FESTIVE SEASON STRUGGLES

[Doolhof]

Season's Greetings everyone.

We have a lovely cheery Christmas and New Years thread started up in the Social Zone. Hope you can drop by there and share some joy and happiness.

This is the alternate thread, where you can share the not so pleasant memories of Christmas or the concerns you may have for Christmas 2016.

For me, my depressive brain decides to hassle me about Christmas in November! That is so unnecessary! I need to break this habit!

So on this thread you can share the negative and hopefully find a positive at the end.

You might like to share what the worst present was that you ever received, or how sad and miserable you are at Christmas.

By sharing, we may well be able to help and support each other through a time that can be very tough for some.

This is the place to vent, the thread on the Social Zone is also waiting for you to add your happy thoughts and memories of Christmas and New Years.

Thinking of you all, hugs from Mrs. Dools

[Moonstruck]

Hey everybody - going into hospital day surgery today - have this done every year except had it 5 weeks ago in November and I looked so good in my Qld Health lavender gown they want to do it all over again...just for some added Christmas Cheer. (I wonder how good their decorations are this year?)

So fasting from now on..one more glass of water in an hour then nothing till it's all over later afternoon - yay! probably in unpleasant discomfort tonight - haven't told either of my sons...they'll wonder and worry why I;m having it again so soon after November...(I dunno exactly myself!!)

My elder son's best mate and work colleague...like a brother to him.....died suddenly from brain bleed - no warning. He is devastated, in bad distress and in shock so not giving him this also. The other son has his hands full juggling work, wife's work and kids school holiday baby-sitting. (I am going to help out there in couple of weeks....hope I am up to it!!)

The heatwave here is intolerable - making people ill. Wish I could afford air conditioning but many expenses one after the other at present.......pardon if a hint of cynicism has crept thru here.....SO glad when all this Christmas hype and absolute media Crap is over!!..................thanks all, for being there.....i do appreciate you all so much and know you are fighting your own battles and challenges - we're all champions! xx

[Starwolf]

Moon, you are such a thoughtful, caring Mum...I'm glad you are sharing with US all. I hope you can soon get the answers you are after.

Please take it slow afterwards, OK ? Being so brave doesn't mean you must keep going as if nothing had happened...

My thoughts will be with you today.

[Moonstruck]

thank you Star..............

[Kazzl]

Hiya Moonstruck - thinking of you too my friend. I bet you look downright fetching in your hospital gown. Hope all goes well hun and you bounce back asap.

Hey nowhereman - 12 string! Nice! I neeeed one! (though I should probably get a whole lot better on six first). Glad to hear you're feeling better. Do you do a lot of busking?

Cheers

Kaz

[QBEE]

Hi guys

In regards to the trials of the "festive season" I am a health care professional holding down a senior position dealing with often acutely unwell patients many of whom are presenting with mental health issues. I also have a long standing history of major clinical depression and anxiety, with an extensive familial history. I have recently experienced the loss of a nephew through suicide who was treated at my place of work. Not only do I suffer with my own issues during this time but am dealing with patients with a multitude of varying mental health issues also exacerbated by this stressful time of year.

I guess all I wanted to say is you're not alone. Whether you're a functioning member of society or not, mental health issues aren't discriminatory. I recently read something that rang true for me. Rather than wishing for you to "have a good day", I will say "have a day". Because most days that's all that we can manage. X

[Kazzl]

Hello QBEE, a very big welcome to you and thank you for joining us.

I'm sad to hear of the loss of your nephew, I can only imagine how traumatic that must have been for you, especially as he was treated at your workplace. It will be a sad Christmas for you and your family. If you're all together, please remember you are there as a family member not a professional - in other words, allow yourself to grieve too, don't try to look after everyone else at your own expense.

I think the stresses of working with mental health patients must be that much harder when you have experience yourself - while you can bring so much depth to the job through your lived experience, it must at times be very emotionally difficult because you truly understand the pain and struggle of people in your care. I am making a career move into mental health next year and I'm acutely aware that I'll need to take very good care of myself and use the support mechanisms I have in place.

Do you have good debriefing processes at work, and people in your private life that support you and know when you need some care yourself? I hope so, and of course you are very welcome to share your load here anytime. We're good listeners.

Very good to meet you QBEE.

Regards and respect

Kaz

[Owly_McOwlface]

Hello everyone, I'm new to this forum but not new to depression, have been in treatment for a few years. It's ups and downs, lately mostly down.

Having a particularly difficult time this Christmas because of money troubles and feel very alone. Haven't put the tree up. I had hoped to make presents for my family but I ran out of time so now I feel like a jerk. I feel like I'm the only person who realises how bad things are. I try to remind myself that I don't have a great perspective right now, but it's hard not to feel overwhelmed.

[Kazzl]

Hello Owly, welcome to the forum. I'm glad you joined us. It's a tough time of year isn't it.

You're not a jerk, you're someone who's struggling right now. And that's very understandable if you're having a depressive time and money worries.

Does your family know you're not well? Are you able to explain to them? You know, if you were struggling with a physical illness and couldn't manage presents people would understand. This is no different.

Your gift to your family is you. Always. And you are enough.

Do you see your doctor or a psychologist regularly? If you've been having treatment for a while it might be worth talking to your doc about whether it needs reviewing. I don't know if you're on medication, but sometimes with depression we need to get our drugs reviewed because they can lose efficacy over time and a new one might be needed. I've had to do that a couple of times over the years.

How do you plan to spend Christmas Day Owly? We'll be here if you want some company.

Very best to you, and I hope you keep posting. You sre amongst friends here.

BTW, I love your name!

Kaz

[Starwolf]

Hi QBEE and Owly, good to meet you. It is always a pleasure to welcome new members on board.

QBEE, I am grateful that people like you exist...thank you for your dedication and well done for your courage and resilience. I agree with Kaz, emotional detachment is more difficult to achieve when we are affected ourselves by the same issues than those we care for.

Owly, reasonable, logical terms do not apply to mental conditions. No wonder those around us have trouble understanding what we are up against. It doesn't mean they don't love us. But yeah...not only does depression alienates us from our real selves, it can also make us feel isolated from our loved ones. But even without mental illness...can one person totally understand another ? We're all different so experience Life differently.

When it comes to expressing your feelings, there are thousands ways of doing so. A right word at the right time, a hug, a smile, a gentle touch, the gift of your time etc...will win hands down over conventional presents. Ultimately, Xmas is more about spirit than material benefits. The commercial aspect of it is only the system taking advantage of this calendar date and enticing us to part with our money.

Struggling doesn't make you a jerk. Battling it out against the odds is what heroes do.

[Lost_Girl]

Dear Moon,

Sending special thoughts and a hug to you. You are indeed a wonderful Mum, very thoughtful. Is the Dragon Slayer giving you some special attention? I hope so, you can't be your own rock.

Thinking of you dear friend xx