Should I just suck this up?

[monkey_magic]

OK, this isn't easy for me to write bcas I respect police also but this is my situation.

I aparantly unlawfully entered a friends property, that's right a friends property. He wasn't home and I wasn't believed. Anyhow I was put in a mental institution. I preferred the hospital choice over the police station choice thinking I'll be in there for a couple weeks.

3 months later I came out overmedicated feeling like shite...misdiagnosed with a mental illness as a " safety net" seriously!!!!

3 months of my life where I couldn't work, and live my normal life. Inclosed in a small space, going crazy.

Should I just " suck this up". ?

[Croix]

Dear MM (with a wave to all)~

You have been sounding pretty good, legs and knees notwithstanding. Incidentally before I got rid of the bath I used an adjustable seat in it, made getting in and out so much easier.

I'm glad you followed your instincts and cancelled things, even if only just in time. there are many predators of all sorts, and being careful and going with your feelings is something I doubt you will ever regret.

I'm envious for you weight loss, my diet simply maintains the status quo (as I move around less my weight would otherwise climb).

There is a lot of talk on age difference, and frankly, provided everything else is OK, the only danger I know about is if the difference is so great you cannot share. I find talking to younger folks (in their 40s-50s etc) that I make references to jokes and TV shows and all sorts of things and have to explain, which never works. You need culture in common or you can drift.

I hope it works out for you

Croix

[monkey_magic]

And I hope things work out for you too Croix.

Surprisingly I've been losing more weight couch bound by reducing and changing what I put into my body.

To continue losing weight ( I'm going to be on this journey a while) after reaching a plateau you need to change things up. Then the body should respond.

Have you thought of finding out how many calories you need to consume for your age/height/weight to be in a calorie deficit to lose each week? It's possible! No man who goes without food stays the same weight. It's small sacrifices we make that empower us and make us better! There's a huge rage about intermittent fasting. You could even look into that information. Just find what works for you and if it doesn't do something else.

Nothing changes if nothing changes.

Cheering you on Croix.

I'm an independent woman who gets off on not needing a man and I love the freedom that creates. But if my work friend and I did get together one day or if I found someone else down the track I wouldn't be opposed. I've lived in both worlds.

Still learning lots about this life. Reading has become my best friend.

Happy mother's day to all the mum's for tomorrow! 💕

[ecomama]

Hey Monkey

WOW your weight loss has been amazing!
I'm so happy for you!

You know what you can do, you've SO got this lol.

Thankyou, I'll take those Mother's Day well wishes, hugs.

How are your legs and feet feeling?

Happy to hear your reports about your holiday.
Regardless of the rain, it sounds like you had an awesome time away.

I'm doing well even with a ridiculous amount of left field things being thrown at me last week, omg such stupid stuff lol.

And do you know what I thought about it all?
I thought, unless there's something I'm going to be thinking about at the end of my life, I'm just cruising past all this.

Life DOES involve handling the tough stuff.

But I know for 100% sure, that you and I have a specific "base line" so anything above this, we got.

Omg I wanted to tell you about a really WOW YouTuber... not sure if you've heard of her yet.
She does make up that is amazing.
I love her True Crime stories she tells while doing her make up lol but she also has Saturday Make up episodes too.
Her name is Bailey Sarian.

Just the way she puts on ALL sorts of make up is fascinating to me!
It motivated me big time to try out more things with make up, to buy brushes of all sorts lol, and generally to look after my skin a lot more.

Maybe this is something fun to watch if you're laid up?

Nice to see your positivity coming through.
Love EM

[golden82]

hi MM,

How are you? I didn't know you had this thread (or maybe I did and forgot??) there are so many threads and threads of threads lol it can make my head hurt. But great that you do - I just read this last page is all. And wow we are similar my friend.. I am 38 yo gal too 🙂 And I read your post dated 10 Feb - on the narcs and family and the subtle abuse etc. As hard as it is to learn this stuff and have it in your face, I think when you can see it, it can be the start of your future 🙂 It is so hard - I have been told I have cognitive dissonance, which you may too I don't know, but it is when you on the one hand want to see your Mum or Dad as a good, loving, caring parent - but the reality is not that and it is very hard to accept. So we can sit in a state of confusion. That is me unfortunately. But with learning and the right supports etc it helps. I hope you have some supports 🙂 you are a real go-getter, just from all you do, good for you MM, I can only daydream about that kind of go-getter approach to life. I tend to watch life from the sidelines. I like your approach much better. Take care 🙂

[monkey_magic]

Hi Em and Golden,all,

Em that shows how strong, wise and intelligent you've become not sweating the small stuff because in the scope of life how does it really matter? You have a depth of enrichment and understanding of important things and the rest,well,let's leave it to the small minded, ey.

I have been off my legs for about two weeks and I can still feel some pain in my knee but it's improved.

I read that psych meds can remain stored in your fat cells. I'm not sure how true or not that is but it will be interesting to see how I feel when I lose a massive amount of fat. That's the plan. I'm carrying way too much of it and it's a health risk. I looked up that you- tuber. I like her content. As for taking that long to do my make- up though hmmm.....

I tend to just do a quick home job and I'm out the door. I've seen other make- up tutorials where they use so many products and spend so much time shading. I don't think I could be arsed lol.But if it's something you have the patience for awesome.

Hi golden, you're welcome here anytime and I'm glad you found me! I tried to write to you on Shell's thread but my pH stuffed up again. My intention was to reach you where U are at with my words and just give you some cyber love.

Yes, parents, relationships can be complicated. I'm very lucky recently that my mum's improved. She's been doing a weight loss challenge with me and it seems to have improved her mood. Maybe hormones were affecting her? I think we are both calmer people since improving our diets. Having something to strive for seems to have improved her state of being. And I don't think she's as depressed about my obesity and eating habits because I've made a change. I feel I've gained some respect. She hasn't told me off in some time.

I too watch life from the side- lines. Hun, when you're sick that's ok because you are garnering strength from the outside world. Your journey is a difficult one and it takes a lot everyday. Could you go back into treatment? I say that hesitantly bcas I don't know how good it is but I feel you need to do something different to create change. I really want to see you healthy and happy and enjoying life and not a prisoner of your mind. You need to escape but have to find the key. I think going somewhere specialised might be on the cards again? I'll let you come to that conclusion. Your just so brave Golden and I want you to thrive.

I'm running out of words so I'll chat later,

💕

[golden82]

Hi MM,

Thank you x

I hope you have had a good week. I read over on the eating thread u were planning a walk today. How did you go? I was hoping to get out - even at night out the door - but the agoraphobia is too strong. I will have to do it tomorrow. I know I just have to do it day after day, or this fear gets worse. It has already got worse - crept up really; not dissimilar to how my eating disorder crept up around a decade ago. These things we do to 'protect' ourselves actually take over.. well for me at least. Yeah, the eating is 'fine' at the moment - I am eating all the time it seems. So don't need hospital thank goodness - hope I never do again - can't stand hospital. Your eating sounds like it is going well - you know so much and keep on learning with an open mind - you are amazing MM. I hope you enjoy your weekend. Thanks for always being so supportive of me and everyone x

[Guest_1643]

hey all

welcome back MM , sorry about the phone issues but glad to read u've had a lot of adventure and fun while off here! ur always fun to read.
I hope u are doing good

Sounds like u've taken life by the hands and been maximising every day

so inspiring and awesome.

Hi golden, EM and all others i may have missed.

[monkey_magic]

Hi everyone,

Golden- I'd chip away at the fear slowly and I know you have that urge. I believe in you girl. You have chipped away at many things before slowly. A long time ago someone said to me fear is the theft of dreams and I tend to live by that when I can. Setbacks are expected and ok and human. That's awesome news that you are doing well and aren't expecting to go back to hospital. I'm happy about your progress.

I'm, as you know on the opposite spectrum. I was over- feeding myself unknowingly because I was used to it and kept gaining and gaining a lot. I didn't take into account the medication, my inactivity because of sedation, my higher BMI, my lower energy expenditure. I would always crave food and give in and give in to my cravings. But I'm turning it all around slowly. Doctors and family and others were saying I needed to lose weight but I dismissed it or tried to but not seriously. This time is very different though. And I'm so glad I didn't take the doctor's advice and get surgery where they cut out 85% of your stomach, or put a sleeve in or whatever. Heard too many negative things about it that they're not transparent about before you get the surgery.

Hi Sleepy,

Cheers for your awesome supportive post. I can't maximize everyday like I used to but I feel I'm maximizing it with my condition as much as I can. Of course I fall and stumble and wobble through life as well...I think we all do. But changing my diet has definitely improved my energy levels and I'm walking around 15kgs lighter and it feels different. There's been a shift and I can't say I'm not loving it!

Hope you're doing ok 🌺

[awrinkle_in_time]

Hello
miss monkey 🙂

I can’t express enough how grateful i am to you for being there when I needed support, a friend and a caring word ..

so thank you with all my heart ...

wishing you the very best in everything you want to achieve

go for Gold you beautiful lady

you can do anything xxxx

[monkey_magic]

Hey awrinkle in time.. ! 😲

You are such a sweetheart to come here after all this time and warm my heart like that!

I really hope you are living your best life, or trying to and that you make your dreams a reality. I really enjoyed our conversations, it was no sweat. The memories of those convos are coming back to me. 🤯😁

I'm doing a lot better.

Kick ass my man.

And feel free to share news every now and then if u choose.

💕