Struggling to go on

[Tess2]

Life is being really hard for me and troubles keep compounding. I cannot face wading through what is needed to move forward I feel isolated and alone. I have people who care but I think they can be overloaded with my despair and it can be a burden. There seem to be obstacles all along the way.

Two years ago I lost my job. A career of 50 years. I am 66 and have no partner. I have not coped well with this loss and now have significant financial problems too. I have to sell my home. Pay off my mortgage and buy a new place. I live with my son who is very caring but I have suppported him financially and emotionally through the family court. His ex is trying to remove him from his daughters life. I feel I have reached my retirement years with very little and no joy. Depression has been a big part of my life. But I have managed. Now I also have severe anxiety. It paralyses me. And panic attacks. I don’t know how to do each day.

[Ggrand]

I'm glad things worked out for you this afternoon. I don't watch much tv but when I do, it's usually game shows, or anything fantasy. Lord of the rings, hobbits, dinotopia, anything Disney, family movies...Violence, yelling swearing, shouting, especially any one showing anger usually triggers me...so I'm extremely careful what I watch...

I hope you all sleep well tonigh, Nite bites Tess, stormcloudz and anyone reading..🤗🤗🤗 hugs if you like them...

Grandy...xx

[stormcloudz]

Well I used Grandy's approach to housework this morning, and it was very helpful. I had slept in, and didn't really have time to do the two things I had planned before an appointment. Normally I would be strict with myself and rush around trying to get them done, only to be late for the appointment, and then have a whole flow-on problem. This morning I thought "you know, that can wait til tonight", and off I went. So simple, but it's interesting to realize how much I whip myself along to get things done, even when it doesn't make much sense. Thanks Grandy! It's small changes that add up over time I find.

I thought of another category of TV that I like - period dramas. Like Grandy I avoid violence and period dramas are generally good. Tess, do you watch period dramas? Did you have another inspection to clean for today?

[Tess2]

Thank you for checking in on me.

yes, i do like period dramas in fact i am watching one now, but the period is not really so long ago. It is a wet day here and i am going to finish my ironing in a while. My dogs are at the groomer, and i am sitting on my bed with an hot water bottle for my feet. I am feeling anxious today, but managing it i think.

tess

[Ggrand]

Hello Stormcloudz, Tess,

Im pleased my strategies have helped you stormcloudz..I just do what I can to get by each day, sometimes each minute.....Period dramas, ? I'm sorry I am not sure what they are...lol I'm a little nieve at times...

Tess, How are you? Thank you for calling into my thread today. That was a pleasant surprise and very much appreciated.. I'm sorry sweetie,did I miss something Have you sore feet 😥..if so I hope they get better soon..Oh how I dislike ironing, I buy everything that doesn't require ironing, I really admire any one that irons...I hope you don't have to much to do...

Please Take care of yourselves and I hope tomorrow is a better day then today..

Kind thoughts and caring hugs 🤗.

Grandy....

[Tess2]

Hi, no,no sore feet, i prefer an hot water bottle for warming when i am cold. Perth is having its first wet coldish blast of weather. I dont particularly like ironing but feel pleased when i have done it all. I like the freshness of it. I even iron sheets etc.

You have and are being such a support to me and so encouraging, i just like to give a bit back if i can

tess

[stormcloudz]

I also like a hot water bottle, and a lot of people have mentioned they find it's good for anxiety too.

Grandy, period dramas are basically anything set in the past, with all the costumes etc. Like Elizabeth I (not that one for you, it's a bit violent), or movies of Jane Austen novels (you might like those). Do you watch any of that sort of thing?

[Ggrand]

Hello, Stormcloudz, Tess,

I like the old black n white pictures, I know what you talking about and yes I do like watching them...

Thank you for the tip with the hot water bottle I will give that a go...But I got to buy a hot water bottle first...

Can I ask you Stormcloudz the reason behind your avatar name.?...I'm just curious you don't have to answer if you don't feel to....

Tess I hope your doing okay, I hope you have a good sleep tonight girls and readers. 🤗..

kind thoughts,

Grandy..

[Tess2]

Thank you for the responses. My anxiety is at an all time high today, it has just come on and is not settling and i have tried calming techniques. I cant mobilise myself at all i feel i have gone back several steps.

I accepted an offer on my house on the week end which is good. There are a few things to get through before it is final and i thought that this would settle me. But my anxiety has gone through the roof. I find it hard to do the things i need to. And am having terrible panic attacks and feel really low. I need to get on and start my own search for a home more intensley. There is so much. But i just cant do it.

[Ggrand]

Dear Tess,

I was exactly where you are now 2 years ago...Breathe..counting in for 1-2-3-4-5, then out for 1-2-3-4-5.. Keep at it keep deep breathing on exhale say relax, just keep at it...You are going to be okay, Tess How about a nice shower or bath, You will do okay. Try to distract yourself with your grounding box...that's what you have them for...

I hope the sale goes through for you, try now to make looking for your home exciting, try thinking of it as a new start for you..

Please relax...take your time...breathe...sing a song..play with your fur buddies..Please be okay Tess.

Kind thoughts, and hugs..

Grandy,

[stormcloudz]

Hi Tess

It's not surprising at all that your anxiety has peaked when you accept an offer on the house - it's good news, but it's also a big change and now the anxiety about the next steps is kicking in. Give yourself a little time to adjust, don't be hard on yourself that your anxiety has peaked right now. Lots of us cycle through bad days and better days, and your better days will come back.

Give yourself a little time to adjust to this change, be gentle.

If you want to talk through your criteria for a new house here, go for it. It doesn't mean you are committed to anything : )

PS Grandy - I like storm clouds, they can be a bit scary but offer the promise of new life and rain