Just want to Shout out

[Guest_1055]

I am just so tired, and I don't think I can try anymore. All I want to do is curl up tight and cry and cry. I am sick of this, and I even feel cross, as I said that. I can't do this, I just can't. And I don't think I want to anymore. I am not asking for any advice really and I am aware of the phone numbers and such., etc. But I just want to shout and shout out loud and say that I am plain sick of this. I am tired of struggling to get to where ever it is that I am going. I don't think I am making any sense either. So since I am unable to shout out in real life at the moment. I hope it is okay with whoever who reads this that I am virtually going to shout out now. I also feel like punching out, because it is just too much. It's too much.

I HATE THIS, JUST HATE IT. I AM TIRED OF FAILING AND FAILING. I JUST WANT TO GO.

[Guest_1055]

Hi Velv, yeah I did manage to walk on Thursday and I did a 2 hour grocery shopping yesterday. So it was a big store to walk in .And I went to the gym. Thanks for your encouragement. Hope you are okay there?

Hugs

Shell.xx

[blondguy]

Hi Shelleybelly

Maybe its a coincidence Shell and I dont know about anyone else but I just post when I am up to it. I dont really know what the other CC's are doing which you know anyway

I have actually been very tired and recently noticed that you havent been feeling too flash.....Just saying hello Shell x

Mr Woof

[Guest_3712]

Hi Shell, and Mrs D

Re hair dye- I used to make an horrific mess when dying my hair. In fact my hubby said the shower used to look like a scene out of psycho when I was done- hair dye was red too.

I finally realized the exuberance I uses when massaging it in before rinsing was way to aggressive and splashed it everywhere- even the rinsing bit needs to be calmer so it doesnt splash

It helps if you have a hand held shower head so you can direct to the tiles etc as you go so it doesn't stain.

I'm not a champion but I post here because you're a champion - kind, so thoughtful and compassionate.

BTW - get a haircut, and a colour I do it all the time and it feels amazing ! Good hairdresser is important- go with recommendations of others if you don't have one or someone who has been in business a long time people don't go back unless theyre good

Stressless

[Doolhof]

Hi Everyone,

Stressless, you have hit the nail on the head regarding the hair colouring, that sounds just like me. So much hair to get all of that colour into! Ha. Ha.

Shell, we Champs keep an eye out for people who may be needing a little bit of a boost or acknowledgement. Also like Paul mentioned, we are just like any other user on the forum and pop up where we feel comfortable to post.

Some threads I find a lot easier to connect to than others, I do try to reach out to people who are really struggling and hurting as well. In a way we do become part of an amazing community here, caring is a huge part of this.

Quercus I really appreciated your sharing of the neural pathways. Makes sense the way you wrote it!

Cheers to you all From Mrs. Dools

[Guest_1055]

Ah Good Morning Nat,

Yes that is the idea that I was thinking upon regarding changing our thought patterns and then the new feelings will follow. A bit like renewing our minds. Or take every thought captive for a bit, deciding if the thought is a truth or a lie sort of thing.

Gosh it sounds like the therapy group you go to is a bit like my one. I did have a quick thought there that perhaps you are in the same group. But then I thought no... I am pretty sure you live in WA

Regarding the scrambled mind..... I did think you may have been a bit scrambled in a few posts as the way you express yourself is a tad different. The scrambled feeling, it is sort of a feeling isn't it? Confusing myself now......Mmm it happens to me when I am either overwhelmed with many emotions flooding through my body, overthinking things, thinking upon many things at once ( no order at all) and when I am tired or stressed.

As to the walking thread... I find myself motivated to actually exercise after I read that others have. So you helped me yesterday as I was putting it off and putting it off. So a big Thankyou to you. I did go to the gym and I was glad that I did. We have discussed reasons on there before on the benefits of walking/exercise. I also find it can be a bit of an adventure as well, as one can sort of live through someone elses. Some of what people write sounds like that to me, so that is sort of fun and inspiring as well. I also find that I like expressing myself in writing, like describing some walks that I go on. After I finished writing those types of posts, well then I realise I actually enjoyed writing it.

Another reason is for accountability. Sometimes I feel I need to report that I actually did exercise. That might sound weird. I do not know??

Hope I got to the point here in what I have been trying to say Nat, my brain is again getting mixed up some.. oh well. Nice chatting with you.

Shell xx

[Guest_1055]

Hey Mr Woof, no sorry needed, if you don't mind me saying so....

You are welcome in regards to me helping you when you first came onto BB. It is encouraging to know that I actually did. So Thankyou for that.

And you sound like perhaps you are struggling some yourself there at the moment.? If you are then, I do hope that today is a better one for you.

Thanks too for telling me why you posted in here. And for the hug.

Shelleybelly x

[Quercus]

Hi Shelley,

Good for you for hitting the gym. Motivation while depressed can be like trying to move through a swamp I find.

This was spot on...

I did think you may have been a bit scrambled in a few posts as the way you express yourself is a tad different.

it happens to me when I am either overwhelmed with many emotions flooding through my body, overthinking things, thinking upon many things at once ( no order at all) and when I am tired or stressed.

Got it in one Shelley. Offline (yes in WA) there has been a lot of things going on and I'm struggling to get through my swamp so yes I sound different. Lately it has been small steps one day at a time. I'm finding there are a lot of triggers on the forums. Enough about me though. I will be fine have got a solid support network offline and am doing what I need to do.

Oh to the increase in comments (overthinking it Shelley) your thread keeps hitting the top of the new posts section. So more views. And the content is both positive and in need of support. You are a gentle and welcoming person Shelley it's easy to reply here.

I hope you have a good day today. Breathe in those pink roses.

❤ Nat

[White_Rose]

Hello Shelley

To answer your question about CCs, we do know when someone is feeling down, especially people like you who have been around a while. It's easier to pick up on sadness when you get to know someone. You have been so good for this forum and we would like to keep you here feeling comfortable and happy. It's sort of like a group hug and you and me are always up for a hug.

Talking about changing your thought patterns and actions is not easy to do, we need to practice. What Nat is talking about is Neuroplasticity. As Nat says it is about making new pathways in the brain. It was once believed that when you reached a certain you had no more capacity to learn something new. Perhaps learning to play the piano as I have been doing would be considered silly as I was too old. But we can change our ways of thinking which changes our actions. Thoughts do come first even when the action is so swift it seems both happen together. Definitely not easy, but the rewards are fantastic.

Think of it as walking along a grassy road. There is a path made by you in the past as you have walked along it everyday. Then you decide to make another path but it's not that simple. The old path is obvious and seems easier to walk along and your normal reaction is to follow the path already in use. Remembering to follow the new path, especially when it has not become as well-trodden as the old path, takes a conscious effort to remind yourself. Eventually the old path will be become overgrown and the new path will be your default or preferred path.

You wrote, Mmm it happens to me when I am either overwhelmed with many emotions flooding through my body, overthinking things, thinking upon many things at once ( no order at all) and when I am tired or stressed. Learning to tread the new path is an analogy for gaining control of these emotions. Perhaps you can put seats beside the new path for those times when you get tired or stressed. If you can cut through the clutter that is overwhelming you and remind yourself you are walking a new path it may help.

I'm not sure how helpful I have been with these comments. I comment because I have been making a new path for a long time but I still turn down the old default path on occasions and get cross with myself for doing so.

Mary

[Guest_1055]

Good illustration there with the grassy path there Mary. I could see an image of it. Yes I guess it is like you are deciding to go against the natural, something that has been perhaps ingrained in you for a long time even. I desire to renew my mind ... I think in essence that is what is happening, little by little.

Thanks for your comments about the CC's. And good on you for learning the piano. That's great...

I want to assure you that I am okay Mary, true I was not in a good place but I have learnt some lessons in all this. This may sound weird, as I think I am thankful for being in such a difficult and sad place otherwise I may not have learnt some things.

Anyway Thankyou Mary... and yeah truly awesome how you are learning the piano.

Shell xx

[Guest_1055]

Hi dear Stressless,

I have read your reply in here and could not discern if it was for me or Mrs D or both of us. But yeah I will be getting my hair cut. Not to sure about getting a colour though. My body does not cope well with a lot of chemicals . I guess I could try one from the large organic store not far from me. I know they do stock some organic dyes.

I cannot remember if you like hugs, but I shall leave one here for you to pick up.

Shell xx