how do i stop crying

[Matchy69]

I feel so alone,i dont have many friends or anyone who wants to know what i am going through.I just find my self just breaking down and crying.I just want some one to listen and not to judge me.

[Matchy69]

Hi Sarah I hope you are managing to keep your kids entertained during this time.Mine are at their mothers at the moment.I will probably get them tuesday next week.I have to take my daughters cat back to the vet to have stitches out.I dont have to get out of the car for that.They come and collect the cat from the car and bring it back.Certainly different times at the moment.

I put in my order for home delivery for Woolworths and take 5 days before it gets delivered which means i will be short of food until tuesday afternoon.I am just going to avoid shops as much as possible now and they are a nightmare to shop at now and the staff trying to enforce the social distancing rules.I had toilet paper in my cart and it dissapeared before i could pay for it and so did some other items.Their still seems to be a shortage up here of a lot of items.Maby because i am in regional Queensland.At least six more months of this and no idea when it will end.Will we be able to celebrate Christmas this year as we can't with Easter and not allowed to even go to church.I have tried to get hold of my brother but can't seem to contact him.I know his wife will be flat out being a nurse.They need all hands on deck.I am sure my brother is busy even though he isn't giving services on Sunday anymore.I think he would still be visiting nursing homes but i don't know i get no reply back from him.Makes me feel more alone then ever.I come on here just to find someone to talk to but struggle to find anyone to talk to anymore.I know it's me as i am not very likeable and they can't be all wrong going all the way back to when i was four years old in kindergarten.

I have been out in the garden and i got my daughter to help me plant up the vegie garden with our winter crop.I couldn't get what I exactly wanted but at least i got something in.Everyone went crazy buying up all the seedlings and seeds so people like me who have been growing a vegie garden all their life have to struggle having one now.Good luck to them and I hope they have a successfull vegie garden.I am glad I am allowed outside and don't have to be locked inside all the time.

I wish things could have been different but I make sure i destroy everything good in my life no wonder i spend most of the days crying.I feel like i am talking to my self and no one want's to know my struggles mentally.I try to put on a happy face when I am really crying inside.The realization that anything good in my life will allways dissappear.

Take care

Mark

[Aaronsis]

Hey Mark

It is such strange and very isolating and emotional times, I am so sorry that even when you feel so very sad on any given day that the current situation is really adding to that, I am just so happy to hear from you and that you are sharing and talking, sometimes though, while people don't always respond they do read, and while you do need the feedback and the interaction sometimes we are helping others by sharing our own pain and feelings and we need to feel good about that, that we are helping.

Yesterday while I was working from home my daughter was over, she was sooo bored she died my hair..it looks good but I am a very dark auburn now..a very firey redhead...lol...how are your kids going with the whole thing......that is so wonderful that your daughter helped you with your winter crop. I would LOVE to do the whole gardening thing as I have said to you before, and even more so with veggies and at a time like this. You are so clever and maybe I need to pull my finger out and make a garden bed, even a small one and grow some things...maybe I can do that this weekend..you have inspired me....

The whole shopping thing is a bit weird and hopefully your order comes soon. My local Coles is still quite lean on things and I really can't recall the last time I saw pasta on the shelf, or pasta sauce...I don't need it but just thinking of how much others are taking....hmmm...and also with the toilet paper, I really thought that had calmed down and surely by now people have horded so much that they are not shopping for it???? maybe I am wrong.

Hopefully your daughters cat is ok, that is really cool that the vet is putting these things in place so that they can still operate and safely, I guess animals need medical help still too so we can't go closing these places down.

Here always for you Mark and I know I am a bit slow to respond sometimes, just know you are a great friend and I do think of you often, and wonder what you are up to today, and while I am busy posting others I see you pop in and help too, that is so wonderful of you.

Chat soon and hope the weekend can bring you some more garden time.

Hugs

Sarah

[Matchy69]

Another depressing day and no one to talk to.

[Birdy77]

Hello Mark, Hello Sarah 😊

Mark, I'm sorry to hear you're gaving a depressing day with nobody to talk to.

Such weird times we are living through, remember you are not aline andxwe are all in this lonely, strange boat together.

So cool that you and your daughter got your winter crop into the garden. Well done. I have decided to just concentrate on garlics and greens (silverbeet, spinach, kale), shallots, plus herbs (esp coriander) this winter.

Hey Sarah, yes you should totes pull finger and make a little veg patch, asap!! You wont regret it lady! Just start small, grow some greens, or something that is expensive to buy at the shops, then you feel awesome going out and chopping some valuable greenery at dinner time!!

I just thought I'd pop in to this thread and say g'day and wish you both some love and care from me.

🌻birdy

[Aaronsis]

Hey Mark

Just thought I would stop in and say hi and see how you are doing on this Thursday?

Easter is going to be weird this year, I have just stocked up on some craft stuff and will hopefully do all of that with the kids to keep them busy and try to make it fun. It will be weird without the usual family catch ups but it is what it is.

I am really getting my head around this whole garden concept and I might do a little one like the ones you get at bunnings, those raised bed thingos..Birdy will be impressed too...lol

I have even been researching what to plant at this time of year and asparagus really appeals as I love it...I wonder if that is hard to grow...

How are your kids going and will you see them over the Easter weekend?

Huge hugs to you Mark and hope to chat soon

Your friend Sarah x

[Matchy69]

Hi Sarah it was good to hear from you.I will be dropping my kids off at their mothers saturday.I might do some psinting.I usually go for a motorbike ride easter sunday but wont be able to this year.

Thats good you are going to try to have a garden.I know with asparagus it takes 3 years to you can start harvesting spears.Fresh asparagus taste so much better then the can stuff.One of the things i grow is silverbeet and put it in everything like spaghetti bolanese and even feed the chooks it.I have watermelons ready to pick now and then when i have them all harvest i will have another bed to get ready to plant up.Not sure what yet.I am going to make another bed around my water tanks and put flowers in and maby some more roses.

Take care,

Your friend,

Mark.

[Matchy69]

I have just started on my new garden bed with the kids and removed a dead tree and worked out what i will need.I will put some blocks at the back of it so it will be level.I just looked up them online at binnings and found the ones i want but they dont give me any measurements so i cant work out how many i need.I put that on hold for the moment.

[Aaronsis]

Hey Mark

You sure have been busy out in the garden which is awesome, so time with the kids and getting them involved and outside, which is awesome and some fresh air and being outside, all really great things.

I have been kind of locked inside and need to get out and do some exercise, although I have been doing some paintings and actually did three yesterday which I am kind of proud of.

Easter this year is really different, I would have usually traveled to be with my dad but obviously that did not happen this year, but we are trying to do things that are Easter like and I am trying to get the kids to do paintings too and even put them up in the house window so people can see them.

It is raining here today so I think we will watch a movie or something like that tonight.

The cats are feeling a bit house bound too but I must say that they are really loving us being around all the time and for them to have lots of cuddles.

Have a wonderful day tomorrow and enjoy the day with the kids.

Happy Easter Mark

Your friend

Sarah xx

[Matchy69]

Today I painted the one of the lounge room walls.I just have one wall to go.I will do it later in the week.I keep thinking of my dear friend how she is going with this virus and if she is ok and her family in America.I have no way of knowing how she is and i am worried about her as she went to Spain recently.

[Aaronsis]

Hey Mark

That is really great that you have done some painting of the house walls, a really great time to do some of those sorts of jobs while we are inside being good and washing our hands..lol

I am sure it will look so great when it is finished and all fresh and will make your living area almost new and a new place to be, how great.

I am sorry you are worried about your friend, hopefully she is ok and that this virus has not impacted her. Are you able to email her or send her a message, while she may not respond at least she will know you are thinking of her and worried about her wellbeing, which is very kind of you Mark.

I painted a hummingbird today and it is sort of ok...lol..it took awhile but it is not what I thought it would look like but it is ok, I had a good time doing it and my daughter was at the table doing some things too so we were hanging out together which was nice.

Happy Easter Mark

Hugs

Sarah xx