Alone..Depressed..Sad..

[Ggrand]

Hi..I'm new here..just need to put my feeling down..no one to talk to makes depression and anxiety so hard...the last 4 days I have either been in bed crying or on the lounge crying..I can't seem to get out of this...I am becoming a prisioner in my own home as its getting progressively difficult to go out.. I have to go out Tuesdays so I do everthing on that day but it's like I'm holding my breathe all day until I get back to the safety of my home then I can let go and that starts the cycle again of spending the next 6 days at home either in bed or on the lounge sad and depressed...I really feel like just giving up.. My husband passed away 4 years on This coming Thursday. My children live 6 hours drive away and have small children so I don't see them that much.Bad mum and grandmum I am on there last visit i was pleased to see them but I just wanted them to go home. I feel so aweful and numb atm..

[Ggrand]

Hello Dear Deebi👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩, mmMeKitty, Hanna, Paws and everyone....🤗..

Thank you all for your posts...

Sorry, it’s taken a while for me to reply...

I was doing some weed pulling Friday and must have pulled a muscle in my upper back...my left shoulder, left side of my ribs and middle of my shoulder blades in my back as well as my neck and head are not really feeling very well atm....my upper back and ribs feels like their all bruised...arm movement or slight twist hurts...Really hope it’s feeling better by tomorrow, Betty still hasn’t got her car fixed and I’m still driving her everywhere....hopefully her son is going to get her another car sometime this week...as hers cannot be fixed anymore...Really do need a car, living in this village..

I am okay with cleaning Deebi....I try to keep my home respectful, deep cleaning I do when the mood hits me...maybe twice a year idk....my home is old, and nothing to look at...I love it sometimes and sometimes I hate it....sometimes I think that’s why son B, decided he didn’t want to get to know me....He still talks to my eldest son...(which does hurt)....maybe because my eldest son has a beautiful home...I think they both like material things in life....Material things mean nothing to me, never has...I’ve seen first hand what having a huge want to have better and more then anyone else can do to a person....

I made a cake today...a r/l cake...chocolate with chocolate frosting....instead of a cake I made cup cakes with the mixture...I will take into work tomorrow for morning tea with the other ladies....

I hope your doing okay bbff Deebi...sometimes I can feel in my heart that your struggling...sending you my biggest hug ever and my deepest love to you...🧸🧸🤗🤗💙💙💙..pubaok, yadimh 24/7..

Sending all my beautiful friend here my love, hugs and care.,💜🤗🦋..

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩Grandy 🕊🌱🌿🌳.

[mmMekitty]

Oh dear, [gentle hug,if you'd like], you must have really got into those weeds. How do you feel while doing such work? I'm curious, because before, when I first move into this little flat, I did enjoy trying to garden (very little success), but I did enjoy the physical exercise,. I think it was rather 'therapeutic', rather like when I'd go walking when I was angry but could not allow myself to express it. The physical activity I was able to do then was an indirect release of those feelings wanted to deny even existed.

Take good care of you, for the good person you are. 

💖💖💖💖

Yes you are, I mean, taking chocolate iced chocolate cupcakes into work, how good is that? I know I'd be thrilled. 😺

mmMekitty

[Hanna3]

Hi Grandy,

That sounds painful! Ouch! Standing under a shower and letting the warm water run on your back and shoulder might help. Maybe a liniment ointment if you can reach? Keep yourself warm.

Today was a lovely sunny day! It's good to see you back posting here, iv been wondering if you are OK.

Take it easy! Your cake sounds wonderful. 🙂🐕🍰🥮🐶

[ecomama]

Dear Grandy, you poor sausage! How's your shoulder, back and ribs feeling now? I hope you can get some relief and it heals quickly. 

I found a great tool called the 'Asian Hand Tool' on a great Australian Organic Gardening site called Green Harvest. It's made weeding 100 x easier. I love mine and they're useful for weeding and other jobs in the garden. 

Also have you heard of magnesium spray? You can get it from a Health Food Shop. You just spray it on the painful areas of your body after a shower and the relief is awesome. My kids use this the most on their legs after long shifts at work. I got a magnesium cream a few weeks ago and needed for a partial hip dislocation (yeah I'm a sausage too!)... amazing stuff. 

Hope you are staying warm? 

Also hope you feel better very soon, 🌻

Love EM

[demonblaster]

Hi darlin 👩‍❤️‍👩 Hannah and all ☺

Yikes you're sure in the wars geez you poor love and the cold weather wouldn't be helping I'd say.

Always close by dear friend 🤗

Really hope it eases off sooner than later and so many places crikey. 

Was thinking a nice hot bath but not liking your chances getting in let alone out. You'd be stuck in a cold one which would hardly do wonders for healing struth.

Maybe a hottie or heat pack could help too darl or near boiling the kettle and make some heat towels. If you're warm enough as well you might catch more zzz's.

Oh that'll be a lot easier if the car for Betty happens soon as planned. You're a really good friend to her Grandz she sounds same mostly. Hope she's going ok. Poor soul wasn't too good for a while there eh. I'm so glad you have eachother.

Thanks for that beautiful post Grandz at mine. Yip we're not sss's for no reason. Yeah/nah pretty rough in patches. Be there sometime soon, usual story lot to say but trouble doing. Was in my mind if that counts 😆🤗

Okey doke must rest these wary eyes. I imagine sleeping will be hard being in so much pain. Ahh Grandy. Wish I could be there for you, 🤔...no going by your weather, wish you could be here then I can be here for you 😚

Hoping you get at least some quality sleep precious  there's great healing mentally and physically.

Nigh nite darlin 👩‍❤️‍👩💜 and everyone ⚘

[Paw Prints]

Oh lass, that sounds so painful... do try & keep the warmth up against that area.  A bath with epsom salts (if you have any) will help... I didn't know until I read Em's reply that you could get it as a spray or cream... the spray would be good as you could apply it more often than you would want to have a bath.

Drats 😉 if I had been on here earlier I might have snuck in to your work & "borrowed" a cup cake or two... 

I'm so pleased Peppa is settling in & learning boundaries... she has definitely landed on her paws having you as her human.

Gentlest of hugs

Paws

[Ggrand]

Hello Deebi👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩, Hanna, Paws, EM and everyone....🤗..

I rang my works main co-ordinator on Monday and she said that the shop will have to close if I couldn’t attend...So I thought okay, I can’t do that to our customers, so I collected Betty* and went to work both days...l.I had heaps of anti inflammatory and pain killers with me....

I found that the body movements through the day, seemed to help a bit....not many otc meds, like when I was laying around, nursing my ouchies....today I’m still sore and bruised but so much better then the past few days I was not doing anything....I bought some weed control and will use that instead of tugging, digging and pulling them out....I have weeds and grass along my fence that are over two feet high...😁....I have noticed that weeds and clover don’t freeze and wither like the lawn grass does...

Work was okay, I tried to take it as easy as I could...and got through the day no worse then I started it....today instead of sitting around I’ll spray those weeds and keep my fur girls inside for a few days...until I know it’s safe for them to venture outside again.....

I still haven’t made an appointment for a kidney scan....I am a unsettled about driving so far into the bigger town and waiting in the waiting room on my own....even with my support worker with me I had trouble staying in the waiting room with so many people....Hmm how am I going to do that alone?.....I could ask Betty to come with me....but I feel embarrassed doing that....so I don’t know, yet how I’m going to do this...

Anyway, I’m heading outside now to get these weeds and clover sprayed...I hoe everyone has a good day mentally and physically.....Oh I bought a great Cd from Vinnies yesrday..the Everly brothers greatest hits...Looking forward to playing that this afternoon...

Deebi, pubaok....am getting better with these forums..so I’ll try to pop in this afternoon/night to say hello and remind you how much of a precious bbff you are to me...💙🦄👼🧸🤗💙..Love you dear friend..

Love you all and sending you my care, love and hugs..🦋💜🤗..

👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩Grandy..

[Hanna3]

Hi Grandy (and everyone!)

I'm sorry I haven't been here today until now.  Great that you went into the store, I've always found gentle movement/exercise is better than resting too much for injuries, so I'm glad working in the store helped!  I think muscles stiffen up too much if we stay resting too long. 

Ooh, you bought a CD of the Everly Brothers, I love them!  I did "All I have to do is dream" on guitar with my teacher, I love that song.  I listen to them on Utube sometimes, but I don't have any CDs of them.  You will enjoy it!

I am reluctant to use weed spray because of Sam.. the weeds grow long just near the back porch, and he has a tendency to graze on the grass there sometimes... and if I spray and it goes on the grass and he eats it... I don't know how I can stop him going out to relieve himself and then he has to go past the grass.. so I understand why you are keeping your furs inside.  Spray is much easier than trying to pull the weeds up for sure!  I don't think you should do much of that while you have an injury.  

Could you ask your friend to go with you to the scan and wait with you until you, and buy her lunch afterwards, or morning/afternoon tea (I don't know what time your scan would be).  I think it would be fine if she was going to have a nice outing with you before or after?    Or take her to lunch another day to thank her?  What do you think?  

Sam has had such long fur because he's been sick for too long, finally I got him clipped today, now he is so cold!  I have put one jumper on top of another on him... and it's going to be freezing tonight!  Anyway at least I can see his face at last - it's been disappearing under the fur!

I don't know what my word length is now, so I had better stop here!  Big hugs! 😁

[Tess2]

Hi Grandy, this is tess. I am not sure about this new website, I am finding it hard to navigate my way about and to catch up. 

But I really admire you. And want to keep in touch,  you are a really special lady 

tess

[mmMekitty]

Hello Grandy,

Good to see you are taking care of yourself & your furbabies. Nowadays, the medical people & allied health care workers are saying to move, not entirely rest such injuries. They even tell me to keep moving, stretching & such even after I told them about the bursitis in my right shoulder. They emphasise doing things slowly, gently as possible, but the Doing above all, to just keep moving. I can feel the limits, & moving slowly keeps me from doing too much.

Trouble is while feeling so cold, the tendancy is to stay warm, bundled up & not reaching out, extending limbs, etc. Wouldn't we rather roll up in a blanket?

I think you are doing so much better, getting out, to your work, out into your garden, taking Furbabies out for walks, too, when the wether permits (barely permits, I think) - so much colder there & for Hanna, & others than I have to complain about.)

💖💖💖💖

Always,

mmMekitty