a good choice you made. Way good.....
Hugs to you if you would like one.
Shell xx
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Hi Zetta,
Sorry to read that you are going through a rough patch. Feelings of isolation within a relationship are indeed distressful. So well done for reaching out. That's what these forums are for.
Quite a few men prefer to process issues on their own before they can discuss them with anyone else. However, denying you a cuddle -as never noticing your depression- shows some degree of insensitivity to your needs. You did the right, courageous thing by coming clean. Living a lie is never a viable option within a close relationship. There is nothing more you can do. You have bravely done your bit, regardless of consequences. As Paul so rightly pointed out, your husband's reaction is his problem, sad as it may be.
Many people don't know much about depression. It is often swept under the carpet. I hope that somewhere along the line, your husband will be offered the opportunity to learn about how it affects sufferers and what he could do to help ease the pain. When too close to the bone, this info is usually better accepted if it comes from a knowledgeable outsider (GP or therapist).
I hope you can soon put the endometriosis problem behind you. You don't need this extra pain and stress.
Home schooling is a challenge too. You're doing a great job of keeping it all together. Please remember to take good care of yourself. We are often our harshest critics. Superwoman may be attractive...she is also an unattainable fantasy.
When support and understanding are not available on the home front, we can't be there with you but will be here for you when needed.
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Hey dear Zetta!
I read your posts, and I think you are a very courages woman, so a big welcome to you to the forum!! (although you might have already been here for a while) Hats off to you for being so brave and posting here! I know it's not an easy step to take, you are a legend for doing that 😉
I'm sorry to hear that your husband isn't as supportive as you need him to be right now, I think maybe he cares about you a lot so he is feeling painful too for you, just my own interpretation of his reaction, please don't get offended if you don't like this 🙂 And I know what it feels like to be lost and confused, so you are not alone Zetta!! Hope you know here we all care about you and listen and understand with our full heart and ears, reply anytime you want Zetta 🙂 Take care!! You are a legend, keep being just the way you are, and go gentle on yourself too, just like Paul said 🙂 And thank you for sharing your story with us, it is a great help to anyone feeling confused and lost just like you 🙂
Have a great evening Zetta!!
With Love,
Grace xx
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Hey Zetta
Your hubby not 'understanding' is really one unnecessary hurdle in your life. Starwolf was spot here....A GP really has wake up him.
Just my humble opinion Zetta, ask hubby to come to a GP/your therapist with you and I think he will find out rather quickly about your depression. Sometimes people 'need to be told'
Depression is an illness not only with the psychological symptoms but the changes in brain chemistry that are also present......Making it a physical illness in itself.
I hope you find some peace Zetta
Paul
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Hi Shell,
My dad, uncle and aunt on my dads side all suffer from depression. Dad told me a few years ago that I suffer from depression not long after he got diagnosed. So i have the support from my parents but unfortunately not my husband. He went to the last GP visit with me and the Dr told him that what ever grudges he has he needs to put to one side and look after me but he's still not getting it. I have another GP appointment this week and ill take him with again.
Yes I'm pretty good at putting a happy face on and go along with it. But my mum always knows when something is bothering me, its like she sees right through me even on the phone. Gosh I love my mum!!
Were in Mackay and its flooding in some spots. We've had over 500mm of rain since Thursday!WE had bits of sunshine yesterday which made me feel a little better.
Thanks for your hug Shell! Much Appreciated!!
Hugs right back at you!!
Zetta
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Hi Starwolf,
Thanks for your reply, Yes i do realise that he processes things different than me. And i know that both you and Paul is right. Which adds to me feeling even more guilty and depressed because it feels like I'm the one who caused all of this by telling him my secret. I'm going to ask my husband to attend a few sessions with the psychologist when I start seeing one and I think we need to go to couples counselling too so that we can tackle this huge void in our communication and about what I have done. I will have my first Laparoscopy to diagnose the endometriosis on 13 May. I'm stressing about that as the recovery can be up to six weeks and I will be on bed rest for 2 weeks. Thanks for your encouraging words!! It's hard some day but I get through it.
Kind Thoughts
Zetta