Just want to Shout out

[Guest_1055]

I am just so tired, and I don't think I can try anymore. All I want to do is curl up tight and cry and cry. I am sick of this, and I even feel cross, as I said that. I can't do this, I just can't. And I don't think I want to anymore. I am not asking for any advice really and I am aware of the phone numbers and such., etc. But I just want to shout and shout out loud and say that I am plain sick of this. I am tired of struggling to get to where ever it is that I am going. I don't think I am making any sense either. So since I am unable to shout out in real life at the moment. I hope it is okay with whoever who reads this that I am virtually going to shout out now. I also feel like punching out, because it is just too much. It's too much.

I HATE THIS, JUST HATE IT. I AM TIRED OF FAILING AND FAILING. I JUST WANT TO GO.

[Doolhof]

Hi Chae,

Sounds like you are really cheesed off with your boyfriend right now. He may be a liar and he may certainly believe that he has rights that aren't the same for you.

My husband to me is a hypocrite in many ways, he thinks and acts very similarly. I just don't think he understands my point of view when these things happen.

I'd like to suggest you find ways to deal with this effectively and positively. Tit for Tat does not work in my opinion. It just made me feel bitter and twisted, hurt and angry. My husband went along in his own little world not knowing that I was hurting.

We all see life differently. Males and females have different perspectives on what is right or wrong. We all do, no two females think the same either.

I'd like to suggest you try to talk this out and not become a mass of hurt and pain.

Been there, done that, it isn't so pleasant.

Cheers to you from Mrs. D.

[velvetfaerie]

I'll try. Seems too hard to me.

x.

[Guest_1055]

Oh Chae, I am ever so sorry. You have a right to feel angry. I am hearing you. And it is quite understandable too. You are wanting to be treated with love and kindness by your boyfriend. And it did not happen or something.

I am no expert on communication like the spoken with verbal words. But I do know that it is best to deal with the frustration and anger we feel before attempting to have discussions with that particular person. Otherwise us emotional ones tend to express out of this forceful emotion. And what we say is somehow tainted by the anger. I know it is hard at the moment we are feeling it though.

Is this the same boyfriend you had before??

Anyway if you are still feeling angry please feel free to punch and punch out on this thread.

And if you are feeling hurt I can give you a hug if you will accept it.

Shell xx

[velvetfaerie]

I love him but I don't like the situation or him ATM so I dumped him. His situation isn't able to change ATM and I understand that. I'm sick of feeling unimportant. He has been trying harder but something in me is missing.

very sad

[Guest_1055]

Hi Mrs D and Chae,

Thanks for thinking of me Mrs D. I like what you do with the disappearing Motivation. Just sit with the lack of it for a while and ponder, what you should do. And I did feel motivated somewhat today. So yeah it didn't disappear. Anyway I really liked how you described it all for some reason. ie like the " mysterious missing Motivation" it is sort of how I interpreted parts of your post. ( I am getting all muddled now, so I do hope that makes sense?) Always like hugs....

Chae, I am so sorry you are sad. I long to give you some comfort of some kind.

You so much helped me last night as I was sitting in the car. It was these four words you said to me... " don't be sad Shell", that caused thankfull tears to roll down my cheeks. Thankful for you cared enough about me to say it.

So I would like to say these words to you. "Don't be sad Chae, please don't be sad".

[velvetfaerie]

Shell, I can't find my post! Maybe it's not in this thread? Anyway, you made me smile through my tears. I've been a wandering aimless gypsy today. Restless. Sad. But I know it had to be done.

Im glad I helped you, that's what friends are for 😄

C.

[Guest_1055]

You were pretty brave then Chae. The post might be in the walking thread.

Are you able to just have some you time? I am unsure of what you like to do besides exercise. But if you have a bath, maybe you could soak in it with some candles gently lighting the room. Paint your nails, watch a movie ( don't recommend a romance one though), bake some healthy yummy treat etc. What else to you normally find enjoyment in? You never know, it may help. Ooh don't you have a large hallway? Maybe you could dance up it or something.

I am now going to light this beautiful candle that I have here. It is so calming and peaceful just watching the flame.

I cannot remember if you like hugs, but here is one for you just incase.

You are brave.....

Shell xx

[velvetfaerie]

I had a shower, pjs and lit the fire. Oh ate chocolate too!

I loved painting my natural perfect nails ... sadly I've been biting them for weeks....

Me time is indeed the thing atm... I'm always putting others first. I'm too exhausted now. Sadly the ex bf has lost his last good friend ... I'm sad for him but not my problem. Maybe he will wake up to what he had..... maybe not lol.

More chocolate needed....

C.

[Guest_1055]

Ooh a nice warm fire... love the sound of that. Where I live there is two boarded up fireplaces. I would love to smash the boards out, but no not allowed. I will try and be content with the tiny flame on the candle, not much warmth haha.

And oh Chocolate, chocolate....

Maybe being exhausted will help you sleep well or something??

I will be off to bed soon, so good night Chae. Or is it Velvet??

Shell xx

[Guest_1055]

Okay Mrs D, I am now laying here on the bed, with tears. I am dressed in pyjamas still. It is already about midday. Half of me wants to just stay in here and hide from the troubles and whatever else. But another part of me doesn't want to . I don't want to waste any more of this day. For it will never come again will it?? So your motivation strategy is what I am going to do. As your words popped into my mind just a while ago. I will go and make a healthy hot chocolate and ponder right now. More tears now, most grateful for you...

Shellxx