I NEED SOME ADVICE/HELP

Nellym · ‎15-09-2017

ok, so I don't even know the best place to put this but here goes.

So I was talking to an online chat the other night about some of my issues and getting some advice. They asked if I had self harmed and I had said yes. I told them I was not suicidal and only used self-harm as a coping strategy when my other strategies don't work. Was asked if anyone was with me, I said my husband but he doesn't know about everything (he knows a little bit) and I am not ready to tell him. Said I was seeing a psychologist and that they know everything going on. They kept saying I need to tell someone and go somewhere for help. I kept telling them I was ok and didn't need medical assistance. They asked if they could ring me and I said not right now, I am happy to ring later on tonight when I am alone. So chat ended there.

20 mins later I have police knocking on my door saying they had a report of someone harming themselves and wanting to commit suicide. Well all hell broke lose. I spoke to them, they realised I was ok and did not need to go to hospital.

So now is the part I need help with. My psych is on 2 weeks leave so cannot get into contact. I have had to tell my husband more than I am comfortable with at this stage. I had already planned to sit down with him and my psych. together and let him know more.

Now everything is worse than ever. My anxiety is through the roof, has just increased my SH, panic attacks have doubled, my husband has gone all weird on me and now I never want to reach out and get help again in case something like this happens again. I feel so alone and don't know what to do anymore. The last 2 days have been hell and I feel like the little control I had has now gone.

demonblaster · ‎24-10-2017

Hey Nelly , have just read the whole thread, thx telling me yeah I wanted to know more about you.

I care too darl, don't want you to be in such a horrid place.

You've made some really good progress, ditching the GP, hubby going with you, pushing through not wanting too when so low but going anyway, talking here, ringing. This is all strong survival that you may not think but you're using strength. Good on you. Keep it rolling. Baby steps is right.

Very sorry to hear of the loss of your Aunty, very hard isn't it. Someone said to me when I lost my darling of 28 yrs to leukaemia the person may leave but the love never does. Wow, one of those amazing things that you hear with such clarity. Sound

So happy to read your hubby is dealing better than you thought he would. It would all be a shock to him, the fact he's supporting you is Gold. You're worth it girl

You probs don't think you are but you really are doing well under crap circumstances, you're getting help and you ARE strong, you WILL make it.

You have so much great support and care 🙂 xx

Nellym · ‎24-10-2017

Thanks DB,

Thanks for taking the time to read through my thread. Like everyone I have my ups and downs. Just more downs at the moment, but I will get there eventually. Thanks for all your words of encouragement, appreciate them a lot

Nell

demonblaster · ‎24-10-2017

More downs atm with good reason hun.

You're very welcome, I do care, don't wanna see anyone feeling so low. Empathy.

One good thing about time is it takes us into an unknown future. Hope 🙂 xx

White_Rose · ‎24-10-2017

Hello DB

Love your posts.

Mary

demonblaster · ‎25-10-2017

Hey Rose, thankyou 😄 lovely of you to say

You've been very supportive to Nelly here and I've seen you around the traps, ditto. Good on you xx

Nellym · ‎25-10-2017

Hi DB and Mary,

So have had some bad side effects to the meds I have been placed on unfortunately. Had lots of SI, nausea, headaches, dizziness, flashbacks, sleeplessness. So a whole range of things. Spoke to psychiatrist today and have to trust that he knows what he is doing as I have to try and ride it out. So very down at the moment but am hoping in time that they help me and bring me out of this depressive state that I find myself in.

Thanks again to you both for your support and encouragement. Just have to play the waiting game now.

demonblaster · ‎25-10-2017

Ughh sound harsh Nelly, as you say putting trust in psychiatrist. Let's hope. You're well and truly due for a break and some happiness hun.

Hope it doesn't take too much longer to adjust to them poor darl.

xx
yw btw 🙂

White_Rose · ‎26-10-2017

Hello Nell

Medication side effects can be horrible. I have lost count of the meds I have trialled. While you may side effects when you start taking meds they often go away after a few weeks. This is your body adjusting itself to a new way of operating. It is useful to stick with it for a few weeks. The good thing is the effects may go, or you can stop taking them and try something else.

Trusting your psychiatrist and being completely open with him are two hard to do things. Are you keeping a record of your symptoms? I ask because this can help the psych with his decision to change your meds or not. It's also good for you as you can look at what is happening and observe any changes. I believe six weeks is the usual time for ADs to fully kick in. Of course the effect is gradually starting to work so you should be noticing a small improvement which gradually builds up as you get accustomed to the new regime.

Flashbacks, nausea, sleeplessness and headaches are really the pits. May I suggest you treat each of these individually. Small frequent meals for the nausea, pain relief for the headaches. Sorry if I am saying something you already do.

Write when you can. I will be here.

Mary

Nellym · ‎26-10-2017

Hi Mary (DB)

Keeping record of everything for psychiatrist. Been trying to deal with symptoms, More symptoms have come up but can't talk about them yet. Over everything, just want it to end.

demonblaster · ‎26-10-2017

Yeah that's the bottom Nelly, take it out of the equation then there's only one way to go, UP.

It's in us. We've got strenghth, pull it up. Don't let depression make you give up. You're stronger than it is. Believe

YOU Can kick this, THERE'S BETTER