i need help please

[Jackson1994]

is there anybody there

i need some help i cant cope with this anymore please help

- jackson

[Jackson1994]

Like everyone, tired, over it, but also sick of being told “you have good things lockdown isn’t that hard when people overseas have it harder” well, when you live with anxiety, life is hard as it is, let alone living in this limbo and uncertainty.

Just really fed up and I think today was my worst day in covid, it’s just taking it’s toll and I have absolutely had enough

The messaging and the media stuff, seeing sick people, reminds me of my brother in hospital and it still hurts

[CMF]

Hi J,

Yes, I knew from your previous post that the media stuff was triggering you. I'm sorry to hear that, I can only imagine...

People tell us we're lucky compared to overseas but the fact it, it doesn't make it any easier. This is our reality and our feelings toward our reality are valid. It is sooooo draining, grounding day, working from home, same 4 walks day in day out.

I crashed a little this week as did a few colleagues I spoke with. Friday arvo I was so burnt out. I hear you, I understand. Turn off the TV, the negativity and fear. Focus on your beautiful family, watch your children grow and develop. Can you take a break from work? Even a day or so here and there? The monotony of working from home takes its toll. There's no break up of routine, no breaking up the day, no separation between work and home. For me its6like work invading my personal space.

I hear you. I understand. Keep sharing your feelings here. We've got you.

Cmf x

[Jackson1994]

Thanks cmf

I don’t like publicly sharing info about my work colleagues etc but this week when I was having a terrible terrible day, my team leader said “people have it hard at the minute, we have roof over our heads and families, look at afgahastan” and I nearly fell of my chair. All through this COVID, it’s been look after yourself, prioritise your well-being (not just my work everyone saying that)... now it’s “shut up be grateful”

There is no seperation between work and home, it feels like I’m either always at home or always at work.

it is just exhausting

W needs to see a specialist... can’t, covid.
I need treatment on my knee, can’t, covid.
You’re apparently perfectly fine as long as you don’t covid, everything else isn’t important

[CMF]

Yeah, I know the Afghanistan situation is horrid but this is your reality. You (we) cannot simply turn our feeling off because we are more fortunate than other parts of the world.

I wonder if those comments from your Team Leader are because he/she just does not know how to offer support anymore? They maybe just don't know what else to do.

It is exhausting. We are always at work or at home. Not much to look forward too,nothing to breK up the days.. I completely understand and hear to listen when you need..

Cmf x

[Jackson1994]

No end in sight not even a date for us to look forward at (even if it does get extended, it’s knowing we’re in lockdown at least until then)

Feel the worst I have in a long time tonight

H is in bed went to bed early so I’m just up by myself

[CMF]

Hey,

I'm trying to get through 1 day at a time now that I know it's extended. I find if I look ahead it feel like forever. As much as I don't like being home I'm anxious about going back to the office.

Do you have Zoom meetings? If so do you feel any better after 'reconnecting '?

What are the kiddies up to these days? Is W still enjoying being a big brother? How is Angelina? Growing quickly I'll bet.

[Jackson1994]

Zoom/MS teams meetings everyday, and our team meet a couple times a week.

It does feel good to connect with others in those meetings but just not the same anymore

Both kiddies are good keeping us busy that’s for sure.

W is a busy little thing, but we knew that was coming when we had to childproof everything at 7 months. He is into everything! And I mean everything.
Glad we have a yard.
Not sure how a 2 year old that wakes up every 2 hours needing to be resettled at night (yep!) can have that much energy, someone explain that to me, please. I’d love to have that amount of energy. Funny kid though, won’t play with any toys but will find something in the house like a box, a plastic cup and just walk or run around the house with it for hours.

Angie is going really well, thriving actually. So proud of her. Now that it isn’t too cold I have started our evening walks at the beach, like I did with W every night.

[CMF]

I keep a gratitude diary. Most nights before I go o bed, I write 3 things I'm grateful for. It may be the same 3 things sometimes but it helps me look beyond the despair. I might be grateful for sunshine, going for a walk, my kids, feeling calm, morning coffee, a favourite TV show. Anything that gave me even a moment of pleasure. It helps take mind off the feeling of no end in sight.

Cmf x

[Jackson1994]

That’s a good idea CMF

[Jackson1994]

We are exhausted, I’m just over this covid, want our lives back.

unrelated to covid but also not helping, this is classic parenting a baby and toddler at the same time...

W woke up every 2 hours last night - standard, trying to manage that.
But the baby didn’t wake up when he did, she woke up on the opposite schedule, we literally had crying all night...

🤪