Hey ya, Grandy, just stopping by to see how you are going, to give you some gentle gugzies if you'd like them.
I like that you were able to list some things you are doing now. I't's an impressive list. 😺 & you look after yourself pretty good, your furbabies, too. I'm glad you were able to phone Mental Health NSW when you felt you needed.
Sometimes it's hard to see how far we've come over the years. & something happens & we can easily feel as iff nothing has changed. I've felt like that, too. I think that's why we need to make a special effort when we achieve anything, even the small achievements, which at first feel like big achievements for us, but not so much for some others, So, don't worry if others don't get that doing your own shopping is a big achievement - & you need reminding of that from time to time. You also get to celebrate whatever you want.
If you find it hard to go out, but do it anyway - when you do, have a little dance, congratulate yourself. Feeling good about achievement can be a happy memory to keep.
Isn't it a joy to talk to your grandkids? That's something to feel very good about - your relationship with them.
I haven't done nearly so well when trying to reconnect with any of my family, not even my sis & her son.
For me, the relationships are the hardest. Making decisions about myself & my life, what I want & need, all come a close second hardest. I dread making really big mistakes, maybe worse than ever, so I am fearful of making decisions, most especially about relationships.
Other mistakes don't seem so bad now.
Oh, getting too long for a quick 'hello'!
Just one more thing. I wonder why you feel bad for feeling pleased to think that man had lost his wallet? As I've been told several timese: your feelings are your feelings, & none is either 'good' or 'bad'. They are simply what you feel. No judgement comes into it. See the feeling, acknowledge it & let it go... if necessary, "bye-bye" 👋 because it's your feeling & you can do with it what you want.
Hope that helps.
mmMekitty
